Son's Maths teacher openly discussed his exam results with the classroom

Hxc said:
Don't do this. Being forced to do revision will only harbour resentment.
Click to expand...

In the short term, yes.

I've seen kids who are left to their own devices (I was one).

I've seen my nephews and nieces who are pushed (and doing incredibly well).

I've seen other nephews and nieces left to their own devices (not doing so well, but not doing terribly either).

I see nothing wrong with pushing your kids. Obviously you want them to enjoy their lives. But it's better to make your kids work hard and enjoy their free time, than to let them mope about all the time.

In short, do challenge/ push your kids if you want them to achieve their potential. For 95% of kids, there is no other way. Perhaps 5% are able to motivate themselves without help/ pushing.
 
FoxEye said:
In the short term, yes.

I've seen kids who are left to their own devices (I was one).

I've seen my nephews and nieces who are pushed (and doing incredibly well).

I've seen other nephews and nieces left to their own devices (not doing so well, but not doing terribly either).

I see nothing wrong with pushing your kids. Obviously you want them to enjoy their lives. But it's better to make your kids work hard and enjoy their free time, than to let them mope about all the time.

In short, do challenge/ push your kids if you want them to achieve their potential. For 95% of kids, there is no other way. Perhaps 5% are able to motivate themselves without help/ pushing.
Click to expand...

Are sure you mean pushing or encouraging. Pushing kids to attain things is only going to breed resentment and teach them absolutely nothing about self-motivation. Encouraging them places the ball in their court, but with your guidance, to learn their own way to challenge themselves to attain goals. There is a big difference: one will lead to free-thinkers capable of independent motivation, the other however can lead to failure, resentment, reliance and in some cases mental health disorders.
 
Moothead2 said:
Teacher said kid was no longer in that class because he didn't get the grades to other students and he got embarrassed by it for some reason and wanted to formally complain.

Some people said to man up and move on and some said the teacher was out of order.

OPs kid cooled down and decided not to formally complain.

Then it just seemed to turn into an argument of how the Scottish schooling system works. I couldn't be bothered reading on from there and gave up.
Click to expand...

Argument? Funny, I saw three people discussing the Scottish eduation system.

People's perceptions really are strange in OcUK these days I can't help but feel.
 
Xordium said:
Are sure you mean pushing or encouraging. Pushing kids to attain things is only going to breed resentment and teach them absolutely nothing about self-motivation. Encouraging them places the ball in their court, but with your guidance, to learn their own way to challenge themselves to attain goals. There is a big difference: one will lead to free-thinkers capable of independent motivation, the other however can lead to failure, resentment, reliance and in some cases mental health disorders.
Click to expand...

Depends how old the kids are. If we're talking 5-12, then pushing, yes.

Older kids and teenagers need to have their own motivation. But that will come from having been pushed when they were younger.

When you push a young child, you show them what they are capable of. You have to make sure that they succeed. Success breeds success. They will learn what it feels like to achieve. Whether it's playing the violin or being a good reader, or being great at maths, they will learn satisfaction from applying themselves and succeeding.
 
FoxEye said:
Depends how old the kids are. If we're talking 5-12, then pushing, yes.

Older kids and teenagers need to have their own motivation. But that will come from having been pushed when they were younger.

When you push a young child, you show them what they are capable of. You have to make sure that they succeed. Success breeds success. They will learn what it feels like to achieve. Whether it's playing the violin or being a good reader, or being great at maths, they will learn satisfaction from applying themselves and succeeding.
Click to expand...

I disagree with you there I don't think any kid should be pushed. If you feel the need to push them you are not encouraging them in the right manner. Young kids (<5) should be left to their own devices and left to play free.
 
Xordium said:
I disagree with you there I don't think any kid should be pushed. If you feel the need to push them you are not encouraging them in the right manner. Young kids (<5) should be left to their own devices and left to play free.
Click to expand...

From what I've seen (I don't have kids of my own), it would be impossible to encourage an 8 year old boy to do work outside of school :p

You have to accept that they aren't capable of making decisions about their lives yet. They might not "want" to do any work.

That's why you have to make the choice for them. How many kids end up enjoying things they don't "want" to do? A lot. You have to, as the adult, take away the choice of sitting around doing nothing.
 
