Swimming pool got me TEEN PREGNANT

My logic is thus.

Lets say there was a person, some 2000 years ago, who gave birth to a child who people decided they'd believe to be the messiah. To make this appear even better someone decided to spread the rumour that his mother was not knocked up via the usual way but in a divine intervention by this "god". Now the reallity was she liked to get funky with Joe and got knocked up the traditional way which involves sperm.

So the original "immaculate conception" was no different to this "immaculate conception". She got a good old roggering.

;)

Edit: a little strong for 12:50, I;ll re-edit lol.
 
To make this appear even better someone decided to spread the rumour that his mother was not knocked up via the usual way but in a divine intervention by this "god". Now the reallity was she liked to get funky with Joe and got knocked up the traditional way which involves sperm.

So the original "immaculate conception" was no different to this "immaculate conception". She got a good old roggering.

;)

Not many people know this but Mary did not get pregnant by immaculate conception. She herself was from immaculate conception. So she did have a good old "roggering" by Josef her husband as you put it.
 
lol - the excuses girls come out with to cover up the fact they've been sleeping around

I guess there was that other young lass called Mary who came up with a dodgy tale about two thousand years ago after she'd had a one night stand.

must be something about the middle east
 
Most Christianity? So what from the Ten Commandments you find in bad taste?

Lol okay, you win prize for speedy replies... well people make out that Christianity is good when you only have to turn the TV on to find that, for example, a teacher from a roman catholic religious school assualted that pupil...

Its just my opinion,religious people seem to be oblivious to almost everything in life, the world is a ****hole (for some people) and you still believe that some guy living in clouds is watching all this????

Edit (again): I regret saying that first comment now - a bit strong, but I just get frusrated sometimes when people are all happy singing in Church and there are people dieing every couple of seconds around the world from, what we percieve as a developed country, trivial things.
 
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This would mean someone jacked off in the pool for this to happen. She saw someone jack off into the pool?
 
Why is she contacting the Polish tourist authorities about the case? It's not even their jurisdiction unless she is claiming against the location where the contract is formed, if she is going to present it properly then I'd have thought it would have to be with the Egyptian authorities because that is where the alleged offence took place.

Apart from the legalities it should be laughed out of court and someone should also be informing the lady a little about the facts of life since she appears to either not know or not be willing to face them.
 
Lol okay, you win prize for speedy replies... well people make out that Christianity is good when you only have to turn the TV on to find that, for example, a teacher from a roman catholic religious school assualted that pupil...

Its just my opinion,religious people seem to be oblivious to almost everything in life, the world is a ****hole (for some people) and you still believe that some guy living in clouds is watching all this????

Most priests are not even Christians and want to destory the faith. To understand who stole our faith, we need to take a look at the history of "political correctness."
Before World War I, Marxist theory said that if Europe ever erupted in war, the working classes in every European country would rise in revolt, overthrow their governments and create a new Communist Europe. But when war broke out in the summer of 1914, that didn't happen. Instead, the workers in every European country lined up by the millions to fight their country's enemies. Finally, in 1917, a Communist revolution did occur, in Russia. But attempts to spread that revolution to other countries failed because the workers did not support it.

After World War I ended in 1918, Marxist theorists had to ask themselves the question: What went wrong? As good Marxists, they could not admit Marxist theory had been incorrect. Instead, two leading Marxist intellectuals, Antonio Gramsci in Italy and Georg Lukacs in Hungary independently came up with the same answer.

They said that Western culture and the Christian religion had so blinded the working class to its true, Marxist class interests, that A COMMUNIST REVOLUTION WAS IMPOSSIBLE IN THE WEST, UNTIL BOTH COULD BE DESTROYED. THAT OBJECTIVE HAS NEVER CHANGED.

Gramsci famously laid out a strategy for destroying Christianity and Western culture, one that has proven all too successful. INSTEAD OF CALLING FOR A COMMUNIST REVOLUTION UP FRONT, AS IN RUSSIA, HE SAID MARXISTS IN THE WEST SHOULD TAKE POLITICAL POWER LAST, AFTER A "LONG MARCH THROUGH THE INSTITUTIONS" – THE SCHOOLS, THE MEDIA, EVEN THE CHURCHES, EVERY INSTITUTION THAT COULD INFLUENCE THE CULTURE. That "long march through the institutions" is what the Western world has experienced, especially since the 1960s…

So now we have hordes of marxist priests, atheist priests, gay/pedo priests and female priests.


Many people ask this question...
"If God existed then why so much war, so much pain, so much hate, so much despair?"

Because to establish mankind as one of his most prized creations
He blessed man with what is one of his biggest gifts...
and yet his biggest responsibility

Freedom of choice

When you understand the value of such a responsibility, you will never ask such a question.
 
So now we have hordes of marxist priests, atheist priests, gay/pedo priests and female priests.

You really see this as some huge conspiracy? And out of interest who are you to say what is and is not Christian?

Many people ask this question...
"If God existed then why so much war, so much pain, so much hate, so much despair?"

Because to establish mankind as one of his most prized creations
He blessed man with what is one of his biggest gifts...
and yet his biggest responsibility

Freedom of choice

When you understand the value of such a responsibility, you will never ask such a question.

The value of freedom of choice is the ability to choose to be whatever - good, bad, indifferent? Correct?

So why is it not a valid question, if God created man in his image then God must surely be flawed as man is?

//edit this is miles away from a light hearted topic about a swimming pool causing pregnancy, my apologies.
 
You really see this as some huge conspiracy? And out of interest who are you to say what is and is not Christian?

Don't have to be anyone to have common sense. A Christian do not have gay sex. even more so with little boys! Or do you have another view?

The value of freedom of choice is the ability to choose to be whatever - good, bad, indifferent? Correct?

Correct

So why is it not a valid question, if God created man in his image then God must surely be flawed as man is?

God would be flawed if he was making wars, murdering, raping ect ect ect as is everyone who do such things.
 
Don't have to be anyone to have common sense. A Christian do not have gay sex. even more so with little boys! Or do you have another view?

The reason I ask what your basis is to be the arbiter of who and what is or is not Christian is that lots of people claim that they are Christian, many of them believe that they've got the 'right' and sometimes only possible version of Christianity - what makes yours right?


I'm glad we can at least agree on the definition and point of free will then.

God would be flawed if he was making wars, murdering, raping ect ect ect as is everyone who do such things.

God did murder although that was mainly Old Testament God and we've got the semantic issue of whether divine vengeance really counts as murder or not.

You've still also got the basic problem that if God created man in his own image then all the traits that man exhibits (good, bad and indifferent) must have had some basis in the creator. Alternatively if you go with nurture over nature then since God is supposed to have created our entire World then he's still culpable for the environs. And all that before we even get into the issues of omnicience and omnipresence.
 
guys please, every thread that has a religious themed joke does not need to turn into full on bible rubbish.
 
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