Anyone else buttered up a muffin just to throw it away?

wannabedamned

wannabedamned

wannabedamned

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I've been single now for 2 years, After 2 relationships 1 that lasting 4 years and another that lasted 6 years. I needed real space from it and just wanted to see what life was like without being attached, and i've loved it.

Now, problem is I decided a month back I was ready to start seeing someone again and I put my sights straight onto someone I've known a good while and someone I thought I wanted, she's interested in me too and we've sort of been seeing each other for 3/4 weeks, but I've completely backtracked with how I'm feeling!! She doesnt know this. but I still dont want a relationship, not right now, I'm back in college, and re-training to do something new, and my life is moving in a completely new direction, I dont want to set something in stone now, when i dont know what the future holds. who I'll meet, where I'll be, etc.

I know that the best thing to do is keep away from being serious, But how do you just turn off the flirting, and go to being cold after a month of affection. I'm supposed to be at hers friday, and I'm going. But I get the feeling it's going to be a weekend where I'm going to hurt her feelings.

1 comment I've had already from my brother is that I'm scared of getting into another relationship, but i honestly dont think that's the case. I don't feel scared, i feel like it's time i could spend better elsewhere. Which is horrible!!

Anyone been in a similar situation? Any comments?
 
You've only been seeing her a month, calm your boots and tell her you want to take it slow. You still like the girl to some degree right? Then just see less of her and see what happens given time, certainly don't monopolise an entire weekend with her company.

[compulsory lower tone GD reply]
That said, if you don't like her any more then smash her pasty, steal half the contents of her fridge before leaving* and dump her by text
[/c l t GD r]

*I have never done this. Honest.
 
Duff-Man said:
Didn't you just answer your own question right there? :confused:
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I did yes, but in context it's more a moral question. :)

It is just a case of making sure she knows its casual isnt it, I mean i've gotten that used to saying, "You know I dont want a relationship right?" over the past 2 years, I forgot there was a nice grey area called casual :p
 
Just chill, take it slow and casual. Things will naturally go where they will.

There's no need to make a big deal over it being a casual relationship, not after such a short time anyway.

Don't stress and have fun, and if it's not fun, tell her and move on.
 
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Allnamestaken said:
Your gay.
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His gay what? ;)

Be careful of the 'casual' route though, if at any stage you start to think it definitely isn't going anywhere then knock it on the head as although you're happy with it being casual the other half more than likely agreed to it as a way of being together when they want something more. (Although this is less likely in scenarios where it is declared as casual from the very outset, but this doesn't seem like one of those times)
 
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Smash her pasty then decide....

No but really you're worrying about hurting her feelings by saying you ain't too sure how you feel, would hurt her more if you went ahead with it and then broke up with her.
 
Hxc said:
I self sabotage almost everything :)
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JD from Scrubs said:
I'm narcissistic, I'm pessimistic, I'm obsessive, I'm insecure. And I am so afraid of intimacy that every one of my relationships is a journey of self-sabotage that inevitably ends in a black vacuum of shattered expectations and despair.
Click to expand...

Mind you, that led to him pulling Heather Graham. Played.
 
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