the friend who has now split up with his gf

Surely you've had the kind of pasty that makes you feel like you're a horse with blinders on ?

And once you get out of that relationship you realise how much of a **** you've been neglecting your friends.
 
crunchman said:
Surely you've had the kind of pasty that makes you feel like you're a horse with blinders on ?

And once you get out of that relationship you realise how much of a **** you've been neglecting your friends.
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i have been head over heels into someone but have always maintained strong communication lines and social outtings with friends. i would never put friends to the back of the pack over a girlfriend, it easy to find and maintain the balance.
 
Casdawer said:
I disagree.

With a true friend you can not talk for years and still be friends.
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Depends on the circumstances. There's a big difference between not talking because someone can't be bothered and not talking because they've moved away. A true friend is someone that'll keep in contact no matter what and the OPs friend doesn't sound like that sort of person.
 
He's a mate, regardless of how much time he has spent away from "the scene" he should be welcomed back as if nothing has happened, its the way of the man and an unwritten rule of being a man, don't let us down.
 
LOAM said:
He's a mate, regardless of how much time he has spent away from "the scene" he should be welcomed back as if nothing has happened, its the way of the man and an unwritten rule of being a man, don't let us down.
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I have to disagree with this to some extent. A year? OK. 2 years? Mayybbeeee. But 3? Anyone who forsook his friends for that long would be relegated to minor pal status and have to work to get back the former trust. My inner circle of mates is only 5 or 6 strong, some have girlfriends, but none would dream of cutting contact and ties with their friends for the sake of a woman... they do what good friends do, and make time for both.

I wouldn't turn the guy away, but there's no way he'd be waltzing in as though nothing had happened.
 
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I'd tell him to do one, personally.

A (once) good friend of mine found himself a lady friend, after a couple of weeks we saw him on occasion, after a few months we rarely heard from him.

It's been a few years since I saw him last, he never replied to texts, phonecalls etc.

If he asked me to go out for a drink my reply would probably be "why?"

I don't know him anymore, he's no friend of mine.
I've since learned he's basically cut himself off from everybody, just him and her, when that relationship goes **** up, which it will, it's not going to end well for him.

Brought it on himself, well that, and she's a complete nutter.
 
LizardKing said:
Is that not what friends are for??
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I agree to a point but isn't the opposite also true. Just because you’re in a relationship doesn’t mean you should stop seeing your friends. I'm always carful to make sure I keep in contact with my close friends even if I have other commitments and a relationship to take care of. It sounds like this guy hasn't.

What really ***** me off is when a friend really wants to go and socialise with mates for years but can't because of the limpet they have at home. Then they split up and he's out and about for a couple of weeks, then they get back together again and he disappears, they split up again.... ad infinitum.
 
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The problem here is the girl.

When im with my girlfriend, she loves doing stuff like going out, dancing, drinking, watching football, playing pool, watching a movie etc so really anything that I would normally do with my friends, she's more then happy to do as well, and vice versa.

I really don't see why having a gf/bf should stop you from doing stuff with your friends as well.

Only problem is shes on the other side of the world at the moment :(
 
do they expect just to pick things back up from where they left?
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Slightly different scenario as I have broken a bone rather than split up but I text my mates already telling them they had better be ready for my impending return (I am convalescing away from home) and I get the odd gracious/drunken text saying wish I was here, when am I back etc. So yes my friends and I expect to pick up where we left off.
 
Echoing most of the above points, go out for a pint with him. Situations change and so does the amount of time you can spend with your friends.
 
Take the mick, give him the "I thought you were dead" line, but most of all, be a mate and go out on the lash with him! :)

Women do strange things to some of us and tend to give the "do you *have* to go out with your friends tonight... [sulk]" spiel quite a lot. Some people literally end up being cut off :(
 
If I could be bothered with quoting 90% of the replies here I would.
I am of the same opinion.
OP has woman hormones. :p
 
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