Poll: Older Parents - How old is too old?

How old is too old to have children?

  • 30s

    Votes: 17 4.0%

  • 40s

    Votes: 119 28.3%

  • 50s

    Votes: 200 47.5%

  • 60s

    Votes: 40 9.5%

  • Never too old

    Votes: 15 3.6%

  • Condoms, innit

    Votes: 11 2.6%

  • Pancake!

    Votes: 19 4.5%
  • Total voters
    421
Little derail but still on the subject of parenting. How long would you have to consider being with someone before committing to having kids?
 
Narj said:
I've never wanted children and I don't want them now. I think if I'd wanted them, then 21 would be the ideal age. I just couldn't handle children in my house now and it's why I won't date single mothers. I have a very "zen" home setting and don't want to disturb it.

I respect people who father children in their 40's though - that's a big commitment knowing that you're going to have to be active in your 50's and beyond. The guys I know who have done it late in life are very fit and active.
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This made me chuckle, especially the part about the Zen home. I could just imagine telling my daughter it was a toss up between her and my Zen. :D

You need to understand that kids aren't just poopy nappies and constant inconvenience that prevents those nights out and holidays away. They are your family. If I didn't have my kids I honestly think my life would have a massive void. I couldn't imagine hitting my fifties with no family.
 
The health comment is a bit misleading. You know what age you are when conceiving and you can work out your age across milestones in your child's life. You can't predict your health in any way.
 
I'm 36 next month with no kids that I know of. No girlfriend or desire to have one.
40 maybe early 40's for me, then I will never want to have kids, no way what so ever. I don't want the hassle/stress and having some leech sucking on me financially.
I'll probably never have any kids.
 
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Spacedeck said:
Little derail but still on the subject of parenting. How long would you have to consider being with someone before committing to having kids?
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Good question.

Me personally I would say 3 years minimum but I would need to factor in the age too.

Suppose if I was in my late teens early 20's and had been in a relationship for 5 years. When either of us are 26 then I would have had plenty of years to know my partner and decided if I want to have kids with them.

When you are in your 30's or 40's then it can be a different. People in their 30's, given they don't have kids already, will be with a partner 18 to 24 months MAXIMUM before they start having kids. I am starting to see this a lot. But I do question are they doing it because they actually WANT to start a family with that person and have that special unbreakable bond with the one they love or are they just doing it because they are getting older and simply want to have a child with someone.

As I said before, poop can hit the fan when it comes to relationships but the UK does have high amount of single parents compared to other parts of Europe.
 
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I'll be 37 in few months and my gf just turned 25;) I'm not really bothered so it all depends on her when she wants them. Plan is to buy a big(ish) "forever" house next year and rent out my place. Based on that it will be at least 2 years before we start thinking about it seriously.
 
bayo000 said:
I'll be 37 in few months and my gf just turned 25;) I'm not really bothered so it all depends on her when she wants them. Plan is to buy a big(ish) "forever" house next year and rent out my place. Based on that it will be at least 2 years before we start thinking about it seriously.
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That's why us men are lucky. When it comes to kids, age doesn't matter as much. You can be in your 40's, get with a woman in their 20's and have 3 or 4 kids with them. Hell! It worked for my brother and his wife is 20 years younger him but the other way round, women cant get away with it.
 
Spacedeck said:
Little derail but still on the subject of parenting. How long would you have to consider being with someone before committing to having kids?
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Was with my ex 6 years and it didn't happen. Good job as it would have wrecked my life. I would not be with my current gf. So I'd say there's no real length apart from as long as possible. At least a few years and waaaay after the honeymoon phase
 
Voted 40's but depends on many factors, how old your partner is, financially security etc. So if financially secure in early forties and have well thought it through and put plans in place should the worse happen to you then fine, but having no job or being financially insecure in 40's then no, it's not. To me it's all about doing the best for your children and ensuring they have the best opportunities still if you pass away while they're still young. So financial security and having those around you who would look after your children is crucial. It's also about not being the old grumpy git either - so in that respect the younger the better.

Personally I think there's enough kids in the world and the population is high enough, and the world is not always a great place so have really had no desire to bring more into it myself :D.
 
firstborn said:
Why ask me and not her? It would after all be her choice.
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Her answer would be no because she's too old irrespective of her health. Yourself and the other post I quoted seem to think that age shouldn't be a primary concern when having children.

So I am asking you, or are you going to deflect against n?
 
Don't forget it works both ways; the older the man is the more chance his offspring has of having things like autism, apparently!

Health wise, the pro's outweigh the con's of babies being born from young parents compared to old parents. The vast advantage above all else is the likelihood of the child being born to older parents is the better chance of being more higher educated than their parents and/or financially more comfortable throughout their entire life.

My mum had my sisters when she was 20 and 22, me when she was 30, my older sister had kids at 30, 33, 39 and during each day of birth she had zero issues at all and she was back home the same day of giving births. No cesareans required or anything. Together 7 years before their first born came.

And yet here is me I get bored of being in relationship after a few months, the older I get I find that I'm always attracted to women in their 18-20's. I'm like way different to my sister (she claims two men, suurrrre!! lol), she's had at most a few blokes in her earlier years, while I'm like... lost count (women), I was the baby of the family - when I was a kid, and yet we all get on really really well I wouldn't trade any of them in for anything or amount of money in the world. I've never even cheated on any girlfriend. My mum keeps badgering me she really wants grandkids from me, while I'm there thinking like - nah, ain't gonna happen! Unless its by "accident" in which case my social life goes totally towards loving the kid... hey I'm no ********, I'd love a kid really! I'm good either way.
 
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I said 40's.

I am 30 with a 6 month old girl. We have worked hard for our current situation (home, future school catchments :rolleyes: etc) Hoping to have at least one more in the future.

My feelings on it have always been based on my thoughts of;

if by the child's age of 18(ish) is it highly likely that I would have been able to have enjoyed their childhood with them (and parents not died or passed on a health condition due to parental age) and been able to suitably prepare them for their life ahead then it's ok.

:)
 
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