Buying a house with girlfriend ?

[Skeeter]

Deed of Trust/Declaration if Trust is designed to handle exactly this.

You define who provided the deposit, how the ownership of the house is split and how responcibility of the mortgage debt/payments are split.

The purchase fell through, but recently we just drew one up. My GF provided all the deposit which was stated financially and as 7%. Ownership of the house was therefore 53.5%/46.5%, but the responcibility for mortgage payments was defined as 50%/50%.

You can basically slice it however you want, and its a petty common thing that your conveyancor will send you details on.

 

[dowie]

If you own 1/5th outright, you get 20% back, the remainder split 50/50 no?

So in your example you would get 20k back, the other 2k would be split 50/50.

If I was buying with someone with no deposit, that is what I would do I think.

that isn't what the poster said - he said he had an agreement with a 60/40 split...

 

[dowie]

My (now) wife and I got a deed of trust drawn up by the solicitors handling the house purchase. I think it cost around £300.

Our trust deed simply said percentage of money in (deposit + mortgage payments to date) equals percentage of money out when the property is sold.

Obviously now that we're married, it's no longer valid.

that would seem to be the fairest approach IMO

 

[Squark]

That was my thought, but she's absolutely rubbish at saving up.

Why?

Personally I would want her to prove that she's financially responsible enough for a house first, by budgeting and making a track of her money for a period of time. Before committing to any house purchase, otherwise I'd be wanting the home in my name only if I'm supplying all the capital.

 

[Blackjack Davy]

I would pay full deposit and have it in my name, and my name only.

This. Mother lived with a bloke for years until he became an arse and she kicked him out. As it was in her name only (she put up the money) and they weren't married he was left with no stake in the house at all...

 

[Richdog]

Hi,

Been saving for a house for me and my girlfriend for about 1 year now and I've managed to save nearly all the deposit all by my self!! But my girlfriend hasn't saved anything yet!!

I love her absolute millions but just a little confused has she also really really wants to move out.

What's you thoughts on the situation would you just pay the full deposit or would you make her save up ? hahahaha

Just buy the house yourself and don't let her have any ownership, and make her pay fixed rent. If she hasn't started saving for something you both agreed needs saving for then it is going to end in disaster, trust me on that.

^^^^This works.

Its just money?
If you love her then whats the odds?
Money is easy to find and make, true love aint.

Money is not everything, I can assure you.

Ahh, classic Itchy romanticising in la-la-land... you're very lucky you've managed to maintain these naieve notions up until this point, but I'm waiting for the post where one day you do get screwed over and your perspective changes to one of realism.

 

[easyrider]

Are you mad OP?

Buy the house yourself.

If she really wants to commit then she should be able to curb her spending.

This has disaster all over it.

Man, things are so complex nowadays. My wife and don't have any notion of a split or share of contribution to anything. Everything we have is pooled as it is jointly ours, doesn't matter who brought it in.

Thats fine until the SHTF

This can also happen at any time. My older sisters best friend married for over 30 years three lovely boys, house, car , holidays all the money under the sun....A couple people would talk about at BBQ's how solid they were how in love they were...


BOOM out the Blue...DIVORCE

I was even shocked !

The OP GF can't even get of her lazy butt to focus on saving for a deposit. Really mature outlook on what is the biggest thing most people do in their lives.

 

[Skidder]

my wife saves more than I and our deposit will be paid mostly by her
I saved 1/4th of what she did...but then I buy most food and pay most of the bills

Keyword here is wife

 

[nono]

The best way to solve this problem is negotiation,then do what you want to do ,follow your heart .

 

[Spook187]

Our house is 50/50 even though i pay just about 100% of everything due to the Mrs having long term illness, were a team through thick and thin, i wouldn't dream of looking at my Mrs as a lodger.

 

[peige]

I'd buy the house alone and then let her lodge. If she can't budget to save then I doubt she can budget to pay the mortgage.
If you do go ahead (which no doubt you will as love makes people stupid) then open a joint account and both pay into it, all bills come out of the joint. Get a solicitor to draw up an agreement on the split of ownership taking into account your deposit. Hope it all goes well.
Keep your own personal account too for your wages to go into before DD'ing across to the joint.

 

[BuffetSlayer]

Alarm bells would be sounding for me.

