Being Diagnosed with ADHD (not medical thread)

@fez again, you are seeing it as a zero sum game which is a shame but I also do this with other issues so I'm not on my high horse here.
I did literally say that I'm guilty of the same thing I'm complaining others do, not sure what else you want me to do there :)I recognise it's a double standard totally.

Everyone is entitled to their opinion and I'm glad you posted this. The double empathy problem exists because people don't engage enough and talk through these things, if they did then things would be understood better.
 
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fez said:
Also (not related to you) saying someone is on the spectrum isn't insulting, its just a common phrase now for people who aren't normal in some aspect of their personality. One of my good friends is very much on the spectrum but he is highly functioning, very intelligent and gets on well in social situations but there are definitely traits which put him on the spectrum.
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If the person in question genuinely is on the spectrum, then it's usually not an insult... though it can still be used and meant as such.

But if they're not actually on it, then it's just as much an insult as calling someone a retard, a moron, an idiot, a spaz, etc... You readily recognise those terms, right? This is just the latest addition to the family.
 
ttaskmaster said:
If the person in question genuinely is on the spectrum, then it's usually not an insult... though it can still be used and meant as such.

But if they're not actually on it, then it's just as much an insult as calling someone a retard, a moron, an idiot, a spaz, etc... You readily recognise those terms, right? This is just the latest addition to the family.
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They aren't even close to the same thing. Calling someone a spaz or a cripple etc even if they technically are is insulting which is why we don't use those words. Saying someone is on the spectrum isn't insulting and isn't meant to be. Its more akin to describing someone as quirky.
 
fez said:
They aren't even close to the same thing. Calling someone a spaz or a cripple etc even if they technically are is insulting which is why we don't use those words. Saying someone is on the spectrum isn't insulting and isn't meant to be. Its more akin to describing someone as quirky.
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I think you're on the ******* spectrum, mate...!!

See how I did that?
As if by magic, regardless of whether you really are a Speccy or not, I just made it an insult.
On the thpectwum, because your thpethul.... There's another.

Do you really need to be shown anything further, or can you now wrap your head around what ***** some people can be? It's nothing to do with the correct use of terms, or the truth of your situation - It's all about the other persons' intent and the context in which they use the terms.
 
ttaskmaster said:
I think you're on the ******* spectrum, mate...!!

See how I did that?
As if by magic, regardless of whether you really are a Speccy or not, I just made it an insult.
On the thpectwum, because your thpethul.... There's another.

Do you really need to be shown anything further, or can you now wrap your head around what ***** some people can be? It's nothing to do with the correct use of terms, or the truth of your situation - It's all about the other persons' intent and the context in which they use the terms.
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You're clutching at straws here. You can make anything insulting with the right sentence and intonation. Even things that would usually be complementary. If you think its always insulting thats fine, go for it. I don't and nor do most people from what I can tell.
 
fez said:
You're clutching at straws here. You can make anything insulting with the right sentence and intonation. Even things that would usually be complementary. If you think its always insulting thats fine, go for it. I don't and nor do most people from what I can tell.
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Do you know what I think?
You should, as I've already posted it, yet you're still starting your sentences with, "If you think..." followed by assertions that indicate you've not actually read what I said.

I suspect you've just gone off half-cocked and not understood the conversation. You're an absolute genius... and I say that, because whenever someone says it they always mean you're highly intelligent and worthy of recognition........................................................ yeah.

Clutching at straws...
www.mic.com

Here's Why We Absolutely Need to Stop Using the Term "On the Spectrum"

"Sheldon Cooper is such a funny character... he's definitely on the spectrum, though." This is the Urban Dictionary example sentence for "on the spectrum," which is defined as "a phrase used to describe a person with social tics and/or awkwardness…
www.mic.com www.mic.com
That was 2016, by the way.

"You can make anything insulting with the right sentence and intonation"
Yes, and people really do that...

"Using "autism" or "autistic" as a slur or insult is also never acceptable."
www.autismspeaks.org

Describing autism and people on the spectrum | Autism Speaks

Autistic person vs. person with autism. Click here to see how Autism Speaks utilizes both person-first (person with autism) and identity-first language (autistic person).
www.autismspeaks.org www.autismspeaks.org

The fact that such things happen often enough that people have to be told not to do it should be sufficient evidence for you.
 
ttaskmaster said:
I think you're on the ******* spectrum, mate...!!

