Girlfriend doesn't want me to work as a doorman?

If she can't trust you to be a doorman i can't see how she would trust you to go to the gym/supermarket/book store/car wash we all know from porn those lead to sex.

Haha... funnily and strangely enough, I do all of those and she doesn't bat an eye lid. This for some reason has freaked her. She used to work in a bar and apparently "seen things"
 
She is right and you will end up cheating on her in staff toilets.

Worked in bars in the city and they ALL do it. You will too. Sorry that I base this opinion on someone I dont know, but I've seen whats she has seen also.
 
This. Having had a fair few friends working doors and they end up home alone nursing a fat lip / black eye / bruised rubs rather than with some drunken women.

And arrested most likely when things get out of hand or some plonker makes a complaint, cctv doesn't quite catch it and next thing you have a crimminal record. Unless you 'need' the money badly I would avoid like the plague. Go stack shelves in Tesco, better for you.
 
I can understand her reasons for not wanting you to do this but then again seeing drunk women when your sober isn't exactly attractive at all. Her experience working in a bar does explain maybe her perception towards door staff so i wouldn't take it personally. I think it's healthy for her to feel that way. It isn't lack of trust merely not taking anything for granted.
 
I can understand her reasons for not wanting you to do this but then again seeing drunk women when your sober isn't exactly attractive at all. Her experience working in a bar does explain maybe her perception towards door staff. I think it's healthy for her to feel that way. It isn't lack of trust merely not taking anything for granted.

In what way is it not a lack of trust? Surely it's exactly that if she has 'seen what happens' she just expects him to do the same, so no trust.
 
If you have not seen what goes on in the back rooms between doormen and various, hot, gagging for it drunk ladies then I guess you guys just wont understand. It's crazy the ammount of attention the bouncers get, really, crazy.

If I were a girl the very last person I would date would be a bouncer. Really, can totally understand this guys gf's opinion on this.
 
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In what way is it not a lack of trust? Surely it's exactly that if she has 'seen what happens' she just expects him to do the same, so no trust.

Not at all.. She probably does trust him, but it doesn't necessary mean that it stops things going through her mind. I trust my wife and likewise and when she's out i rarely give anything a second thought. However, I'd be lying if i said i had never thought about what she may be up to but as I said, not taking each other for granted is very different from not trusting someone. I think it's good she's been open about how she feels..
 
I've merely glanced over the majority of posts so I do not know if any other forum users actually have any experience of working as a Door Supervisor or not but I do; seven years of working at some of the most notorious venues in Liverpool, student only venues and concerts...

I strongly advise you not to pursue door supervision! You have understand that it is a totally different game now to what the vast majority of people think it is really like one point is it is far more dangerous now than it has ever really been. People chucked out never go quietly and if someone had a problem it would maybe come down to a straightener, those days are long gone and the new order of things can be far more brutal...

You also have to tread incredibly carefully, you are put in to situations where you have a split second to make a decision, which can go either way... if something goes wrong that decision is pulled apart in court and by the police over a period of months and by the way they will throw the book at you, your a "Bouncer" remember that means your a horrible nasty thug who loves to fight and hurt people for no reason other than you can... not that your a decent hard working person struggling to provide some extra income for your family or to pay bills etc

As for the girls, yes you get an unbelievable amount of attention, but that can be disastrous... I've seen colleagues lives ruined through allegations of sexual assaults and rape when girls have been more than willing, and that doesn't just mean because the Doorman has done anything I've seen it happen because some drunken skank has been turned down flat and not liked it...


If your adamant about pursuing this however, make sure you get your license at a good training provider, make sure you start learning some defensive martial art like Krav Maga or Ju Jitsu, start attending the gym at least 3 times a week, make sure you learn some anger management techniques, stock up on your preferred brand of Vodka (Your gonna come home hyped up and unable to switch off) make sure you have a first aid kit, plus medical gloves on you always (Your gonna see some nasty stuff) Get a bucket and some bleach (Hey you have to get the blood, sick and poo off your shirt somehow) Keep a pocket diary on you at all times to jot down any incidents making sure its, dated and signed at all times (Can be a life saver), keep a something handy next to your front door, a pick axe handle is a good choice and bed and finally get very used to praying!


Hope this helps!

***Edit***

Just to add in my seven years I was very lucky, got on the wrong side of a notorious gangster, had knives and even a shooter pulled on me, had at least 6 concussions was only up in court twice as a witness... I came away relatively unscathed and I was considered a very very good doorman, I always preferred to talk situations down.... that doesn't mean that is how it always ends up!
 
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I'm thinking of doing my SIA course and becoming a doorman, just for the extra income really and a bit of security ;) Excuse the terrible pun.

However, she's not so keen on the idea and doesn't want me hanging around drunk girls all night.

I can see her point, but then she should see mine. I'm not going to cheat on her or have any intentions of doing so.

If the roles were reversed. I'd be a little edgy, but I'd soon get over it as I know she wouldn't do anything like that to me, like I wouldn't do to her.

So... what would you do if it was you?

So it's not that she is concerned for your safety, she is worried about you cheaating...


...lol I'd be offended by that and tell her to sort it out, a petty bit of jealousy over something you want to do shouldn't be a limiting factor dude.
 
If you need to ask here and ask her permission, you clearly aren't cut out for being a doorman. Sorry if that sounds blunt, but seriously.
 
I just asked my missus what her first thought would be if I said I was going to become a doorman...when she stopped laughing (:() she said she would be worried for my safety more than anything.

When I read out the thread to her she said that your girlfriends worries wouldn't have entered her head.

Sounds to me like there are few trust issues going on!

However...the fact that you said you could see her point makes me think there is possibly something for her to worry about - I would be outraged if my missus said that to me...agreeing that's a valid way of thinking in any respect is a little worrying.
 
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