Debenhams renames coffee.

lol, yup!

Generally speaking, filter coffee is the hardest to go wrong, you basically put the grind it and press a button and machine does the rest, where with an espresso if you press down too hard on the "tamper" (the tool that you use to press grind into the portafilter) and compact it too much, the coffee may take too long to go through and it will taste burnt. If the water passes too quick it will taste weak. It is not an exact science per say but it should take between 25 to 30 seconds to fill a double espresso. What also can alter that timing is the beans used (hence shops tends to stick with the same beans so they don't need to adjust the setting on the grinder), some beans need to be ground finer than others, and the pressure you press down will have a big effect on how water passes through it. Because of this, when I make it at home, whenever I put in a new bag of beans, the first couple of cups it often goes wrong. Sometimes the grind is too fine that no water passes through the machine at all so I have to bin that and dial down the grinder and try again. I could stick with the same beans and never have to adjust the settings but that's the fun part of coffee, there are a millions different beans out there and trying them out is like trying different types of beers or wine.

So, filter coffee is the easiest to make and if the pot is fresh, and you want an Americano type drink, think about having a filtered coffee instead. It is often cheaper too. Plus a latte is quite calorific, a cup of Americano/Filter coffee with no milk is less than 10cal per mug. A Starbucks Grande (medium) Egg nog latte is like 450cal, add a muffin to that you are looking at more energy than a quarter pounder burger.

This also explains a little why it cost as much as they are. Sure, coffee isn't worth £3 a drink…not materially no, but if made with the correct amount of attention and detail and made right, you are paying for the "expertise" and it taste a million times better than your Nescafe instant. What I find funny is when people ask for tea in coffee shops, you are not paying it for the labour or materials, they don't even add milk in for you, they only put in hot water and charges you £2.
 
I hate it when I'm forced to ask for an "americano" because the barista feigns ignorance at my request for a standard coffee.

"Just a coffee please"

"latte? cappuccino? americano?"

*sigh*.. "Americano.. Large"

"grande?"

":("

Edit: though some of these name changes are just descriptions of the drink. Why not put the description under the name, if people are having trouble?

This annoys the bejeesus out of me. While I know what I want is a Mocha, others don't really care if they get a Latte or Americano. Anyone that wants a Cappuccino knows what it is. And like you say, they have descriptions anyway.

What can actually make me just leave a coffee shop is:
"Large Mocha with a shot of hazelnut please"
"Do you mean grande?"

No, I mean ****** large. Mocha, Cappuccino? Fair enough, they are the names of the types of coffee. But "large"? We have a word for "large" in English, its large!
 
This annoys the bejeesus out of me. While I know what I want is a Mocha, others don't really care if they get a Latte or Americano. Anyone that wants a Cappuccino knows what it is. And like you say, they have descriptions anyway.

What can actually make me just leave a coffee shop is:
"Large Mocha with a shot of hazelnut please"
"Do you mean grande?"

No, I mean ****** large. Mocha, Cappuccino? Fair enough, they are the names of the types of coffee. But "large"? We have a word for "large" in English, its large!


Starbucks

Tall = Small
Grange = Medium
Venti = Large

But in relation to size to Cafe Nero.

Tall = medium
Grande = Large

Cafe Nero do not have a cup as large as Starbuck's Venti.

Costa just says Small/Medium/Large.
 
I hate it when I'm forced to ask for an "americano" because the barista feigns ignorance at my request for a standard coffee.

"Just a coffee please"

"latte? cappuccino? americano?"

*sigh*.. "Americano.. Large"

"grande?"

":("

I hate when I get verbal diarrhoea and all I want is large black coffee. Then they look at you as thought you have landed from mars.
 
Ray, a Machiato is espresso with a touch of froth on top where as a Flat White is best described as a very small but strong latte made with textured milk & slowly poured so the espresso crema is intact on top, it can technically only be bought in Australia because it uses a very high protein milk than you can only get there. It is because of the protein in the milk that you can get various textures of milk. If you find somewhere that does good ones then you'll see thet are not similar at all :)
 
This thread has just reaffirmed why Debenhams have done this! :p

The job titles are just as quack in some of the high street shops "barista" :rolleyes: didnt know we were now in Italy....
 
what if i want a turkish coffee

whats wrong with using the english names anyway? im getting tired of people trying to use foreign words to fool the stupid into believing its some magical item imported and fully authentic from the streets of milan or wherever

brb need to have my brunch :rolleyes: (people must have got this crap from watching the bodyguard as opposed to actually living in america for long enough to learn there customs)
 
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Maybe Larry David is their new advisor...

I don't quite "get" larry david in cye, I'm a fan but I've never quite understood his character.

It is a character as he is exaggerating how he is irl. But he just seems almost retarded sometimes with how he blows every single situation out of proportion, even trivial stuff like ordering a coffee.

I know thats the whole point. And I guess the point is its actually not trivial anymore to order a coffee.

But I just got tired of him in cye and had to stop watching it.
 
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what if i want a turkish coffee

whats wrong with using the english names anyway? im getting tired of people trying to use foreign words to fool the stupid into believing its some magical item imported and fully authentic from the streets of milan or wherever

If you think about it, we don't have any english words for the most common coffee drinks other than...coffee. All Debenhams have dine is changed the names their coffee to simplr english descriptions.
 
How far do you go?



Pork sausage in really really lots of really really crispy home made paper mache glue.

"saw-sidge"? What is this "saw-sidge" you speak of?

Oh, you mean ground pig meat mixed with some bread/rusk (flour mixed with yeast, salt, sugar and water then baked in an oven), and herbs and then stuffed into animal stomach lining?

So basically the full name for toad in the hole would be:

Baked egg, flour, salt, milk and water with a cylinder of ground pig meat mixed with some bread/rusk (flour mixed with yeast, salt, sugar and water then baked in an oven), and herbs and then stuffed into animal stomach lining.

****ing idiots. We have words for these things for a reason. :rolleyes:
 
This is a good move in my opinion. Hopefully it will remove the artificial exclusivity that these stupid names convey. People might also start to wonder why they are paying so much for a cup of hot water and a tiny amount of beans. All we need to do now is get people to understand that starbucks offer so many additional flavourings to hide the **** poor quality of their coffee. Yeah I'll have a pumpkin caramel latte please because I'm trendy and love coffee so much. No, your a numpty thats buying pish coffee with enough sugar and artificial junk to either give you diabetes or cancer.
 
I do actually. It's amazing what a good rant can do :)

Funnily enough I now really fancy a skinny, lak milk, peruvian, pooped out by a lima, dark roast mocha with nutmeg.
 
And I think Latte is an English choice of word. Ask for a latte in Italy get you milk and nothing I believe.

This happened to my brother. He ordered a latte in italy and thought it was the best coffee he'd ever tasted until he was told that he was just drinking warm milk.
 
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