Calling for 'a chat'

Kamerad said:
One day your mother won't be there anymore and you will regret this.
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First thing I thought. I understand where the OP is coming from, sometimes I get impatient with people particularly my mum

One day sooner or later though I know I'm going to need it or miss it.

It's similar with my kids. They sometimes moan at going to see my grand mother.

They don't realise how lucky they are to have a great-grandmother, ufortunately they won't realise it until she's long dead. One of life's tricks it seems.
 
I guess parents (mothers in particular) just like to stay in touch with their kids. My mum calls me occasionally for a chat, but i only usually ever call for anniversaries.
I dont think my mum was too impressed when she discovered that my sister and i hadnt spoken in 6 years. Not that we dont get on, just that we dont call eachother for chit-chat.
 
Definitely the women who do it most. I know a few that phone me up randomly, even at stupid times, but I don't really mind it tbh. The most recent call lasted three hours!
 
My mum died when I was 23, my dad when I was 33 and I'm now 46 so have not had this for a long time.

I spoke to my mum quite regularly and my dad not quite as often after my mum died, but I kept in touch and visited fairly often.

If I spoke to them now I would probably crap myself.
 
The worst time is when you call a parent, foolishly thinking it will be a quick conversation. An hour later, you're banging your head against the wall whilst your dad tries to remember a childhood friends name he hasn't thought of in 35 years. By the time he's remembered, he's forgotten the story he was telling.

Rinse and repeat, every bloody weekend.
 
I'm lucky with my mum as we don't really do 'small talk', we are very similar in the sense that small talk tends to sap us dry so we often end up talking about anything from politics to the origins of the universe, had a pretty rough up bringing but I thank the gods at the least most of our family discussions growing up we're pretty intellectually stimulating.
 
I don't do phone calls really unless its for something that would be stupid to text. When I am on the phone its for a purpose of sorting or organising something. I treat it the same way I do shopping for myself, I know what I want and will get straight to it so its sorted and I can then move onto the next task.

I'll happily chat crap with mates and family in person but I just can't do it on the phone, I don't feel relaxed enough and keep walking around aimlessly until I hang up.
 
Don't tend to 'ring up for a chat' to anyone nowadays, rather send a text or arrange a meetup face-to-face, or just pop round for a quick catch-up.

Keeping in touch with my mum is important to me though, she moved to the west country a decade ago, and she's been through a hell of a lot recently, so even though the conversation can drag and be mindless small talk on her part for the majority of it, it's showing her support that she needs & appreciates.

That said I don't ring up and speak to people half as much as I used to, I think all the other instant and non-demanding methods of contact and social media has diluted the usefulness of a phone-call personally.

Then there are the people, for example my girlfriend & her mum, who insist on calling each other up on a near daily basis, to discuss the most trivial of everyday events, what they had for breakfast, what they are planning for dinner later, etc etc. :confused:

The topic of conversation between them sometimes extends to this or that person has had a baby, got a new job, getting married, had an accident, the usual small-town news that I just don't get or care for. I suppose it comes from growing up in an area where there's a tangible community connection, everyone knows what everyone else is doing.

Us city folk have a more anonymous way of life, but it can also breed isolation which is very bad for mental health! So I think it's good to have a balance, if you are less sociable type, make an effort with people, and be tolerant of those who just 'want a chat', you'll regret it when these 'annoying' people can't be bothered making all the effort to keep in touch anymore.

If you are the more sociable type and are struggling to get your friend or family to keep up appearances, have a little patience, not everyone enjoys social situations and some people have genuine anxiety caused by particularly overwhelming social contact, everyone is different! :cool:
 
lowrider007 said:
I'm lucky with my mum as we don't really do 'small talk', we are very similar in the sense that small talk tends to sap us dry so we often end up talking about anything from politics to the origins of the universe, had a pretty rough up bringing but I thank the gods at the least most of our family discussions growing up we're pretty intellectually stimulating.
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Wow, that's pretty much the same as me and my mum, after a while topics fall into one of 3 categories. UFO's, Politics and Religion. And when it gets to that point we can go on for hours.
 
colzboppo said:
Don't tend to 'ring up for a chat' to anyone nowadays, rather send a text or arrange a meetup face-to-face, or just pop round for a quick catch-up.
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This, I hate chatting over the phone, even to my closest friends.

Parents are in SA, so Skype every now and then, which is more like a real face to face than over the phone any way.
 
If my parents ring I'm happy to talk to them, have a good chat find out what's new tell them how things are going with me.

but anyone else does my head in. I don't like talking on the phone for no reason I've got better things to be doing.
 
I hate phone calls as well. I can't understand how people can call up parents/friends everyday and chat about **** for hours? My day consists of going to work, coming home from work, an activity in the evening, then bed.
Once a week maybe but even that's pushing it! In person however it's fine, it's far easier!
 
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