Get fat fast!

I know that in the past I've said I'm against organ donations.

In this case I am willing to donate to you two stone of my body fat. This is probably all I have to give so we'd be doing each other a favour.
I can guarantee it's very warm and also friendly too.
All you have to do to keep it happy is to feed it ale and pork pies twice a week. It also enjoys a regular full english breakfast.

email in trust ;)
 
Get a tumour

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thats just harsh, but rite up my humour street!:D

Now that's just taking it to extremes to be honest. Body-conscious people make me laugh.

im not body concious! i just need some weight lol all donations accepted with open arms hehe
 
Most people know that BMI, realistically is a load of crap. It is, and only ever will be a rough approximation. It doesn't cater what so ever for people with "higher than average" muscle or bone density, and as everyone is different you won't get consistent results.

Fatty trying to prove his BMI doesnt mean anything ;)
 
People say eat lots of quality food etc to gain weight but I do (as well as a few not so good things) and I don't gain weight.

you do NOT eat lots then. you might think you do, but in reality you are burning the calories that you are consuming. Eat more.
 
In general terms:

1g protein = 4kcals
1g carbs = 4kcals
1g fat = 8kcals

What's the easiest way to get fat? Eat fat. Get hooj in half the time. Actually eating loads of fat is surprisingly difficult so add a few carbs to ease the consumption :D
 
If Input Calories ≠ Burned Calories
Then
Weight_gain = true
else
weight_gain = false
end if
 
Fatty trying to prove his BMI doesnt mean anything ;)

Aren't you clever...

If you had any sense you'd know why BMI is a load of crap.

Yes, I am overweight, but the BMI classification of things is ridiculous. I am "overweight" but I am also of a "large build" I gain muscle mass easily, where as a friend of mine works out at the gym, but doesn't build up muscle mass as easily as I do.

Do you understand the way the human body is? There's 3 different body structures, which invalidate BMI instantly as you can't compare one to the other on a simple height to weight ratio. Anyone who thinks you can use it the way BMI is used, then you've got your head up your arse.

Ectomorphic: characterized by long and thin muscles/limbs and low fat storage; usually referred to as slim.

Mesomorphic: characterized by large bones, solid torso, low fat levels, wide shoulders with a narrow waist.

Endomorphic: characterized by increased fat storage, a wide waist and a large bone structure.

Explain to me how a weight to height ratio can be right for all 3 of those body types? Realistically, there'd have to be a scale for each body type, and even then it would still be very flawed and only a general guidance. So if you believe BMI is a reliable method, then you need to remove your face from your rectum.
 
BMI doesn't work for everyone. My dad for example is a keen road cyclist, takes part in large rides in italy / france - he's classed as 'overweight' yet the majority is muscle mass.

My BMI is 22, although I prefer to go by bodyfat %

5ft 10.5 / 10st 13lb / 12% BF

I'm trying to build some extra mass this summer, it's a pain in the arse making sure you eat the right amounts / foods.
 
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Seriously, how do you get like the last picture gareth.e posted?! I've heard of beer belly, but that is ridiculous! I have seen people like that in real life too, what causes the bulge to stay so localised :confused:
 
as said above BMI is floored, I was underweight for some time, just because I was of a slim build and did not put weight on, even when eating crap.
Now im seen as healthy, though im hideously unfit compared to what I was, iv just basically put weight on here and there, its not noticable but its a massive difference compared to what I used to be.
 
The bodies great at burning fat, its awful at dealing with carb's, insulin kills the fat burning process, eat lots of high GI carbs early in the day, and fat once your blood sugar drops hard, rinse and repeat.

because of all the crap the body releases to deal with ridiculous sugar levels from carbs, and their crappy quality in general from higher GI types the body finds it harder to burn the 4 calories from carbs than the 9 from fat(if you're eating a low carb diet, with only high QUALITY carbs which would be low GI, which you should be really).
 
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