"I like where you have placed that balcony- it is the perfect location to throw your self off from after looking at your hideous building."
"well, to be honest it's a bit poo but that's ok, you'll learn!"
"Rendering and adding context to your elevation is like putting glitter on a piece of ****."
Those quotes cracked me up,I would have no idea how to react if they said that to me!

The one I heard that made me laugh was "Am I blind?Because I can't see a building in this pinup"
(star out the sweary mate)