I've always thought £15-20k is a good aim for a good diamond for an engagement ring. It's not just a ring at the end of the day because it's something that holds value in different ways and jewellery is always passed down, should the children or grandchildren suffer any financial hardship, it's something that could always be sold.
Engagement Ring, Wedding & Saving House Deposit?
- Thread starter Mr Jones
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Could put a deposit on a house for that!
This is true and it really depends on your situation as to what is financially sensible. £15-20k on a ring would be presuming there's already a substantial deposit put down for a house.
For what it's worth I went through this exact same process over the last couple of years.
My wife has wanted to get married for the last 3 years or so, initially I pushed back against it, for what were basically very juvenile reasons: perceived loss of "freedom", scared of being married and grown up etc. I eventually manned up and proposed in Canada, February 2012. We got married in France in June of 2013 and bought our first house with a 15% deposit in December 2013.
It has been an expensive and very stressful couple of years, but has defiintely been worth it. I pretty much had no savings in early 2012, but was fortunate enough to get on a project that paid me plenty of overtime. The overtime and a timely, but rare bonus paid for the engagement ring, and started me off with a little bit of savings, so I guess I was lucky in that respect. After that we both started saving hard for both the wedding and a house.
It was doable, but fairly tight. Certainly a house is one of the most important things in the current climate as you don't really want to pay someone rent if you can pay off a mortgage.
However; weddings are also very important if that's what you belive in. It's an experience you will never forget and will be reminded of every day if you have photos up around the house. A wedding can't really have a monetary value as it always pays back with memories. A new car or TV just fades into obsoletion, but memories of a great wedding day will stay for ever and actually get better as you end up rose tinting it as time goes on! It's also something that you have shared with friends and family and it's something they will love and they will remember also.
I would just get the debt paid off, and get the engagement ring out of the way. You've then bought yourself plenty of time as you have demonstrated your commitment with a "statement of intent" so to speak. Then you can both pool your cash on the wedding pot and the house deposit.
Without wanting to appear mercenary - some wedding guests are very generous. You could always ask for cash for a house deposit rather than items from a gift list for wedding gifts. That's pretty much what we did and it covered almost half of the cost of the wedding.
Try not to put artificial "must do this before I'm XX years old" time limits on things, it's just unnecessary pressure on yourself. Just do stuff when you're ready. Good luck! It'll be a tough but enjoyable ride (provided she says yes!).
My wife has wanted to get married for the last 3 years or so, initially I pushed back against it, for what were basically very juvenile reasons: perceived loss of "freedom", scared of being married and grown up etc. I eventually manned up and proposed in Canada, February 2012. We got married in France in June of 2013 and bought our first house with a 15% deposit in December 2013.
It has been an expensive and very stressful couple of years, but has defiintely been worth it. I pretty much had no savings in early 2012, but was fortunate enough to get on a project that paid me plenty of overtime. The overtime and a timely, but rare bonus paid for the engagement ring, and started me off with a little bit of savings, so I guess I was lucky in that respect. After that we both started saving hard for both the wedding and a house.
It was doable, but fairly tight. Certainly a house is one of the most important things in the current climate as you don't really want to pay someone rent if you can pay off a mortgage.
However; weddings are also very important if that's what you belive in. It's an experience you will never forget and will be reminded of every day if you have photos up around the house. A wedding can't really have a monetary value as it always pays back with memories. A new car or TV just fades into obsoletion, but memories of a great wedding day will stay for ever and actually get better as you end up rose tinting it as time goes on! It's also something that you have shared with friends and family and it's something they will love and they will remember also.
I would just get the debt paid off, and get the engagement ring out of the way. You've then bought yourself plenty of time as you have demonstrated your commitment with a "statement of intent" so to speak. Then you can both pool your cash on the wedding pot and the house deposit.
Without wanting to appear mercenary - some wedding guests are very generous. You could always ask for cash for a house deposit rather than items from a gift list for wedding gifts. That's pretty much what we did and it covered almost half of the cost of the wedding.
Try not to put artificial "must do this before I'm XX years old" time limits on things, it's just unnecessary pressure on yourself. Just do stuff when you're ready. Good luck! It'll be a tough but enjoyable ride (provided she says yes!).
Errrrr... My wife would have given a 20k ring back to me and said don't be so stupid, that's most of a house deposit and more than the wedding. She wouldn't want to walk around with a 20k ring knowing that we were saving hard for a house.
Well, a few religious types maybe, outside of that give me a purpose to marriage? I mean a real, useful one.
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Some people just like to be bonded (either religiously or legally) to one another. It's a significant commitment. I'll admit having offspring is an even bigger commitment, but personally I'd always want to make sure that a stable base is formed first, for me, marriage is where that base is built from.
There is no right or wrong answer to this.
I'm clearly not going to be able to give you a useful purpose.
Like I said, to some people there is a purpose. My wife wanted to get married because she wanted to show other people the commitment we'd made. She isn't religious in the slightest.
You're like a broken record.
Wow, some flash-money flying around here. 3x monthly salary sounds pretty excessive to me. I paid equivalent to a full months salary after tax. She was more than made up with that and my wife loves expensive things. I suppose it's less about the monetary value and more about taking the time to choose the right one.
Its insanely hard to do all 3 at once......
I have just done the Engagement and the House purchase, refurbing the house and its just money money money.
Literally 12months of just salary in..... salary out lol. Thats even before the wedding, I would say be realistic about your incomes and take it a step at a time, the wedding can always wait.
I have just done the Engagement and the House purchase, refurbing the house and its just money money money.
Literally 12months of just salary in..... salary out lol. Thats even before the wedding, I would say be realistic about your incomes and take it a step at a time, the wedding can always wait.
No need to worry about having a great huge wedding. I married my lovely this summer, we only wanted to have a small family wedding but it was absolutely lovely! You can also get amazing diamond engagement rings on amazon for a third of the high street price. I got my lady's ring off there for about 1100 quid and it is a bobby dazzler. Platinum 0.5 carat vvs1 
cant recommended diamond manufacturers enough
http://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/aw/d/B0038UBK9Y/ref=mp_s_a_1_2?qid=1389120563&sr=8-2&pi=AC_SX110_SY165
cant recommended diamond manufacturers enoughhttp://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/aw/d/B0038UBK9Y/ref=mp_s_a_1_2?qid=1389120563&sr=8-2&pi=AC_SX110_SY165
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and your rich
*You're
But you are right, the average person is not going to spend £20k on a ring, especially if that's considered a good deposit for a house, presuming you are putting down 30% deposit, the house isn't exactly going to be a nice one.
It is interesting though, the average person might well be happy spending £25k on a new car which will depreciate by at least £10k in 3 years, whereas a £10k diamond will hold its value. It's just the perspective you place on such things.
