Anyone fancy reading a script I wrote?

Forde said:
Tell us more. Why wasn't the feedback worth it?
Click to expand...

I'll email it you if you want Forde.

It had some good points in it, compared to some feedback we got from this editor at HBO, it was a fair bit better. But they still passed on it, what annoyed me was a lot of it was things we already had.

They were saying "this person has to do this, go here, interact like this" and we have all that in the synopses for further episodes. They did say a few times specifically that although we had them in there, they should be in the pilot episode, which is fair enough and we'll definitely be addressing some of those but it did seem a bit like they wanted everything all at once.

I don't know what I was expecting, at least they didn't say we needed to learn how to write a script properly.
 
Dont worry about it.. Just keep meeting the right people and getting them to look over it..

JK Rowling didnt get published by any of the publishing houses she submitted the Harry Potter books to.. in the end she had to pay for them to be published herself.

It only takes one person to read it and like it for you to get a break.

Keep at it :)
 
yeah I'm starting to think people aren't really getting it, like they've all said we know what we're talking about and we're incredibly accurate with our portrayals (for the most part) but that it isn't funny enough.

I don't want to say I don't agree with it because that sounds a bit arrogant, I think it's alright to disagree with some of it as long as you're taking on the rest.

I think people are reading some of the jokes like really heavy bits of drama, like my favourite joke in the whole thing is the main guy explaining why he doesn't like his uncle, his dad says "he's alright", the kid goes "he threw me in a lake" and the dad goes "yeah it weren't deep" but no one has mentioned those types of lines, everyone comments on the more obvious jokes.

I honestly don't know if it's a good thing it's so specific, I suppose it is if we find someone who truly gets it but I'm losing confidence by the day that anyone is going to.

We said that now that it's sent out, we'd leave it and start something else but now we're getting feedback, I'm tempted to change it to accommodate some of the points I agree with and have another go, but if you do that, then where do you stop?
 
Some points:

1) It's okay to be a bit arrogant: it proves you believe in your product wholeheartedly. As long as you're not a **** about it - which you aren't :D

2) Don't give up, but do start work on the rest of the episodes OR start something new while you find a home for the first script. Sometimes a screenplay can take over your life a bit and it's good to step away, do something else entirely for a week and then go back with fresh eyes.

3) Of course, you can always make the pilot yourself - that way you can ensure your actors deliver your lines how you want them to be delivered. A ready-made (albeit ultra-low budget film) is a much more 'stand-out' calling card than an unsolicited script.

4) Not everyone who reads your script will understand it, will 'get' it or will have the vision to translate those static words into moving images they way you have in your head. Therefore, listen to what they say and take their comments on board, read your script again with their comments in your mind, but then don't be afraid to ignore them if you still think you're right. Your script is from your life experience and nobody else has lived that - that's why number 3 might be a good option for you.

If you want pointers about number 3 up there I can tell you what you'll need.
 
yeah I've thought a few times about making it myself but no matter what way round I think about it, it's gonna cost me money I don't have.

I need a producer.

I have a couple of mates who have their own small company doing promo videos and stuff at the minute, one of them is actually a really talented director who has won awards for his short films. He's offered a couple of times but when I asked him a bit more about he still needed me to produce it.
 
DO IT! ;)

Producing isn't that hard, especially if you've got time to do it properly - it's basically being organised and arranging everyone. Also, it's likely that you'll only pay out money for props (if your script even needs any) and food for cast & crew during the shoot.

Actors: free. There are plenty out there on sites like Star Now and Casting Call Pro that will audition and work for free. Hell, if they're close to your shooting location they might not even need travel expenses.

Crew: free. Like actors, short films are great for crew because each person gets promoted for the day. So, a camera assistant gets to be a cameraman, a runner get to be a sound engineer and so on.

Anyway, you get the idea. We just shot a short. It's going to be about 10 minutes long, we had four really good actors, seven crew, some serious kit, an excellent location and all we needed to pay was our two lead actors' travel expenses and lunch. My point is that we did it with a budget that only stretched to petrol money and tesco sandwiches - so don't give up hope! With your type of script you could get away with not even having decent kit, especially as yours would be more about animating your script, whereas ours was a finished product.

You could even have your characters doing the filming with mobile phone video cameras as a gimmick.
 
Last edited:
anksta, do you have MSN? If not, drop me an e-mail in trust. If you're looking for a new project, I'm happy to discuss some ideas if you'd like to try some collaboration.
 
Nix said:
anksta, do you have MSN? If not, drop me an e-mail in trust. If you're looking for a new project, I'm happy to discuss some ideas if you'd like to try some collaboration.
Click to expand...

alright mate yeah I do have MSN, not used it in years though.

Give me 5 minutes. I'll email you my address or whatever now, just gotta sort some stuff out, been in London since Thursday.

edit: there's no email in your trust mate, there's one in mine, in fact I'm pretty sure the one in mine is my MSN
 
just thought I'd inform the forum (i.e. remorselessly brag) that the BBC finally replied to our emails and they are setting up a meeting for us!

Absolutely buzzing, there's a definite downside though, in that the woman who is clearly our rabbi in the department and is sorting it out for us is leaving this week, so we're going to have to charm this new person from scratch.

The first woman has seen 2 drafts of our script as well, which means she knows how much it's improved, whereas this new person will be starting from scratch and taking our most recent work as base.

My friend said I should send the new person the older draft as well which is like going "well if you think this is bad, you should see how much worse it USED to be".
 
Shouldn't you just submit what in your opinion is your best work? Everyone is different and likely as not will have/want some input.

I'm always submitting Reports and Specifications to different regions/people. All are technically correct and yet there is still the 'human factors' element including the biggest of them all - Preference! To deal with.

Go with your best instinct...oh, and congratulations.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top Bottom