FoxEye said:
From what I've seen (I don't have kids of my own), it would be impossible to encourage an 8 year old boy to do work outside of school :p

You have to accept that they aren't capable of making decisions about their lives yet. They might not "want" to do any work.

That's why you have to make the choice for them. How many kids end up enjoying things they don't "want" to do? A lot. You have to, as the adult, take away the choice of sitting around doing nothing.
Click to expand...

How on earth is it impossible to stimulate a young mind to do work outside of school or any sort of learning if you present it in the right fashion?

Children make decisions and good decisions about their lives every day at all ages. You seem to think encourage means 'you can do it off you go' whilst you then nip off to read the paper. Encouragement should be both active and supportive. Maybe we are talking about the same thing but using difference definitions.
 
Well as I interpret it, encouragement is a suggestion, but the activity in question is optional.

Whereas pushing would be "it's time for your violin lesson" and the child cannot say "no" under normal circumstances.
 
FoxEye said:
Well as I interpret it, encouragement is a suggestion, but the activity in question is optional.

Whereas pushing would be "it's time for your violin lesson" and the child cannot say "no" under normal circumstances.
Click to expand...

Which is therefore punitive in nature. Not a good thing. I would expect my children to question why they should be performing violin lessons - I would expect them to want to actually do music lessons in an instrument that interests them - what music do they like - how can they reproduce it. The encouragement would revolve around enabling them to experiment with what they enjoy and therefore will pursue more actively whether that be piano, guitar or a copy of Fruity Loops. Music lessons are hardly cheap and hardly going to be continued in a child forced to do them and if they are on what cost to the child. Encouragement does not have to be optional. Pushing may well never be accepted and therefore the activity is performed less.
 
I think you're asking a lot there if you think an 8 year old would understand why it's good to work hard and have a routine. Most 8 year olds just want to play XBox or run around in the park.

I guess we'll have to agree to disagree. All I'm saying, is that I've had an opportunity to observe different methods of parenting with my brothers/sisters kids, and I'm now starting to see them transition into adults.

The ones who were pushed are in a better place, I think.
 
Biohazard said:
Try reading things properly then, this seems to be a major issue with OcUK these days it would seem. Partly why discussion here is so pointless.

:)
Click to expand...

Fair enough. I just skim read the first few posts between you and the other guy and got bored and left. I though since this was GD after about a page of posts it probably turned into an argument and put that down in the summary :p. No offence was meant in the creation of that post :).
 
Moothead2 said:
Fair enough. I just skim read the first few posts between you and the other guy and got bored and left. I though since this was GD after about a page of posts it probably turned into an argument and put that down in the summary :p. No offence was meant in the creation of that post :).
Click to expand...

No offense was taken, it just becomes quite frustrating particularly in a thread littered with it.

:D :)
 
FoxEye said:
I think you're asking a lot there if you think an 8 year old would understand why it's good to work hard and have a routine. Most 8 year olds just want to play XBox or run around in the park.

I guess we'll have to agree to disagree. All I'm saying, is that I've had an opportunity to observe different methods of parenting with my brothers/sisters kids, and I'm now starting to see them transition into adults.

The ones who were pushed are in a better place, I think.
Click to expand...

Maybe you'll change your mind when you have your own kids. Those 8 years old who just want to play Xbox maybe haven't had things explained in the right way and been encouraged in the right way. Maths can be so dry at times but the trajectory of sniper bullets and working out deflection angles can quite appeal to boys. Chemistry is fun when things go bang and most discoveries that are made rather than shown stick in the memory far more readily. One thing I noticed with my kids was that they would push themselves further with encouragement than I what I would have set them. Like all of life's lessons these things need to be started from the off whether they be learning, self-direction, good exercise or good nutrition. Don't kiddify explanations open them up to a very interesting universe from the off and you'll have their interest for life.
 
Life is hard, he can think himself lucky school actually showed him part of that hardship of life instead of the constant nannying schools do these days. "Everyone is a winner" etc.
 
Sin_Chase said:
Failure is.

He failed, luckily it was on an exam which in the grand scheme of things means nothing at all. Slightly different later on in life.
Click to expand...

He did not fail though. He got a lower result than possible, yet overall done well in his exams apparently.

The problem wasn't with his test result itself either. Nor was any of this hardship.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top Bottom