OcUK Dadsnet thread

robj20 · 27 Mar 2019 at 07:54

Kreeeee said:
I also do not get chased around the garden and tickled by friends and relatives, but because a child is different to an adult it's fine.

Choice, that's the key.
Friends and relatives! Since when were we talking about friends and relatives.

Have to agree to disagree then, i will continue to give inpolite people both barrels.
You can continue to let strangers do what they like to your baby.

Skynet5 · 27 Mar 2019 at 07:55

robj20 said:
Just different then. Going to continue to pull strangers up for touching him. By all means talk to him.
He gets plenty of social interaction with people that are polite enough to ask. So the odd impolite person can do one.

No one is answering my question regards if someone did the same to you would that be just fine.
If i came up to you and pinched your cheeks and ruffled your hair, you wouldn't mind, its not a big deal after all.

This all doesn't even take into account he's susceptible to chest related infections.
I just generally find it weird for strangers to want to touch somebody they don't know. But some how is okay because that somebody can't say no for themselves.

Hmm. I would say parent how you want to parent.

Every situation is different based on age of child, age of third party, location, general look of the person etc

But probably a bit OTT in your situation, but you're allowed to be...especially if no one has touched him before.

You'll soften up. :-)

Kreeeee · 27 Mar 2019 at 07:59

robj20 · 27 Mar 2019 at 08:00

lnoton said:
Hmm. I would say parent how you want to parent.

Every situation is different based on age of child, age of third party, location, general look of the person etc

But probably a bit OTT in your situation, but you're allowed to be...especially if no one has touched him before.

You'll soften up.

True. But i doubt it, what he continues to go through means he needs protecting.
Put it this way the way she touched his left arm do the same with the right and you could easily hurt. I'm not about to take the risk.
He's already on loads of meds to avoid chest injections, again in going to do what i can to avoid him catching anything.
The only playgroups he's allowed to for instance are worth similar babies so the risk is minimised.

I agree with you that as a parent you want to give a quick judgment on the person wanting to touch your child, are they clean, do they have a cigarette hanging out of there mouth that sort of thing.

I'm not against people touching him but i want to know about it first it's really that simple.

Over Clocker · 27 Mar 2019 at 16:26

robj20 said:
It's got nothing to do with me thinking they're peados.
I just don't like strangers interacting with my child.
You wouldn't walk up to an adult and hold there hand would you do why is it okay to do the same to a child.

I'm afraid that I'd go as far to say your little boy is going to grow up very (overly) afraid of strangers and social interaction, eg an adult trying to help him in the future if he got lost or something.

He's a child, not an adult, it's completely different. It's a bit like people stoking your dog when they say hi to you. Yes, it's lovely if they ask first, in case your dog is aggressive or something. I've got two boys and the attention they receive from strangers when out shopping etc is more than welcome and good for them!

As I said, everyone is different and it's your choice.

RoboCod · 27 Mar 2019 at 16:27

robj20 said:
You can continue to let strangers do what they like to your baby.

Hahah

ocuk never fails to deliver

gonda · 27 Mar 2019 at 19:15

Had quite an eventful 24 hours with the unborn child, without going into too much detail we’ve just gotten home from hospital and thankfully all has turned out to be safe and well. What it has done is make me realise how emotionally invested I already am at this stage, I can only start to try and comprehend therefore why parents are rightly or wrongly so protective of their other halves and kids.

I already love the little blob of flesh and blood and can’t wait to hopefully meet them! Yes you can hopefully remind me that I said this when I’ve had no sleep for 12 months

Devrij · 28 Mar 2019 at 07:23

gonda said:
Had quite an eventful 24 hours with the unborn child, without going into too much detail we’ve just gotten home from hospital and thankfully all has turned out to be safe and well. What it has done is make me realise how emotionally invested I already am at this stage, I can only start to try and comprehend therefore why parents are rightly or wrongly so protective of their other halves and kids.

I already love the little blob of flesh and blood and can’t wait to hopefully meet them! Yes you can hopefully remind me that I said this when I’ve had no sleep for 12 months

12 months? Pshhh, try years.

gonda · 28 Mar 2019 at 08:44

Devrij said:
12 months? Pshhh, try years.

Nah don't remind me then, I don't do well on little sleep..

Devrij · 28 Mar 2019 at 15:06

gonda said:
Nah don't remind me then, I don't do well on little sleep..

You'll be surprised. You just get on with it. The first month is pretty rough, and then it eases out eventually as they stop waking up for nighttime feeds. Then it gets rough again if you're unlucky like me, and once they're big enough to get out of bed and come wake you up it gets worse. I haven't got any further than that yet.

dl8860 · 28 Mar 2019 at 17:09

Devrij said:
You'll be surprised. You just get on with it. The first month is pretty rough, and then it eases out eventually as they stop waking up for nighttime feeds. Then it gets rough again if you're unlucky like me, and once they're big enough to get out of bed and come wake you up it gets worse. I haven't got any further than that yet.

