Anyone else just bimble along through life?

[Telecaster]

Is anyone else in this boat? I don't seem to have any ideas, plans or much in the way of interests, I just seem to bimble along not doing much really aside from going to work, housework and sleep. I emailed the boss last week asking how many of my 20 days holiday I had left for the year as I can't remember taking any and I have 16 left to use before Christmas or I lose them, can't for the life of me think of anything to do, I'll probably end up pottering around the house for a couple of weeks.

I've always seemed to be this way about everything, I'm so laid back and don't take a single thing seriously or care about much at all to be honest. I'm just a bit worried that when it comes to an end I'll look back and regret it.

 

[Telecaster]

Get a cheap flight and go visit a foreign country.You're wasting your life.

I don't have a passport, but I get your point.

I like the idea of these things in theory but then when start to think about the hassle involved I just can't be arsed.

 

[Telecaster]

So what interests you?

Not a lot to be honest, I've never had more than a passing interest in anything really.

I'm sure that if I were to come into a life changing amount of money that enabled me to quit working then I could find something to do with my time, but just trying to fill a few hours a week with poverty spec interests doesn't really do anything for me.

 

[Telecaster]

My problem is I just don't care about anything. I also just don't enjoy things anymore at all. Back when you were 19 going out was like a big deal go to the club with the lads it was exciting, now it's meh. Same with pc games I used to love diving into a good pc game but now I just load up play 5 mins and quit.

Am I depressed? maybe, who knows.

I can relate to some of that (though I've never done the going out thing even when young)

Interests have only ever been fads really, not serious enough for me to care about them and make them life long passions or what have you, I used to like gaming and PCs a bit, then I didn't. I used to read a bit, then I didn't, that goes for lots of stuff etc.

I've always suspected I've suffered with depression, but I'm not sure because it doesn't really prevent me from functioning in my day to day life, and in the past five years I've had this job I've not had a single day off sick, nor in my last job either. If it is depression it's not crippling or debilitating.

 

[Telecaster]

First step. Go get a passport. Go do it tonight, start the process.

Then why not just go somewhere? What do you like? What’s your favourite food? Just go there for a few days (assuming Europe).
I like beer, so I went to Munich.
I like paella so I went to Spain.

Now, ask yourself. WHy haven’t you applied for a passport? Stop thinking and start doing!

Apathy is the biggest killer of time, and you can stop it. Right now. Click this link and do!

https://www.passport.service.gov.uk...0941.544931176.1569270156-13837551.1568108883

I don't need to ask myself why I haven't applied for a passport, I know why, I just can't be arsed.

I've no burning desire to go abroad otherwise I'd obviously have done it before now.

 

[Telecaster]

Im the same, during work i think of all the things i could do, but when it comes to a day off i just sit at home bored and do nothing. Just waiting to die now. I wish i was 20 again.

That's all I do, sit around waiting for 10pm and bed time, then it starts again. Only good thing is at least the weeks go quick and it's soon Friday again, although I had to work last weekend so it didn't really matter.

 

[Telecaster]

You never said you are unhappy with your life at the moment, just that you seem to coast through life. Do you want to be doing more or just feel like you should be because it seems like every Tom, Dick and Harry are having great adventures, making money and living the high life.?

Some of this I think, everyone else seems to have plans, goals, interests and know what they want or what they're aiming for and I've never felt that way.

I love the peace and quiet that comes from being on my own and I don't feel lonely, it just seems massively at odds with how we're programmed/brainwashed to live from an early age and it can get quite tiring either explaining or telling people that you did nothing again at the weekend when they were off doing this that or the other.

 

[Telecaster]

Aren't we all (OP) ? The closest personal attribution I have is towards a philosophy of existential nihilism. Just enjoy life for what it is or isn't. Be honest with yourself and others and share that honesty whenever possible. Let others be and allow them to live the life they wish.

I never ask anyone what they did either last night or at the weekend, I'm not really interested in what they did, yet a bloke I work with insists on telling me and asking what I did. I just tell him 'nothing' because I know it winds him up that other people don't have to be doing something with every second of their spare time like he does.

I never poke my nose into other people's business, maybe it's because I prize my own privacy so highly that I would find it offensive to be constantly asking people where they're going, who with and what they did.

I didn't post for sympathy or ideas, I genuinely wanted to know if there were others in similar situations or whether I'm just an outcast.

 

[Telecaster]

Well, why would I?

 

[Telecaster]

One thing I am envious of is those who enjoy work/jobs, I can't think of a single one that would have me skipping out of bed in a morning, to me it's just a thing I have to do to put a roof over my head and food on the plate, nothing more.

So just getting through the working week can take a lot out of me mentally because it's such a battle to keep going, which also leads me to being slightly the way I am in that I don't plan anything because my focus is on just getting through the days one at a time, everything else gets put on hold so I can accomplish that first and foremost.

 

[Telecaster]

I do remember however reading similar comments from the OP in the past, particularly about his job so perhaps really you do want change. Not for me to say though, its down to you.

Job's a job though, everyone has to do it, I'm no different to millions of other trudging through the daily grind.

I would like more time off though, even if it's just sat at home, as long as I'm not at work it doesn't matter what I do with them. Job is quite restrictive in that sense with the bare minimum 20 days and kind of restricted by other people being off. 2 weeks off in one chunk doesn't go down well so I'm surprised he let me have it, so far this year I've just used a day here or there like a Friday to make a long weekend, last time I was off more than that was Easter.

