Sexual harrassment and intimidation in the workplace

Gackt said:
Indeed. Financial difficulties. Can she not borrow or move in with family/friends for a while, considering the exception circumstances?

And she doesn't like being out of work. That's a poor reason to allow sexual harrassment really. It sounds like it's affecting her more emotionally than she might be letting on. No work > being sexually harassed. Anyone with a bit of logical thinking can tell that.
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First things first, she isn't 'allowing' the harrasment :p if she was, it wouldn't really be harrassment, it'd be regular consensual flirting!

I suppose being with family/friends isnt a huge issue really - it isn't that as simple or clear cut as that but when is it ever! I don't really know the ins and outs entirely. It is always a 'fall back' though. The not wanting to be out of work I think stems from a concern about only being there for a month or thereabouts and then quitting may look bad to prospective employers. It is obviously fully explainable but needs to get to that stage in the first place.

You are right - it definately has a huge emotional impact - I can't even begin to imagine what it is like and it appears at first glance that the obvious solution is to quit and move on with your life. Especially as the company policy is not to provide personal references - only contractual, from HR. Then you get into the matter of pride, a matter of not running away from problems and all that other psychological garbage that comes with a problem that is such a complete and utter mind ****. Its a very difficult situation.

There are other things that can be done besides quitting though, other options are available hence this thread to get advice. If at the end of it, all things considered, the best solution as she sees it is to walk away, then so be it. If however, she wants to keep the job till she finds something else then she needs to act accordingly to make life temporarily more bearable at work etc etc.

Hope that makes things a bit clearer :)
 
Six6siX said:
I appreciate that this is one of those threads where the content is largely one sided
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Totally inexcusable behaviour, you could maybe take some of those points in isolation and brush it off (for example manipulation of shift patterns could be exaggerated/misunderstanding/coincidence) but add them all together and it sounds pretty dispicable.



  • Inappropriate touching (hands around waist under the guise of leaning over a desk next to her when demonstrating something on a computer and breasts under the excuse of pulling her top up)
  • Being followed around and asked for kisses
  • sending pestering texts/calls asking her to meet up outside of work all the time. Also, messages of a sexual nature
  • He continually asks personal questions about her sex life
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One side of the argument or not, that sort of thing makes me pretty angry. I've seen casual harrassment in the workplace, you know, asking about sex lives in a jokey way, maybe arm round the waist every now and then but it surprises me to see that type of thing going on so openly without reciprocation.

Difficult one when it comes to finances; if I was in her position I would probably just lodge a formal complaint and be prepared to resign, but then I can afford to be out of work for a bit. Yes I know it is terrible having to resign due to bullying but just for my own mental health I wouldn't want to have to put up with that and would take the hit to improve my wellbeing. I genuinely wouldn't want to work for that company anyway and while in an ideal world I'd get some sort of legal victory, part of me would want to just be shot of the whole affair.
 
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buchtis said:
English Muslim? What the **** is that? You're either English or Muslim, not some cross breed.

The fact of the matter is that these races have backwards beliefs where women are trash, mere play toys. I don't really have to expand on this to be honest, feel free to Google it, there's plenty of cases.
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I'm guessing you're not going to want my opinion on this, yeah?
 
LOL at the people wanting the company named. It's a delicate enough situation as it is without feeding the ravenous OcUK 'detectives' a juicy bone like that! If the poor girl gets nowhere and ends up quitting, then I think a bit of subtle naming and shaming should happen ;)
 
Surely if this is as big a company as you say, the most simple process is to go to the area manager (as most companies will state in the handbook that if you have a problem and your grieveance is with your manager) and they will deal with your grieveance.
 
I'm wondering, if this ever went to court and the employers legal representation got hold of this thread, would it damage her case in any way?

This is why CAB should always be the first port of call.
 
This is awful poor girl

I have this happen to me although the women did look like cameron diaz
she would txt me rude things and send me naked pics of her self

but i am a married man it not a nice postion to be in
I choose to leave the job and change my mobile no
i have never told my wife about it though
 
fullmetaltony said:
I'm wondering, if this ever went to court and the employers legal representation got hold of this thread, would it damage her case in any way?

This is why CAB should always be the first port of call.
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I'm not sure how it could taint the case in any way, shape, or form. If what the OP has written is consistent with the accounts given by his friend to HR then surely they wouldn't bother using this thread against her... It will only enforce her case as she felt the need to ask friend for help and to get them to help her by finding out enough information to approach the situation as best possible.
 
It's pretty terrible having to endure those things whilst trying to do your job.

I'd send her straight to HR and have a grievance filed. As it's her manager who a part of it, HR is the safest bet.

You probably don't want to have her confront them and inform them about her plans as it depends on how speedy her HR department is. (Ours is terrible and very slow to process requests). So she might end up having to work with them for another month in an even worse situation.

I can see this ending in her looking for work elsewhere with perhaps a settlement.

My friends mother recently sued her employer on 6 counts of sexual harrasment and other similar offences. She won :)

Dreading work for works sake is bad enough let alone having to put up with inappropriate advances all day. Hope this gets sorted.
 
My actions would be the following:

  • Log everything that happens. Don't delete text messages.
  • Go straight to HR or the manager's manager. Don't try and engage in debate with him.
  • Make a formal complaint to HR. If nothing happens pronto, you also have the option of reporting him to the Police for harassment charges. I would mention this to HR when submitting the complaint, making it very clear you are not happy with your manager's criminal conduct and will take this further.
  • Continue to make it very clear you are not interested. Record when you say this and responses.
  • Seek legal advice if you feel it is necessary.
 
I'd be careful outside of work too, if they're getting contact details from the emergency register then they won't fret about getting address details by whatever means either.
 
mrk said:
I'd be careful outside of work too, if they're getting contact details from the emergency register then they won't fret about getting address details by whatever means either.
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Indeed. This makes me think a Police report earlier rather than later might be a good idea.
 
Especially if they catch wind of the incidents being logged/reported and want to hush her up or whatever. Report it sooner than later as suggested^^
 
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