Student stories

Most of mine come from my first year at uni where it was 8 guys and 1 girl sharing a 3 storey house.

I remember one occasion where we all got home drunk one night and turned the house into what looked like a spiders nest. Several rolls of sellotape later and we had to climb through the hallways, empty vodka bottles and cans suspended in front of you.
I woke up the next day to find an old letter saying we had prospective students being shown around the house in about 15 minutes! Everyone running around the house with scissors and knives was... interesting.

Fireworks were also a problem... especially when toilet roll is tied to them (it catches on fire) and end up in your landlords garden (who lives next door), or some bright spark decides tin-opening empty beer cans and fitting them to rockets and running for cover.
 
Oh wow, that's quite fascinating. I'm at Royal Holloway in Egham and have seen the old Brunel building in Runnymede. It is quite remarkable.

Up at the newer campus in Uxbridge there is a rumour that there is an empty swimming pool on top of the lecture centre, but due to design faults, the building couldn't support the weight of the water in there.

Quite ironic for a University named after an engineering legend.
 
One of my mates tell a story about his shared house. After one of the housemates left they got in a new guys who was a but quiet and kept himself to himself. The rest of them went out on a bender one night and came home to find the TV in the lounge on with a porno on it. The room, however, looked empty. At this point the housemate pops up from the sofa (which was facing away from everyone standing in the doorway) with his mouth in a perfect "O" shape. Yes, he'd be gobbling himself off. Hilarity ensues, the new guy runs off and when everyone woke in the morning they discovered he'd moved out in the night.
 
There was a rumour going around Manchester Uni when I was there about a girl who got named 'Bottle Girl'. Basically she got friendly with a bottle in front of a crowd in halls and it got recorded, video got sent around and she left Uni after walking into a bar where everyone chanted 'Bottle Girl'.

Anyway, a year or two later, I came across said video so it turns out it was true.

Outrageous! How can you take such perverted pleasure in someone being so degraded! :mad:


.....email is in trust though :D
 
I've seen that video, bout 4 guys in the room? One of my mates who stayed on at Manchester knew her.

KaHn

"wants to see" :D

Apparently the fire evacuation procedure for uni halls with regards to disabled (wheelchair bound) students in floors higher than ground level, is just to put them into a room, lock the door and tell the fire dept the room number /where you put them:p

this reminds me of something in the first year, haha boring story really... one of my flat mates ran up and down the street naked when we were all outside after the fire alarm went off at 9 at night ....


Another one was me in the first year me and the ex were going at it like rabbits and usually she used a pillow for obv reasons, but this time it ended up on the floor and she screamed...knock on the door a few minutes later from my flat mate asking if i was watching porn.... i dont think it helped that i answered it stark naked with a rock on :D


finally I was accused by the halls manager, that I came through the garage doors at my halls, not literally but opening them at 2am (I had a key fob as I parked my car there) with 2 ladies next thing there's apparent footage of me and them doing "unsavoury" things (his choice of words) on the first floor I was told there was video footage had been handed to the police but he wouldn't show me :o my reply was its a shock to me but what a legend to whoever it was :D


.....sadly it wasnt me :(
 
My only student story occurred during my Maths A-Level final exams way back in 2002. About 15 minutes from the end of allowed time this girl suddenly jumps up and screams rather dramatically something along the lines of "I can't ******* do this!", then runs sobbing from the exam hall, clipping the door frame with her shoulder on the way out before going sprawling onto her back on the corridor floor. Hilarity ensued.
 
Last edited:
First year in halls.

Flat opposite had the student hall monitor or some other rubbish that basically lets people in second year stop in halls cheap.

She was mental, and always left her mess EVERYWHERE.

So one day the other people got fed up when she left a pan full of something on the hob over night and simply placed it outside her room. (In the pan, not thrown over or anything).

The girl comes home from wherever she was and goes crazy, screaming and crying.

She then runs to the kitchen, grabs a knife and tries to stab the person who put the pan down.

After the knife was taken from her she grabs an ironing board and starts hitting people with it.

Security eventually turned up and we never saw her again!
 
First year in halls.

Flat opposite had the student hall monitor or some other rubbish that basically lets people in second year stop in halls cheap.

She was mental, and always left her mess EVERYWHERE.

So one day the other people got fed up when she left a pan full of something on the hob over night and simply placed it outside her room. (In the pan, not thrown over or anything).

The girl comes home from wherever she was and goes crazy, screaming and crying.

She then runs to the kitchen, grabs a knife and tries to stab the person who put the pan down.

After the knife was taken from her she grabs an ironing board and starts hitting people with it.

Security eventually turned up and we never saw her again!
I call bull****.

No one would go mental like that at a pan being outside their door, also how did she know who put the pan there?
 
Last edited:
A lad I know was getting annoyed at someone on his floor stealing his milk all the time, he knew who it was but the lad would own up.

So he took a video of him peeing in the milk, not sure how much just enough so it still looked like milk and put it back in the fridge, when the milk was finished he announced to everyone what he did and showed them the video.

Dont think the lad who was stealing the milk saw the funny side.

KaHn
 
One of my housemates put a few laxative tablets in one of my other housemates milks as an act of revenge a few years ago. Apparenty she was "ill" all that night and the next day, however I called ******** about the illness (I saw him put the tablets in) because there is no way 4 over the counter laxative pills mixed into a couple of pints of milk is going to do anything to anyone (having had experience with proper laxatives)...

He got his revenge however and she was fine so no harm done...
 
Where would one obtain a copy of this "Bottle Girl" video?

Not that I'm looking for it or anything, but... email's in trust.

On topic, I've apparently had a very boring couple of years living as a student! Still, its all going to catch up and happen soon, isn't it?
 
The fresher who didn't know how to cook but decided to grill some eggs. Whole. With shell.

Also the girl I knew who tried to cook spaghetti in a pot but forgot the water.
 
Skully never spouts untruths, and that's the truth :D

Overexaggerating then, no way the kind of girl who would pull a knife for someone putting a pot outside her door would have gotten through education and through to uni.
I don't believe it, maybe going mental if she's just an annoying ***** who needs a slap round the face and a kick in the ****. But pulling a knife and trying to batter people with an ironing board, no way.

Can't see her being taken away and her parents not at least coming to clean out her stuff and such either.
 
Up at the newer campus in Uxbridge there is a rumour that there is an empty swimming pool on top of the lecture centre, but due to design faults, the building couldn't support the weight of the water in there.

Quite ironic for a University named after an engineering legend.

Ahh the old swimming pool on the roof gag. Typically the best way of trapping freshers on a roof.

"hey man you've got to check out the olympic sized pool on the roof..."

I'm sure thats in a film.
 
Back
Top Bottom