Is this a deal with the devil or a genuine opportunity for more time with my kids?

glen8 said:
All my posts in this thread are utterly irrelevant
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Fixed that for you.


No that would be your post, how can you even be ignorant enough to say its irrelevant if you read the full story or not?

Even the guy above agrees your input is crap.
 
so what if she is using you? you gets extra time with the kids

if someone has a hidden agenda who I do not care about, why would that bother me?

use everything to your advantage, and good luck!
 
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glen8 said:
so what if she is using you? you gets extra time with the kids

if someone has a hidden agenda who I do not care about, why would that bother me?

use everything to your advantage, and good luck!
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Because when that hidden agenda turns nasty there's a very good chance the OP will end up in a worse off place that he is now? Also the fact that he shouldn't let someone take him for a 'ride' and have some self respect.
 
glen8 said:
so what if she is using you? you gets extra time with the kids

if someone has a hidden agenda who I do not care about, why would that bother me?

use everything to your advantage, and good luck!
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Because while he may get to spend more time with his kids this could also leave him open to being stuck on the dole queue forever and at the beck and call of his crazy ex.
If he goes through with this he is basically putting his life and choices into his ex's hands as she'll have him by the short and curlys.
 
dont be wishful thinking just cause you had an hour of laughs with your ex. you broke up for a reason and sometimes people canm work it out but often than not you just create another explosion around your kids, which upsets them more.


i can have laughs with my ex, if i didn t we would never have been together. but when shes bad shes evil, and that i can never forgive her for because thats realistically who she will always be

i wouldnt be moving though at her demand. let her go to uni. go to court and demand yourself more access legally based upon her being at uni and you being able to have them whilst she is. then seek reduced csa due to the more time you have with them
 
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Whilst you want to do well by your kids the best thing for your kids would be to get a job and be able to financially support yourself and them and be able to support them as they grow older.

This is manipulation pure and simple, get a job and sort your life out then support as best you can rather than destroying all potential in your life for short term gain.
 
Vidar what ever you do decide to do think long and hard about it don't just jump in to this, if you end up caring for the children for more than 3day's a week I would be looking at getting half the tax credits ect to help pay for the up keep

I know it's hard for you as you just want to be there for the kid's but don't become a full time door step for her to just use as and when she needs you

p.s as soon as I get a box I will ship those parts out for you
 
You must realise that she is using you.... Re read the op!!!!
What a horrible person to use her own kids like this. And buttering you up on the phone for an hour.... Wow true bitch!!!
Unfortunately you still care for her or you wouldn't have posted here!!
 
dottty27 said:
don't become a full time door step for her to just use as and when she needs you
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Its a crap situation ill still stand by saying what i said originally, even though it is being walked over.

Im sure there are plenty of happy marriages where one partner gets the kids dumped on them at a whim.

Theres nothing stopping them working out a decent schedule anyway.
 
I for one look forward to Vidar's catastrophic decision to move back to the town, agree to take the kids full-time, get nothing in writing, and see the ex not pay a penny of his debts.
 
No way I'd do it. I'm all for getting more kid time, honestly, but I can't see this as ending well. Glen's obviously not thinking bigger picture. Yes, more time with the kids, but able to provide for them? No, won't be able to have his own life as it will basically doing what she wants so she can have a life.
Your kids are so very important, but providing them a life and you having a life is also a part of that too.
 
Vidar, why are you even considering letting this woman 'pay for your debts', thereby giving her a hold over you you will not be able to extricate yourself from?

Whilst moving closer will (maybe...) allow you to have more time with your kids, it will also bring you closer into her sphere of influence. Add that to willingly holding yourself in thrall to her financially... Is that really a place you want to be?

You should be taking care of business and sorting yourself out, not allowing yourself be manipulated to someone elses advantage.

With the carrot to the stick being 'you get to see the kids more', the stick, when it comes, will be one you cannot mitigate or avoid.
 
See a lawyer or at last the CSA. Talk this out with someone who knows the law. It might be possible from what you say to get the kids full time which would mean you stop paying CSA and get all the child benefit.

(Apologies if your original thread explains why that isn't an option)
 
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