Our 10 month old has been a stellar sleeper ever since we got past early feeding issues. Regularly does 6.30pm to 6.30am. I know toddlers can be awful getting up early (groclock armed and ready), but if he's this good until now are we past any unexpected worsening in sleeping performance?

skaif · 28 Mar 2019 at 19:02

My girl got worse! She was sleeping from 7.30 - 7.30 right up unitl about 2 years old. 6 months later now and she gets up at around midnight in a panic asking for us (she is in her own room)

Trying rewards and things to get her to stay in bed!

RoboCod · 28 Mar 2019 at 19:15

Devrij said:
You'll be surprised. You just get on with it. The first month is pretty rough, and then it eases out eventually as they stop waking up for nighttime feeds. Then it gets rough again if you're unlucky like me, and once they're big enough to get out of bed and come wake you up it gets worse. I haven't got any further than that yet.

Lucky you! Our 5 month old is up almost every hour or two for a feed (breast fed) and has been since day one. He also cries over the slightest thing. The best thing is him crying and working himself up and up because he's tired. Getting him off for his nap can prove hellish. This morning I was trying to settle him from 4am to 630am. Fun times!

Abraxaz1 · 28 Mar 2019 at 21:43

Haha,

I'm a complete arse, I manage to sleep through the night issues. My missus fumes that I'm such a heavy sleeper.

Devrij · 29 Mar 2019 at 09:21

dl8860 said:
Our 10 month old has been a stellar sleeper ever since we got past early feeding issues. Regularly does 6.30pm to 6.30am. I know toddlers can be awful getting up early (groclock armed and ready), but if he's this good until now are we past any unexpected worsening in sleeping performance?

I think it's different for everyone. Our girl was great sleeping through every night until about 9 months and that was that. She's getting better now though. She'll often pop in quietly, crawl into bed and go straight to sleep, but it's rare that she actually wakes up screaming these days. Now she has a big bed one of us just hops in her bed if she comes in.

SpeedFreak · 29 Mar 2019 at 11:48

robj20 said:
True. But i doubt it, what he continues to go through means he needs protecting.
Put it this way the way she touched his left arm do the same with the right and you could easily hurt. I'm not about to take the risk.
He's already on loads of meds to avoid chest injections, again in going to do what i can to avoid him catching anything.
The only playgroups he's allowed to for instance are worth similar babies so the risk is minimised.

I agree with you that as a parent you want to give a quick judgment on the person wanting to touch your child, are they clean, do they have a cigarette hanging out of there mouth that sort of thing.

I'm not against people touching him but i want to know about it first it's really that simple.

And that's fine but recognise that based on a small straw poll here you are probably in the minority (situation depending). Nobody is telling you that you are wrong, just that it is not what we/they would do in a similar situation. People have offered their views but in response you've implied that you are right and everyone else is simply negligent, which is not really in the spirit of this thread.

Pookie Bear · 29 Mar 2019 at 15:09

Steedie said:
We got the results back today from the blood tests

1 in 160 chance of Downs syndrome
1 in 10248 chance of Edward's or Patau

So while 1 in 160 isn't as low risk as it could be, it's a hell of a lot better than we were led to believe it would be from the way the nurse told us about the initial NT measurement. I feel so much better but obviously we're not out the woods yet as there is the risk of cardiac abnormalities and the other risks of high NT, but still, I'm pleased with this first step We're going to Disneyland Paris tomorrow and I would have hated for some bad news to ruin that trip for my son because we would be so upset about the news.

I can't imagine your relief compared to what it seemed it might have been.

My wife's SPD is so bad, at 28 weeks with twins, that she has been told to consider no more driving, and there was even mention of a wheelchair moving forward. She's very independent, so that's quite a blow to her - she hates the crutches. Fingers crossed it doesn't get much worse.

Dup · 29 Mar 2019 at 17:13

Pookie Bear said:
I can't imagine your relief compared to what it seemed it might have been.

My wife's SPD is so bad, at 28 weeks with twins, that she has been told to consider no more driving, and there was even mention of a wheelchair moving forward. She's very independent, so that's quite a blow to her - she hates the crutches. Fingers crossed it doesn't get much worse.

The Serola belt of SPD made quite a difference for my other half. Assume she's had physio and had a similar belt to try however, we skipped that and went straight for the belt. Bit of an expense for what it is but kept her more mobile until her due date

theone8181 · 29 Mar 2019 at 20:11

Daughters just had her first bug from school Yay. Kind of wish I hadn't given her chocolate tonight. Feel quite bad as there's nothing I can to make it better (and also amazing how much a 5 years can cover, the whole sofa needed cleaning).