Losing contact with mates who have girlfriends/wives/kids

Wait till you have kids and watch your social life disappear. You will not get a say in it unless you have an infinite supply of baby sitters.

"Friends" who get ***** over that can sod off. My kids are worth far more than some self-centred arse who thinks I should prioritise seeing them over providing for my family.
 
Hellsmk2 said:
Wait till you have kids and watch your social life disappear. You will not get a say in it unless you have an infinite supply of baby sitters.

"Friends" who get ****y over that can sod off. My kids are worth far more than some self-centred arse who thinks I should prioritise seeing them over providing for my family.
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He has said housemate, so I'd assume that he might not have wife/kids.

Kids come first, I'd understand that perfectly, but as in the example a good friends birthday or girlfriends friends house party? Mates win that one easily.
 
Been there, done that. Kids come first no matter what. If a friend doesn't understand that then they were never a true friend.
 
Guest2 said:
My housemate is sacking off one of our friends 30th birthdays that he has known for around 7 years. He has known about it for a couple of months and yesterday said he was going to his girlfriends mates house-party instead.

I said "what, you are sacking off your mates 30th to go to your birds friends house-party" He then went to his room and I didn't see him for the rest of the night - must have touched a nerve

Some friends are married with kids but still find time to go on occasional nights out, reply to texts even if its a simple yes or no, im busy reply. Others I dont hear from for ages then get a random text "you out tonight mate?" presumably when their Mrs is off out and they can go out too!

When I had a girlfriend I didn't stop contacting my friends, not show up for big events or ditch things for plans with her at the last minute

This happening to others?
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Quick question, what the hell is sacking off? At the moment I am assuming a typo of sucking.
 
It depends on the person, my best of 10 years is married with 2 kids. We see each other twice a week, I go to his and he comes to mine. This never changed throughout our friendship. Whenever he has a family event, such as an party, BBQ, get together. He always invites me.

Another best friend of mine who I have known for over 20 years has just become a dad for the first time with his fiancée of 3 years. He has moved away but still within driving distance, every few days he calls or texts to see how I am. Again, his fiancée's family are always having parties etc and I am always invited and expect to go. These 2 are my friends for life and have proven this to me when I went through a bad patch a few years back.

Girlfriends, wives or kids, there is absolutely no excuses to push out your friends when you settle down or find a new partner. When you are older and things start going wrong in your life which you may not have control over, you will need your friends there to support you. If you turn your back on them, then you have will no one and grow up to be a very lonely person.

Boyfriend and girlfriends come and go but friends are there for life....so keep them and don't let go.
 
Monserrat said:
Not so much with the gf/wives thing, but I can concur when it comes to kids. As soon as they pop one out, they disappear off the face of the planet. Have lost a few friends this way even though I have tried to remain in contact.
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Same here. Its the whole childcare/ babysitter issue. Pretty much all my friends have gone this route. Still, lots of babysitters when Me and my missus pop em out!
 
That feel when you type out a massive post, and your wifi account thingy times out. **** :mad: Not doing it again :p
 
Bear in mind, the housemate might have put up a fight to do what he wanted initially, gotten a load of grief off the Mrs and backed down to keep the peace. I can relate to that:

A couple of years ago, my then gf wanted me to go to a friend of her's birthday party that had been postponed by more than a month from her actual birthday to the Saturday of the weekend of my birthday celebrations. Now, for complicated reasons, two of my very best friends fell out and one won't countenance being in the same room as the other ever again, therefore I was planning on doing something with one best friend on the Friday (along with some others) and the other best friend on the Saturday (again, with others).

My then-gf refused to understand why I had to keep the friends separate, insisted that she was going to her friend's (postponed) birthday party on the Sat and was pretty adamant that she wanted me to go with her, regardless of the fact that it was my actual birthday weekend and should be allowed first call on what's happening. I refused to back down. Things came to a head at a friend's wedding shortly before the date and was the straw that broke the camel's back in the relationship and we split.

All I'm saying is it's not right but I have some sympathy for the guy as women (can) be crazy...
 
Been with my missus just over a year. She is really homely and on the most part brilliant and does live with me.

However she really wants to do everything with me, even to the point of trying to come out when I want to meet up with a friend for a drink. To which tantrums ensue.

I genuinely think it is healthy for both people in the relationship to have a social life without the need to have their partner there. Sometimes you just need to be away from the partner before you feel the need to go bonkers. It is a real shame if people don't keep in contact, having a girlfriend is not the be all and end all.

Having children is definitely a game changer though!
 
I don't really get any of the negative aspects people are suggesting.

It's all about balancing your life/work/other commitments - there are only so many hours in a week, and you can't go to everything.

Sometimes I go out with friends, sometimes I do things with my other half, and sometimes I go and do things with my parents with or without each other, and sometimes with one another.

People have their own lives and people's lives change as do their priorities. The friends that are worth keeping are the ones that will be there when you need them.
 
Seen women try to make their men act like retirees, and you know what we say? Not today.

Just unrelenting, get the ****er out. The moment you ditch your social life for your missus, thats when your life might as well be over.

I would know, I was there "No you aren't going down the pub" well I am, cue the argument followed by me going down the pub anyway and her having a blub because 6 days a week with her isn't enough.

I do at times enjoy the single life now I have to say, my penis may be flaccid and unused but at least I don't have a woman to answer to.
 
Beta males with unresolved oedipus complexes pull this ******** all the time. They seem to love to pseudo-moan about being dominated by her indoors. My best friend from school loved to sack off all spheres of life when he was going out with his girl friend, only to reappear when the girl was at home with family for the weekend or once she broke up with him.
 
Children are the biggest game changer as its not practical to get regular babysitters and nor is it practical to have a massive night out when baby Jimmy is going to be bouncing around at 6am
 
MisChief said:
My friends are like that... But their boyfriends/husbands.

"Sorry I can't go out next Thursday, it's date night with <insert husbands name>!"... Err yeah. You're married and live together with no kids.... Surely there's plenty of other opportunities for 'date night' :rolleyes:
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I'm free. You and I, Date night?
 
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