AM I WRONG

I'm 20 and have paid my mum £150/month 'rent' ever since I started full-time work a year ago. The whole time I was in education she didn't ask for anything.

I think it's only fair to pay your way, you'd have to do it if you lived anywhere else, why not with your parents? £150/month is nothing compared to if I had to get a flat!
 
weescott said:
To an extent you are both right. On the flip side when I was that age I wanted to be working and paying my way while my mother wanted to pay for me to go on a round the world adventure. Give them some slack to enjoy being a yooooth but at the same time pressure them some what to learn to be responsible.
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At the moment i do not have the funds to pay for them to go to macdonalds let alone a(round the world adventure) so unless you live in the (real world) please keep your unrealistic words to yourself. THANKYOU
 
Where did I suggest paying for your kids to go off on a round the world adventure? When my mother suggested that she was a mature student at uni and was going to take a loan out to do so. It was not a suggestion or for that matter unrealistic. In the "real world", I paid for myself to go on a adventure. There is nothing to suggest that your kids can't do the same.

I was trying to be understanding and give an objective opinion. No need for caps and pawning me off.
 
When i was 18 i started paying rent. I paid 1/4 of what i earnt. If it was a quiet week (part time) then i might only pay £50 - £100 but when i was fulltime i stilled paid the same %. £200 it ended up being. Although ive always been in work, i doubt my parents would expect me pay if i didnt have a job.

What im saying is, if one has a job he should be paying his way, its far far cheaper to live at home and generally speaking most parents do a lot for their kids.

The other one, if he genuinly (sp) couldnt get a job fair enough but if hes just been lazy then well, he should be doing something atleast to help out, though he really should get a job.
 
I always paid board from when I started working at 17 (I had a job at 16 but they wouldn't let me pay anything, as they wanted my first year of money to be mine, as I'd never really had the luxury of money in my pocket.)

My 'rents have now stopped charging me board at 21 as I want to try and get myself through Uni without taking on student loans. They can't really help with money, other than to not charge me any board.

So yes, he should get off his ass and find a job, and if he isn't saving money for education or his own place, should pay board as well.
 
Mine don't charge me anything while I'm actually doing uni stuff, but do expect some during summer (or when I took gap year pre uni and spent part of it at home)
 
I think you'd probably feel the same as her if they were actually yours and she'd probably feel the same as you if they weren't actually hers.
 
i got a job at 16 and paid my parents 25% digs each week from my earnings ... what was the question?
 
Through 6th form I earned £100 a week and paid at least £100 a month in board which was fair play, I'm now at uni and pay a fair wack more than that.
You need to show them the real world
 
They are not kids anymore, they are both men, capable of shouldering adult responsibilities.

Give the younger a 'final' gift of a return plane ticket to a developing nation (India, China etc). Tell him to go see the world and that when he gets back he's going to pay his own way. The aim being for him to grow a pair and start looking after himself.
 
At 16 I was on a YTS getting about £35 a week and paying £80 a month for board. At 20+ they're both men! They'll never clear off if you keep subsidising 'em.
 
phonemonkey said:
Perhaps it's worth having a word with your partner about it, explaining like you think it's something which would be benefical to the kids
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There's your answer mate.

I'm guessing you've talked this through with your partner but have you had a thorough non-heated discussion about it? Or is it difficult to approach because you think she'll get overly defensive and say something hurtful (even though you sound like you've been there to support them)?

Surely if you could both calmly discuss this issue, you would see her side of things and she would see yours. Maybe one of you misunderstands a situation that you haven't realised yet.

I used to minimal pay rent but my younger brother refused to. He's got a lot of respect for money, has very good morals and is about twenty times more intelligent than I was at his age.

I ended up going to university for many reasons but one of them was to get away from paying the rent, working on the house and all the chores that come with life with parents. Everyone has to grow up.
 
I got a job at 15 and as long as i lived with my rents i paid my way. For a start if i could afford to go out or at the younger age blow cash on gadgets, i could sure as hell pay my way to living and food. Im now 22 and moved out some time ago but i now know the value of money and understand that i cant free load my way through life. Paying my board when i was younger was a good way to learn and understand how this life works.
On top of that i couldn't stand the thought of my parents or rather parent working their ass off to pay for the mortgage. bills, food and the rest while i just blew all my cash on nights out and didn't help out!
As to the youngest son who isn't getting off his ass id suggest a rather large boot! I could understand him not paying his way if he was actually looking for a job but to be out partying instead with no income is just daft, and the eldest just needs to learn it aint a free ride through life!
 
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