See how I did that?
As if by magic, regardless of whether you really are a Speccy or not, I just made it an insult.
On the thpectwum, because your thpethul.... There's another.

Do you really need to be shown anything further, or can you now wrap your head around what ***** some people can be? It's nothing to do with the correct use of terms, or the truth of your situation - It's all about the other persons' intent and the context in which they use the terms.
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Can you ******* stop saying aspie and specky, they're offensive in their own right. Christ.
 
Ayahuasca said:
You're proving the point he's making.
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No - aspie, speccy, retard, spaz, these terms are specifically originated from a place of judgement and offense.

"On the spectrum" can be used 3 or more ways. Literal scientific term, "My son is on the spectrum". No bad intentions but ultimately not accurate and not helpful, "I'm a bit on the spectrum hahaha" (actually just likes quiet places and a neat orderly bedroom). "Oh don't worry about Dave he's a little bit on the spectrum", no positive connotations at all, just lazy pigeonholing.

So while the latter 2 uses both bother me (one is unintentionally ignorant and the other is low-key offensive hiding behind humour)... The last example is very much evolved from offensive use of the term, and people should stop hiding behind "It's just a turn of speech!"

You wouldn't say oh don't worry he's just a bit of a retard, when someone forgets an important fact or drops a tray of drinks. It's the same intent hiding behind the words.
 
I may be wrong, but I don't believe they were discussing it in 2 of the 3 ways you've outlined. It was all about the last one.

I can't think of many situations where people wouldn't find it offensive to be told they are on the spectrum unless you're close to them and it's some inside joke.
 
Ayahuasca said:
I may be wrong, but I don't believe they were discussing it in 2 of the 3 ways you've outlined. It was all about the last one.

I can't think of many situations where people wouldn't find it offensive to be told they are on the spectrum unless you're close to them and it's some inside joke.
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Which goes to show really though... It can be used as factual conversation but most other uses aren't particularly appropriate or helpful, regardless of intent. Whereas most of the other words discussed recently are  never appropriate or helpful. I think what I'm trying to get at is he is applying his opinion it's a negative thing, and projecting that onto all uses of the word just because it's his view of it.
 
fez said:
You're clutching at straws here. You can make anything insulting with the right sentence and intonation. Even things that would usually be complementary. If you think its always insulting thats fine, go for it. I don't and nor do most people from what I can tell.
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My favorite example of this is when the spastics society changed their name to scope, lots of kids in the 90s used "spastic" and "spaccer" as a playground insult... sadly kids can be little ****s and soon enough "scoper" was a new insult.

ttaskmaster said:
www.mic.com

Here's Why We Absolutely Need to Stop Using the Term "On the Spectrum"

"Sheldon Cooper is such a funny character... he's definitely on the spectrum, though." This is the Urban Dictionary example sentence for "on the spectrum," which is defined as "a phrase used to describe a person with social tics and/or awkwardness…
www.mic.com www.mic.com
That was 2016, by the way.
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To be fair Sheldon Cooper quite plausibly is "on the spectrum" so to speak, the show never confirmed it one way or another which is probably a sensible decision by them as it gives them some deniability in the event they inadvertently offend some militant campaigners.

LuckyBenski said:
Can you ******* stop saying aspie and specky, they're offensive in their own right. Christ.
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I don't think aspie is, there's even a society using that word:

www.aspie.org.uk

Welcome to ASPIE - ASPIE

Welcome to ASPIE ASPIE is a social, support and therapy group for adults with Asperger’s/autism (aspies). We provide a centre in Worcester where aspies feel welcome and accepted. People on the autistic spectrum, who would have previously been diagnosed with Asperger’s, often find it difficult...
www.aspie.org.uk www.aspie.org.uk
"ASPIE is a social, support and therapy group for adults with Asperger’s Syndrome (Aspies)."
 
fez said:
This seems to be getting you very worked up so I'm just going to leave it. As I said, you have your views and I have mine.
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This isn't getting me worked up. I'm just ****** off that you're assuming you know what I said and are making an argument based on that, rather than reading what I actually wrote and addressing that instead.
Doubly so, as I'd just given further explanation as to exactly what I was talking about, so you're also ignoring that in favour of your own agenda.
So yes, please do leave it at that, as you're either unwilling or unable to look beyond your own opinion and just making an ass of yourself.

