Shop him for being a paedo
I know you said this as a joke, But its not exactly something people should do when they know the chaps not. Even just Accusing someone can ruin their life for good.
Shop him for being a paedo
IMO Parents are doing a terrible job of it these days. Kids being bad isn't entirely their own fault, it's just the way they were raised. Now back in the day (last century) you had discipline...

Yeah kids didn't do anything wrong in the last century did they.
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I got into all sorts of minor scrapes when I were a lad and vividly remember being shown the error of my ways by teachers, the local beat bobby and my parents.
This was back when all of the above were allowed to provide a short contact counselling session when a verbal reprimand didn't effectively discourage bad behaviour.
He's a moron.
People are generally morons.