Going to lose my Dad soon

WrathOfAchilles · 2 Apr 2011 at 01:15

Really sorry to read about your situation

Enjoy what time you can with your old man, be it a day or 30 years. Let the rest of the family deal with it how they must, be it cry or conspire - just be the man you want your old man to remember you as, and as you want to be remembered.

Damnations Fury · 2 Apr 2011 at 01:53

brucey034 said:
They have found a tumour on the base of his spine, and one at the top.
The hospital are waiting for the results of a biopsy on his liver to determine the type of cancer.
They are talking about operating on his spine.
I assume they would not operate if they thought he would be gone next week ?

Not read the the thread the whole way through, but my dad has bowel and liver cancer. He is on fairly heavy stuff (tube through his arm directly to just above his heart to pump the drugs in more directly) and yet they are still not sure if they will be able to operate on the liver cancer.

So while not triyng to give false hope, talking about operating is a good thing, it means it isn't terminal yet.

Hades · 2 Apr 2011 at 02:12

Terrible news

albert · 2 Apr 2011 at 02:37

...i haven't read anywhere in this post that you have spoken to your brother and told him to back off.

Dickyb0b · 2 Apr 2011 at 05:36

was he a smoker?

GothicCorpse · 2 Apr 2011 at 05:46

God be with you at this troubling time

also my thought's are with you

GothicCorpse · 2 Apr 2011 at 06:22

Nice, family is nice you can suck it up together, family can pull together.

.Kencs · 2 Apr 2011 at 07:00

You need to speak to your bro, tell him how it is affecting you and he needs to step back as he is coming across ungreatful.

I don't know you or your bro, but by the sounds of him he doesn't care much for your dad, just wants the money side of things, and I know its harsh to say but that is how he seems, you on the other hand, we can tell your really concerned for your dad, and I can see where your coming from, my dad has bowel cancel, and has a tube into his arm and to his heart. I have always looked up to my dad and to see him in such a way really hurts.

Everyone is here for you mate if you need to talk about anything alright?

Take it easy mate

Sayso · 2 Apr 2011 at 07:54

My dad died a few years ago and we were very close, all i can say is spend as much time as possible with him, have fun if you can, talk as much as you can and be there for him....**** your brother he isn't part of the equation its about you and your dad.
Prepare for the worst but don't let it spoil the time you have together.

.Kencs · 2 Apr 2011 at 08:08

Sayso said:
My dad died a few years ago and we were very close, all i can say is spend as much time as possible with him, have fun if you can, talk as much as you can and be there for him....**** your brother he isn't part of the equation its about you and your dad.
Prepare for the worst but don't let it spoil the time you have together.

couldn't have said it better myself

rosso5792 · 2 Apr 2011 at 13:05

Sayso said:
My dad died a few years ago and we were very close, all i can say is spend as much time as possible with him, have fun if you can, talk as much as you can and be there for him....**** your brother he isn't part of the equation its about you and your dad.
Prepare for the worst but don't let it spoil the time you have together.

this,

sorry to hear about your dad

brucey034 · 2 Apr 2011 at 13:56

albert said:
...i haven't read anywhere in this post that you have spoken to your brother and told him to back off.

I had a chat to my brother as did my dad.
He has backed off, so we can concentrate on more important things ie caring for dad.

brucey034 · 2 Apr 2011 at 13:58

Dickyb0b said:
was he a smoker?

Yes he is a smoker, although he is not now he is in hospital.

Mikoyan · 2 Apr 2011 at 16:51

thoughts go out to you and your family in particular your dad, good luck and all the best

brucey034 · 3 Apr 2011 at 01:55

Need some advice.
My dad gave us a loan of £3000 to buy our car so we could transport our dogs about etc.
He had our mk4 golf for £2500 and he loaned us £3000. (our car cost £5500)
We have paid him back £500, so we owe dad £2500.
We are paying my dad back £25 a week.
When dad dies my brother wants this money from us, because he says thats what we owe dad so should be taken into consideration.
I have explained we are in financial hardship at the moment, which is true.
They have a Audi Q5 brand new, 6 hols a year and £20000 in the bank.
How do we stand ?
There is no writen agreement between us and my dad, all word of mouth.
Do I need legal advice ?
Help
dont need this at the moment, wanna look after my dad.

brucey034 · 3 Apr 2011 at 01:57

brucey034 said:
I had a chat to my brother as did my dad.
He has backed off, so we can concentrate on more important things ie caring for dad.

Guess he hasn't backed off after all.

Monkeh · 3 Apr 2011 at 01:58

If your dad hasn't said you have to pay your brother back then the debt passes on with him, end of. Reading the thread your brother sounds like a complete dick, sorry to say, I'd be telling him to jog on about now, or words to this extent.

brucey034 · 3 Apr 2011 at 02:03

Monkeh said:
If your dad hasn't said you have to pay your brother back then the debt passes on with him, end of. Reading the thread your brother sounds like a complete dick, sorry to say, I'd be telling him to jog on about now, or words to this extent.

Thanks mate, my dad is high on morphine now so my bro seems to be manipulating him when me and my wife are not there with dad.

brucey034 · 3 Apr 2011 at 02:03

I am the oldest son, does that carry any weight these days ?

arc@css · 3 Apr 2011 at 02:07

I expect it has already been suggested but do get legal advice. I wish you all the best.