Another thread on self sevice tills ...

Soldato
Joined
4 Jan 2004
Posts
3,200
Like many others on here I hate the self service tills at supermarkets and it got me thinking about what would make them better (or more tolerable). We know that we can have our satnav talk to us in different celebs voices and I wondered if it would make the self service tills better to use if they also had this feature :confused:

Do you think it would help having a celebs voice on self service and if you do, who would be in your top three?

I'd go for Morgan Freeman, Sean Connery and Joanna Lumley as my voices.



Al :D
 
I think they should have guns attached to them and randomly pick off people in the queue.

These of course should only be used for people who don't scan quickly enough. Oh, and Gingers :p

Mind you, if Morgan Freeman was reading out your shopping then you'd best not be in a hurry as he'd take quite a while I'd imagine :D
 
Split the self-service checkouts into two sections and have supermarkets run a free test on their use. If you pass, you get a license that allows you to use the tills set aside for people who know what the hell they're doing. The license would also carry RFID age verification, so I don't have to wait for the checkout nazis to finish assisting Chantelle McTard with her packing to pay for my beer.
 
"So, you expect me to talk?"
"No, I expect you to pay.... three pounds fifty pence"
 
I'd like it to be Megan Fox's voice. And by her voice I mean her. And by on the self service till I mean...hang on, where were we?
 
Definite time limit. If you spend longer than 3 seconds per item it charges you £5 per second you go over. They can even be independant of the standard self service tills..

Like a fast track for those who have the slightest hand eye co-ordination.... Possibly shoot people who inccur too many charges.
 
Definite time limit. If you spend longer than 3 seconds per item it charges you £5 per second you go over. They can even be independant of the standard self service tills..

Like a fast track for those who have the slightest hand eye co-ordination.... Possibly shoot people who inccur too many charges.

I dunno, have you ever tried to buy a 5 pack of wrigleys extra gum at a tesco self service? It really doesn't like it that item.
 
Split the self-service checkouts into two sections and have supermarkets run a free test on their use. If you pass, you get a license that allows you to use the tills set aside for people who know what the hell they're doing. The license would also carry RFID age verification, so I don't have to wait for the checkout nazis to finish assisting Chantelle McTard with her packing to pay for my beer.

Hey Dad, can I borrow your Tesco card? Want to go... ermm.. buy some sweets..:p
 
I dunno, have you ever tried to buy a 5 pack of wrigleys extra gum at a tesco self service? It really doesn't like it that item.

You are no longer permitted to buy chewing gum at the self service counter. Nor things that cannot be weighed by the automatic scale alone. Also. PUT THE ITEM ON THE SCANNER. Even when it says "Place the item in the bagging area" Put the next item on the scanner and it'll beep automatically. Don't keep swiping it like an idiot, looking around for the bloke. THERES A SCANNER ON THE BOTTOM AND FACING YOU TOO. </rant>
 
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