Another story. I lived in the top room of the three story house and was in home alone. I had just settled into bed about 2am and all was quiet. Suddenly I hear the front door slam open, which alerted me. Then there came a banging....... something was sprinting up the stairs. Bang bang bang bang... all the way to the third floor! When it reached the top, my door burst open violently and a shadowy figure screamed as loud as he could into my face.
Oh, how hilarious drunken housemates are.
Lol, that's the problem, it didn't.
(joking)
I can explain.
As you regard your other half as a bint, that clearly is a sexist term which will naturally enrage the current PC obsessed Labour Government. As such, authorisation will have been granted for a discreet Intrud-o-Cam to be put through the letterbox and it will have wormed its way upstairs to monitor your every move.
It may have disturbed the door as it snooped in.
You have used a sexist term twice.
Harriet Harman's bedside phone will be glowing red now.
A good 18 inches has put her off ey.![]()
Serve the supernatural entity with a notice to pay rent, if they don't, file papers in your nearest Court and if they fail to serve a Defence you should get a judgment in default which will let you re-possess the room.
I saw a film once and it scareded me.
Have you tried hoovering the room ?
It may suck the ghostly entity into the bag. You can then check through the safety of Perspex if a supernatural entity is in there.
Alternatively, spray the room with Newcastle Brown Ale as it doubles quite well as holy water.
Serve the supernatural entity with a notice to pay rent, if they don't, file papers in your nearest Court and if they fail to serve a Defence you should get a judgment in default which will let you re-possess the room.
It's the ghost of Literacy Past.