Best way to kill a computer

MadMacs said:
:confused: Whats up with the word Your
Spelt U.R (Without the dot) it comes up with 2 stars like your swearing? **

Anyways disconnect the power button?
Not the best, but it won't start!
Click to expand...

we are not a forum of t.x.t.ers, we like to read things when they are written in at least coherant english :rolleyes: :o :p
 
This is a little off topic, but it is funny.

My friend and I were messing about with this old computer and we went off to buy a new CPU for it (forgetting to check the socket type on the motherboard). We went into a bad shop, and bought a second hand CPU, only to find that it wouldn't fit when we got it home.

We took it back and said it didn't work in our computer (no lying there), and they tested it and said it did work. They said they can only take it back if it was broken. We went home.

We dropped the CPU many times on the way home, and my friend stood on it. He accidentally threw it down my street (he didn't actually mean to do this :p). We also heated it up loads with boiling water and a lamp. We were handling it in a rather haphazard manner.

Interestingly the first time we went back (after standing on it, heating it up, and generally abusing it), the shop said it was working. I found this incredibly hard to believe because I was under the impression that CPUs are easy to break.

The second time we went back (after it had been accidentally thrown down the street), the shop said it was broken, and then refused to refund me (only about £40 [but still it was a waste]). I was a bit annoyed as all they told us was that it couldn't be refunded unless it was broken. :p

My advice to the original poster (if they haven't succeeded yet), is to possibly remove the CPU, and snap off a few of the pins on it. This is not be noticeable if you reattach the CPU, and nobody will know what has gone wrong. :p

Angus Higgins
 
Amonlym said:
more seriously - way uncool :( try and create a business case if you really think you need a more powerfull pc.
Click to expand...

I agree with this. While I've no doubt it's hugely frustrating working on a machine with 128Mb, giving business reasons for an upgrade seems like a better idea. Additionally, every place I've ever worked in that has something to do with computers ALWAYS has redundant sticks of RAM shoved in a drawer somewhere that no one needs. Try and see if you can find something like that to plug in.
 
Short of going through a multitude of dodgey websites trying to pick up virus' and hoping they can do some damage. I guess running a few instance of orthos/super pi and a few other programs at the same time. Really depends how much damage you want to do, as many things can be replaced, from reading the thread it seems that mobo+cpu+psu would be the best bet, but if you work in a company that specialises in building PC's I'm not sure that purposfully destroying a PC is the best bet, as they'd probably use some form of diagnostic tools and maybe even some of them reading these forums.
 
is the bios locked???

I would yank the HDD out while the pc is in operation. Never fails to **** up my pc :( ;) :D

How about moving the kettle lead in the back of the pc. keep shorting it.

(eg move it backwards and forth a tiny bit, so you can hear crackling...) :D

Just twist a capacitor of :D


I did this on a Playstaition 2/pc converter. The noise it made...
 
Lads have you forgotten our good freind H20 wait till its friday evening and you are just about to go home accidentlly remove the side of the case and some how accidently manage to drop some water on the motherboard so its nice and wet, leave it all weekend to dry out and then first thing monday morning when you try to boot up BOOOOOMM. Should take out the lot LOL.
 
remove cpu, put in microwave for 5 seconds, re-install cpu... it wont work, and the mocrowave doesnt have enough time to go bang :D

(my mate does this with mobile phnes when he wants a new one :rolleyes: - and no, i don't mean 'me' :p)

EDIT:
pumaz said:
Install Vista ;)
Click to expand...

i actually 'lol'ed at that... fantastic reply dude
 
Last edited:
throwing water on it and then leaving to dry all weekend is only likely to have 1 possible mode of failure im afraid - total failure todo any damage atall, unless it gets inside the hdd.

again, i would say dont be stupid. if you get caught doing this kind of thing, its criminal damage, grounds for instance dismissal, and no hope of getting a reference from that employer. all verrrry bad things for future employment
 
can you not get into the bios on the pc, theres plenty in there 2 mess up that will cause it not to work....change EVERY single options you can find = one messed up pc

or you could write a batch file to run as part of the pc bootup so that it ends the winlogon.exe service so every time windows loads it will blue screen the pc

(I will write the batch file for you if you don't know how)
 
Try and solder a calculator into the motherboard, and when questioned, say you were "upgrading it" :D
 
greeny_fastcar said:
This thread is everything I hate about my job... Some numpty trying to kill a machine so they get a "better" one.

If you have that machine it must be for a reason? Companys low on cash, IT don't have anything better for you?


Meh, morning rants. ;)
Click to expand...

I'm sorry I have to agree with this guy. I know you said that they have loads of money but when you hear this 20+ times a day from people that have nothing wrong with their pc but are just bored it washes over you.
Just keep on mentioning it everytime you talk or see them thats what people do at our place to me, it takes a while but my boss eventually gives in if its due for replacement within a reasonable time/same financial year.
 
If its windows XP all you need to do is corrupt the ntfs.sys file... unless your IT dept is really really on the ball (and most are useless) they will never be able to reinstall the OS without replacing the HDD... (and to the all but the most experienced tech it looks like a full on hardware failure).

TIP for anyone ever in this horrible situation you need a copy of the windows server 2003 install disc (you can download and burn a trial version from MS) it will allow you to get into the repair option from setup and run chkdsk to clear the problem - after which you can reinstall from a regular windows XP disc...
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top Bottom