*** Anonymous Confessions Thread v8 ***

about a year ago I had a really bad day at work, so upon visiting the toilets I decided to show my displeasure at my employeer by weeing all over the floor. This soon became a regular occurance, and has started to escalate and now gotten
out of hand. I have designed a game where I sand right behind the door and see how far I can spray urine up the wall.
The last time the cubicle looked like someone had attacked it with a shower hose. I've heard the cleaners complaining
about it in the corridor and have even theatend to go on strike. Some days it absolutely stinks. I can't help myself and find it really funny.
 
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There was a time in my life I did everything in excess.


I had started seeing a new girl a few towns over, I'd only ever met her twice but already hit it. Hard. She loved it, I loved it, was a nice new thing.


That Friday I go out with the boys as usual, meet at the pub, jump out and grab a bottle, chill, drink. smoke, snort, whatever... always end up at a friends club till the early hours and then head home. I'd told my new girl that morning I'd link her afterwards which she said was cool, but then she hadn't replied to me at all that evening.


At the end of the night I was driver, as usual, so drop everyone off then went to go see her for some coked up 'boingy-boingy' and then biff and bed. As I drop my last friend off, he pours me a shot into a Maccy D's cup (half the cup!) and gives me the rest of his coke. Good friend


I head off, get to hers and call again, no answer. I thought **** it, I'll have a biff here and see if she comes home then I'll do one. I'm watching Top Gear I think with a spliff and some vodka sitting in my car parked down the road from her house when she pulls up in a taxi and comes out holding hands with next man! Lucky I'd had that biff as I'm an angry mother ****** when drunk and would have jumped out flinging but instead I cried... that woke me up... I thought I'd got this chick on lock from day but turns out she played me proper - being tall, dark and handsome has it's advantanges, add charm and money and you feel invincible, but anyone can get ghosted - as soon as I caught myself crying though I sort of psycologically slapped myself, I was like why the **** you crying over this random? I blame the drugs and the booze. I fixed up quite quick, billed another for the drive home and shot off.


It's about 30 miles total I think, from there to here, most of it motorway. I blurted home, music blaring, traction control off, just having fun. Then I passed a police car unkowingly - mistake one - so I put my foot all the way down to get the hell home - mistake two.


I get off the motorway, no one behind me, no one in front, it was about 4/5am by now I think, relax... neck the drink in the Maccys Cup - mistake three. Say to myself I need another spliff after that, so pull into an industrial estate and bill one, spark it, drive home... decide to have a bit more fun on the round-abouts on my way back home, ones I play on all the time, but you know that time when you black-out from too much booze and don't recall anything until that moment you snap back into sober? yeh, that happened. I remember going down a dual carriage way quite fast, next thing I remember is facing a barrier sliding sideways before rolling over and airbags going off. Next thing someone is talking to me insdie my car telling me I've had an accident and do I need help, as I'm trying to figure out how to hang that up *tap tap tap* on the window... a god damn copper! Before I'd even had the chance to take off my seatbelt. Helped me out, asked what happened, I told them I had traction control disabled, they laughed, all was quite pleseant until another police man showed them the bottles on the foor of my car and then smelt the Maccys cup. their mood changed so quickly!

They didn't cuff me, but they took me in. When I'm in th police car I remember the baggy of coke my friend gave me that's in my pocket! Uh-oh! Straight into my sock and between my toes, the best I could think of.


They check me in (?!) at the police station and then before they take me to my cell they take all my stuff, even my belt and shoes, then they ask the copper who broguth me in if they think I need to be searched and he said no... phew!!! I go to my cell and sleep it all off (after breathalisers, interviews and lawyers etc.). What a night.

Got 18 month diving ban (reduced to 13) for drink driving.
 
These are too long, can you TLDR them Mags? :p :p

I read the drink driver one though. Sounds like it could be any number of idiots I know!
 
[FnG]magnolia said:
about a year ago I had a really bad day at work, so upon visiting the toilets I decided to show my displeasure at my employeer by weeing all over the floor.
Click to expand...

This is horrible. I’m shocked it lasted and they didn’t start monitoring the toilet.

[FnG]magnolia said:
There was a time in my life I did everything in excess
Click to expand...

Should have been a 2 year ban, fine and a sentence of 3 months or so. Horrible that knowing someone could have been killed over reckless driving and driving under the influance.
 
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Someone who thinks they are tall, dark, handsome, charming, and rich, only needs one word to describe themselves. It begins with C, and ends with T.

They're probably a total chav who thinks they're all that cos they spent all their money on a cheap suit and can afford to buy a round every now and then before going back to their council flat to watch porn on their Brighthouse financed flat screen. One of those inbred skinhead sid the sloth lookalikes. :p
 
mrbell1984 said:
This is horrible. I’m shocked it lasted and they didn’t start monitoring the toilet.



Should have been a 2 year ban, fine and a sentence of 3 months or so. Horrible that knowing someone could have been killed over reckless driving and driving under the influance.
Click to expand...

The PoPo didnt know what we now know. They just found a guy upside down in his car who was over the legal limit.
 
Acme said:
Someone who thinks they are tall, dark, handsome, charming, and rich, only needs one word to describe themselves. It begins with C, and ends with T.
Click to expand...

Carrot?

:D

Toilet one : What's wrong with you? you're only punishing the cleaners who I guarantee have a worse job than you do. If you want to punish the boss, then do something that actually effects them not some poor cleaner on min wage.

Poo finger one - prude :p

Car/coke one - Total BS. Cops will always search you if they take you in to make sure you've nothing else on you including drugs/weapons.
 
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