Exactly this. They are the most cowards and some do it thinking the women will realize it if they don't.
Domestic violence..
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Exactly this. They are the most cowards and some do it thinking the women will realize it if they don't.
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I'll be honest and say I don't think I've met anyone who fell into that category yet. They're either violent generally or things are much more complicated.
The problem with this conversation is that I have moved from "****ed at the thread for griefing the OP" to "Depressed and angry about the way some men behave". I know you said you feel sorry for the ones who have snapped at a manipulative partner Burnsy, much as I don't think I could every feel sorrow for them, but there must be some that you just want to pound into the ground? How do you stop yourself? I like to think of myself as a level headed guy, but if I had to go into deal with that, I'd want to cuff the guy to the back of the car and go for a fast drive. With a beaten woman in front of me, and a guy who I know will do it again at some point, I'm not sure I could stop myself from giving him a damn good thrashing.
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Whoever grasses this guy up to the police is asking for trouble and wants his family to suffer and die. If you were a real man you'd go sort it out yourself.
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Stop getting life advice from Platinum87.
This really. My ex was in a relationship with someone notoriously violent to men, women and anything else and has done time for doing over both. Weird thing is she still respects the psycho. Stockholm Syndrome.
Call the cops!
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Prevention is usually better than the cure in this case, like mentioned above there usually is other underlying issues especially with the women in regards to thinking she would be worse off out of the dv relationship, and this is the hardest part i've personally experienced.
But things usually tend to get better once somebody steps in, weather it be the police or a social worker, we are seeing an increased trend in the media where these services are being bashed for not stepping in sooner, and the rare but extreme cases of actual murder.
I feel the op had done the right the thing in asking what to do first, especially if this sort of thing has never affected him first hand, I would generally look out for my own family's safety, but with having first hand knowledge I would agree on calling the police and let them do their job, weather anomous or not.
But things usually tend to get better once somebody steps in, weather it be the police or a social worker, we are seeing an increased trend in the media where these services are being bashed for not stepping in sooner, and the rare but extreme cases of actual murder.
I feel the op had done the right the thing in asking what to do first, especially if this sort of thing has never affected him first hand, I would generally look out for my own family's safety, but with having first hand knowledge I would agree on calling the police and let them do their job, weather anomous or not.
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I'll be honest and say it doesn't really occur to me. You always get the nasty pieces of work, but that usually goes ones of two ways: they either don't care about the Police and just get nicked shouting abuse all the way to the van or they kick off in which case your mind is getting them restrained so you don't get injured (not easy in small flats etc). You can't do Police work if you get emotionally engaged in this sort of thing tbh.
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You dont get it do you? they cannot call for help because they are mentally conditioned not to... you have no idea the kind of threats and emotions involved.
While that may be the case, you cannot predict what will happen, at all. It could go either way plus it is much better that the police have a clue as to what is going on, than not.
The main thing here is the child involved, you cant just sit around, do nothing while waiting around for a potential fatal beating.... a wise man once said....
I had noticed a few ignorant and often imbecilic posts by you in the past, but i was willing to give you the benefit of the doubt.... until now. What a ridiculous view to have, what planet are you living on?
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That quote is crap. Neutral doesn't mean that you don't take action.
Call the police and let the idiot know it was you that called them. I ******* hate bullies. I did it myself with a neighbour about 4 years ago. He was arrested and as he was being taken away I opened my door and told him it was me. Police took a statement and I was told I might have to appear in court. When it came to it she didn't turn up and I sat in court for 2 days only to be told he pleaded guilty so I wasn't needed. Didn't see him again afterwards. Bullies are only successful because they rely on the fear of good people.
I can't sit by and listen to it. Especially if youngsters are involved.
I can't sit by and listen to it. Especially if youngsters are involved.
What's that about watching your mouth?
Seems to be you replaced one word for another there fella, and while it's fine and dandy to disagree with my view (formed from experience of getting mixed up with a similar circumstance), you should consider keeping your forked tongue behind your teeth where it belongs and not try and be clever with supplanting words to avoid the moderators and their dislike for four letter words.
Might have been better had you more to say than 'you ******* idiot' but I guess I have the measure of you now eh?
Check out this guys reply below... it differs from mine quite significantly, but it's reasoned and objective, and polite. You could learn something from those methods of thinking and communicating.
I guess you see things from the other side; and in the parlance of the times, acting all big society (this is not a slur against you here) got me a load of trouble along the lines of my first post. For wanting to do the right thing caused more trouble than it was worth. Trouble with the police, social services and local residents and she went back to the man anyway. Some people just don't want to be helped, in my experience. By the time you realise this it's too late to extricate yourself from somebody else's problem and the rubbish they can heap on you.
But that's just my point of view, not an absolute or a means of refuting yours.
Op has certainly got some varying opinions now though
EDIT:
Perhaps a pertinent question should be 'How much are you willing to risk for a stranger who, quite likely, will not thank you for interfering?'
If you're ok with that so much the better, bring on the intervention, if not... it doesn't deserve the vilification evident in some posts here
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Would you prefer if I referred to them as the filth?
Just call them the police tbh.
I guess you see things from the other side; and in the parlance of the times, acting all big society (this is not a slur against you here) got me a load of trouble along the lines of my first post. For wanting to do the right thing caused more trouble than it was worth. Trouble with the police, social services and local residents and she went back to the man anyway. Some people just don't want to be helped in my experience. By the time you realise this it's too late to extricate yourself from somebody else's problem and the rubbish they can heap on you.
But that's just my point of view, not an absolute or a means of refuting yours.
Op has certainly got some varying opinions now though
I guess there is always another side to every story
apparently something like 80% of people who end a violent relationship either go back to them, or move on to another abusive relationship. (thankfully I did neither!)
Its hard to know what anyone will do because everyone takes thigs differently I suppose. I know when it was me I would have liked someone to help me, but then at the same time I was really embarrassed I had gotten into that situation and worried what people would think.
I hid in the house for 4 weeks because I had a fractured cheekbone and didnt want anyone to see. In hindsight i wish i had walked to the local childrens centre where I used to go for playgroups etc and said "help".
But dem pigs are always up in my bidnezz. Innit.
Seriously, pig/filth etc may be cool on the street, and many people on these forums may not always have respct for the policies they have to work with, but I think you will find that the overwelming majority respect the officers themselves. No on will take you seriously when you talk like that.