 

[Telecaster]

From reading this and your other posts it really does sound like you’re simply scared of change and what other people think.

If you’re office based at the moment getting a WFH gig shouldn’t be too difficult somewhere else at least for a day or two a week. Feeling guilty about taking more than a week off is a massive red flag if your employer is making you feel that way, or is it just the pressure it puts on your workload when back?

Both, we could do with another man but he won't take one on because the work is so up and down that he doesn't want to pay someone when we're a bit less snowed under, but that means doing two roles the rest of the time.

when I've a bit more experience under my belt I will look at changing companies, he runs this one like it's still a one man band, winging it mostly and expecting people to go above and beyond like you would if the money were going straight into your pocket.

I don't expect to be magically happier though, I tend to hate all the jobs after a couple of years and I've had a fair few lol.

 

[Telecaster]

So @Telecaster, what have you done to make some positive changes in the last few days?

I think it's important to look back, regularly, to see what you've changed and what you've put in place to live a better life. Even if it's something very small, it's progress.

Nothing, but then I wasn't looking to change anything. I was asking if anyone was in a similar position.

 

[Telecaster]

Are you sure?

I know where your coming from you sound very similair to me, but i am suffering depression on and off, i hope your happy on your path

Well it's an entirely theoretical question really as I won't know until I get there, it was more repeating what you hear old people say, along with "at the end, nobody ever wished they'd worked harder" etc.

I'm neither happy nor unhappy, just bimbling along!

 

[Telecaster]

It's easy to feel you're stuck in an endless loop of doing nothing meaningful or wasting time with no plans etc.

The key is to add small rounds of positivity around your life. Nobody can change over night, and these things take ongoing effort. People have suggested learning to play an instrument or taking up some other creative hobby. These things won't come naturally if you just think "oh I'll learn to play acoustic guitar now" suddenly. You have to have the positive mindset first to get up and start with a small amount here and there. Before all that you need inspiration/motivation. That only comes from having the mindset to do it. Browse youtube and other social media and find the subjects that interest you and start building a playlist of that stuff. In time these will be the motivators and you'll slowly start seeing inspiration everywhere.

Remember that nothing worthwhile is ever easy. And if you're always looking for an excuse to tell yourself that it's not worth doing, that's all you're going to find when you look online or offline. Instead of saying "I can't do that", it should instead be "how can I do that", you get the idea.

I used to play guitar, sold most of the gear but still have an acoustic laying around, no interest in playing any more as it just felt like a chore and not fun.

I've tried loads of hobbies but I just get disinterested after a brief period of enthusiasm. Nothing has stuck.

 

[Telecaster]

Sounds like you are after something seriously challenging and fun at the same time. I've said it before, but I'll say it again, look up Calisthenics/Street Workouts. You will find most of the moves incredibly hard or impossible if you've never done any proper bodyweight workouts before, but you will very quickly build up strength and want to do more and more advanced moves. Progressions are endless so you will never get bored an you'll be doing body and mind a massive favour and increasing overall wellbeing at the same time. You need zero equipment to this as well so really there is no excuse!

You can do it 5 days a week and give yourself the weekend to kick back and relax. 30 minutes a day to an hour max.

Yeah ok, doesn't really interest me but each to their own.

 

[Telecaster]

So you've asked what people do, because you're stuck for ideas.

None of the ideas posed interest you and "each to their own".

This is the issue at hand, you're forcing yourself into a negative decline and all you're seeing is the lack of interest because that's all you want to see.

I'm afraid to say it but this is largely a pointless thread then :/

Why, just because I don't want to swing from a pole after a day's grafting?

I've already said I've tried dozens of hobbies and none of them stick, including exercise based ones, how is calisthenics going to be any different?

Or is it just because I brushed off your own personal suggestion?

I do enough exercise at work to make doing it out of work a complete turn off.

 

[Telecaster]

You got a GF/BF whatever you are into?

Never been bothered to be honest, I couldn't be doing with being around someone so much, I guess a really really casual thing would be ok but then that is what adultwork is for.

 

[Telecaster]

I don't know if he had posted his relationship status but yeah being forever alone is likely one of the many things that has made him depressed.

He could always try and find that person whilst abroad. Love you long time in Thailand if he's desperate. I don't like going out on my own either but I would do it if I needed to. I've traveled several hundreds of miles and stayed overnight for jobs, job interviews even, etc. I've also went abroad where I've known none of the other males and just mingled when the women went off to do their thing and got stuck in and had a great time and made life long friends.

It would only be scary or daunting to someone who is socially inept. Which may be a factor here. So he needs to take baby steps then until he can go out and enjoy his life.

I have no problem doing things by myself, I've done it all my life. If I wanted to go on holiday by myself I'd have absolutely no problem doing so.

 

[Telecaster]

Have you ever had a full blood workup done including test levels? That needs to be specially requested and approved by the gp first they won't just do one if you ask. They will want to know why and you need to pass various other signs first without signs of abuse of illegal substances.

Sounds like your test levels might be low. As you don't seem to have any mojo.

Not been to the Doctor's since I was a kid, not even registered with one where I live now so I suppose I should sort that out. FWIW I have no problem with mojo when I'm not at work, but that just drains me.

I guess if you're shut up in an office behind a desk all day then you're itching to get out and do something/use up some energy at the end of the day, where as it's the opposite for me, all I want to do is put my feet up and have a rest.