Sounds like she is selfish and/or flakey, neither of which is a good trait when entering into important financial decisions.

Also, I'm sorry, but if you are with this person and intending to buy a house then what she does with her money is absolutely your business if she isn't keeping up her end of the deal.

Personally, I wouldn't even entertain the thought of buying with her if she isn't pulling her weight with saving for the deposit.

 

[MikeTheNative]

Sometimes there are genuine reasons why one partner may put in more money than the other, this isn't one of them. She needs to do some growing up before getting her own house.

 

[Semple]

It does sound like you're both not ready to purchase a house yet.

How long have you been together? If neither of you can discuss your financial affairs, then it's obvious you're not ready. If you've both agreed to save 25% of your salary for a house deposit, and she's only saving 10%, then you need to talk about where the other 15% is going.

Do you earn a lot more than she does? - This might explain why you'd have a larger share of the deposit.

Me and the GF have been saving for a deposit for 3+ years, myself a little longer, so i have about 70% of the deposit, however i do earn 40% more than her, so i expect to pay a larger share of the deposit. If i insisted on her getting to 50%, then we'd have to wait several more years, all the while i'd have a savings pot building, just wouldn't make sense.

 

[DAIR]

If she wants to own half the house she needs to pay half the deposit.

Agreed. If things turn sour between you. You'll regret it.

Makes me wonder how serious she's been taking the relationship....

 

[Frozennova]

I'm in a similar situation, although with my girlfriend having the majority share of this deposit so to speak.

We discussed it at length and decided that I would split the payments 50/50 and I would overpay each month to even the split in equity. If the worst should happen then I'll take it like a man and we'll split the equity so we get what is rightly ours back

 

[FirebarUK]

Are you mad OP?

Buy the house yourself.

If she really wants to commit then she should be able to curb her spending.

This has disaster all over it.





Thats fine until the SHTF

This can also happen at any time. My older sisters best friend married for over 30 years three lovely boys, house, car , holidays all the money under the sun....A couple people would talk about at BBQ's how solid they were how in love they were...


BOOM out the Blue...DIVORCE

I was even shocked !

The OP GF can't even get of her lazy butt to focus on saving for a deposit. Really mature outlook on what is the biggest thing most people do in their lives.

IMHO "keeping things separate" is a mentality which doesn't have a place in marriage. Sure, I certainly know things can and do go wrong but I'd rather be all-in, taking things seriously and committing mutually (even in finance) than hedging my bets.

Just can't imagine it any other way, I guess you have to find someone like-minded.

 

[shadow_boxer]

IMHO "keeping things separate" is a mentality which doesn't have a place in marriage. Sure, I certainly know things can and do go wrong but I'd rather be all-in, taking things seriously and committing mutually (even in finance) than hedging my bets.

Just can't imagine it any other way, I guess you have to find someone like-minded.

Totally agree. I wouldn't be committing to buying a house with a partner until I was married. Once we were, we setup a single joint account. Much easier to keep an eye on our finances. When we did buy a house together my wife had contributed more but then I had transferred an existing property to joint ownership when we got married.

 

[The_Abyss]

Waiting for marriage before buying a house is going too far imo. You just need to take pragmatic and reasonable precautions if you're purchasing out of marriage. The average ages for a first marriage in the UK are 33 (men) and 30 (women). I doubt many people, if they have the financial means, would want to wait purchasing a house.

On the other hand, for balance, I imagine that the average age of average first time buyer is slightly higher than those ages quoted.

 

[Richdog]

IMHO "keeping things separate" is a mentality which doesn't have a place in marriage. Sure, I certainly know things can and do go wrong but I'd rather be all-in, taking things seriously and committing mutually (even in finance) than hedging my bets.

Just can't imagine it any other way, I guess you have to find someone like-minded.

The OP isn't married, so your post has no relevance in that context.

And as "like-minded" as you want to believe people are, if things go wrong and you end up divorced, then that "like-minded" person can quickly change from the rose-tinted view you had before.

Yeah sure, you get married thinking it will be forever and you will never pslit up, I understand the romantic notions, but it really doesn't hurt to have some sensible lines and contingencies drawn, and it's generally only ignorance/naivety which makes separations so much worse than they have to be.