LuckyBenski said:
You wouldn't say oh don't worry he's just a bit of a retard, when someone forgets an important fact or drops a tray of drinks. It's the same intent hiding behind the words.
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Aspie isn't a term I've ever used, as quite a few people use it to refer to themselves... presumably ones who do have Aspergers, but you never know.
But the point is that "on the spectrum" (once again, note the ******* quotes) is now being utilised for judgement and to offend.

And yes, retard is still in use, both as a mild pejorative between mates, and as a serious insult between those who likely aren't. The term is offensive, and people are using it to offend... shock, horror, eh!
Do you live in utter isolation, or something?

LuckyBenski said:
I think what I'm trying to get at is he is applying his opinion it's a negative thing, and projecting that onto all uses of the word just because it's his view of it.
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Am I?
Why do you think the quotes are there, then?
Are you saying misusing a term to deliberately cause offense is not a negative thing, then?
 
I refer to myself as an Aspie or a Sperg, I feel it's a bit like the 'n' word, it's ok if we say it :D I would not refer to someone else as one however.

I have also mentioned how it's not helpful when I do this in the workplace, so I really need to stop.
 
Not personally, but I know someone who is. It pretty much killed his gaming addiction and he started to focus a lot more on "productive" activities instead. Helped him tremendously at work.
 
MadMossy said:
Finally had an official diagnosis after 2+ years waiting, anyone else with ADHD taking methylphenidate? How did it affect you and what did you notice most after taking the medication?
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Yeah, got diagnosed last year and started taking it in January. Still dialling in the dosage. The one I take is slow release.

I find it definitely helps, especially with household chores, but as yet I'm not finding the dramatic impact on focus and concentration that my sister talks about (although she's on a different drug). I'm not sure whether that's just how it is for me, or whether I need to work on the dosage or try a different substance. It has had a pretty dramatic impact on my well-being though, I am much less stressed and frustrated all the time. I've also been sleeping much better, although I don't know whether that's down to the drug, just luck, or other things I've been trying.

Side effects I notice a substantial loss of appetite, and need to eat my main meal quite late in the evening. I've been losing around half a kilo a week with basically no effort, which is nice for now - I was trying to lose weight anyway - but eventually will become a problem I suppose. I had some nausea in the first week, and splitting headaches for a few days in the 3rd week, but both passed quite quickly. I often get an energy/mood crash around half-four/five in the afternoon. I know some people get given low dose quick release tablets to smooth that out but I've not asked about it yet. One weird thing I find is that while I always used to read with music on, now I find that I have to silence because I find the music distracting. It doesn't play nicely with alcohol so I've been drinking an awful lot less. I was told to take it every day while I was getting used to it which has occasionally been a nuisance, for example, when I was over in England for my Aunt's 80th and couldn't really join in the drinks and celebratory lunch everyone else was partaking of. In future, I just won't take it in situations like that.

Overall, I've found it helpful, and the side effects not too much of a problem. I think it's quite a personal thing though.
 
I've been on methylphenidate briefly but ended up on elvanse, i prefer elvanse but only slightly. It's made me productive, over the last 4.5 months i've created my own vr game which has been on patreon for 4 days and i have 27 members 13 paying. Not great stats but cool to think something i made some people think its ok. I'm more helpful around the house. I'm applying for jobs for the 1st time in many years. No way would i have done this before treatment.
 
I tried methylphenidate after my diagnosis in 2021. It helped somewhat but I didn't enjoy the side effects - just a bit more high strung and anxious, even snappy or irritable. It had tradeoffs but ultimately the side effects were middling and the benefits were small to medium, so I stopped after a year. I tried lisdexamphetamine maybe last year and felt very similar so I stopped that much faster.

Right now though I am tempted to start again as work is so very busy and I'm really struggling. The issue is that when my remaining supplies run out I'm not engaged with the prescribers to get more.
 
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