The OcUK Relationship Counselling and Hugs Thread

Think so - I always avoid. It is boarded up, but it's usually got a few people in if I come back from London in the evenings. Doesn't seem like the most welcoming of places!
 
haha i found out something funny today someone i used to date would always (like at least once a week) accuse me of cheating or be lying about where i am or who im with etc. It used to drive me insane as its ****ing difficult proving your not lying about something utterly made up an the fights used to go on for ages.

turns out pretty much the whole time we were together they were shagigng around behind my back.

Don't know why but it just made me laugh my ass off.
 
[FnG]magnolia;26929876 said:
How do you feel?
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couldn't care less tbh.


But i suppose its relieved all the guilt i felt when broke up got lots of "omg I'm going to kill myself, you've ruined my life, i loved you with all my heart" style messages when i ended.

now i know it was all ******** and i don't have to feel bad.
 
How do those of you deal with your own insecurities and and feelings of jealousy in relationships? Had a situation present itself which has brought this out in me when I thought I was pretty easy going and not the jealous type.
 
Soo I'm completely screwed.

Been dating this girl for eight months now, moved into a flat together at the start of last month. Things have been going from good to better every week. Last night she sat me down and told me she is three weeks late...

So I have spent the entire day panicking, there is no way on earth that I can afford to raise a child and she doesn't want to consider a abortion. I'm not sure I want to force her to have one as I feel it will drive us apart.

My current job doesn't pay much only £24k plus a ¼ bonus. Most of which gets swallowed by rent/bills and paying of a loan for a private healthcare operation. My job has no overtime and I can't remember the last time I got a pay rise.

I am currently sticking with this job as they allow me day release for attending a university course to upgrade my hnd.

I have applied for another job that pays significantly more money (circa 38k+ overtime) but isn't a maintenance role and won't allow me to attend university.

So basically should I give a job which interests me and allows me to progress in the future (2 years) for a decent wage?
 
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Abraxaz1 said:
My current job doesn't pay much only £24k plus a ¼ bonus. Most of which gets swallowed by rent/bills and paying of a loan for a private healthcare operation. My job has no overtime and I can't remember the last time I got a pay rise.
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you earn circa £25k and you can't afford to raise a child?

are you hooked on cocaine?
 
TheMeekon said:
I was thinking the same, when my son was born I was on a junior wage of 19k and we did alright.

Does she work?
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Yeah, things will be tight, but it's doable.

She may work now, but she probably wont in circa 9 months.

It all becomes about there being someone more/just as important as you in the world to look after for a few years.
 
cm1179 said:
you earn circa £25k and you can't afford to raise a child?

are you hooked on cocaine?
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I guess it depends what you want for your child. Giving them a great education (very rare in the state sector), cultural enrichment, a healthy lifestyle and not curtailing your own life to zero are not possible on £25k unless as parents you have the skills and time to provide all of that.
 
PMKeates said:
I guess it depends what you want for your child. Giving them a great education (very rare in the state sector), cultural enrichment, a healthy lifestyle and not curtailing your own life to zero are not possible on £25k unless as parents you have the skills and time to provide all of that.
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i agree it depends on what you want for your child. a private education is out of reach for most parents but £25k is enough to give a child a very good urbinging aslong as the parents make sacrifices in their own life which surely is what being a parent is all about.
 
cm1179 said:
i agree it depends on what you want for your child. a private education is out of reach for most parents but £25k is enough to give a child a very good urbinging aslong as the parents make sacrifices in their own life which surely is what being a parent is all about.
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I think if you want a fairly empty adult life and a fairly basic life for your child, being a parent on £25k is fine. My parents were far from well off, but then they had no lives at all and I had very little in the way of cultural exposure because they couldn't afford it.
 
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