chronic anxiety

koolpc said:
It truly amazes me how people who have never suffered from Anxiety or Depression think it is a wimpy illness!! I have heard and seen that a few times with friends and family.
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Being honest the only people that know your own pain are people that have been through the same thing & even then there surroundings & upbringing will make it different for everyone suffering from that particular illness.

There's no way a bloke like me who is over confident will ever understand a grown man being scared of things like going out/shopping/haircuts & the like but that doesn't mean I can't sympathise. In fact more than that I have helped a couple of mates with Anxiety issues just by being my over confident self. Apparently it gave them the opportunity to do things they wouldn't normally do by being in my Shadow so to speak. They know I'm always up front & have a big gob so they're are not under any pressure to do anything at all apart from stand there. These days I know when they are having probs as they ring me & I go over for some Loud Malc time, It's no cure but they have an outlet & somebody to call on to do the things they are not comfortable doing alone.
Lastly I have Always taken the **** out of everything & anyone including myself it's just a way I handle uncomfortable or emotional topics like a coping mechanism, I'd rather laugh at myself & others than cry or get bogged down with emotions it's just how I am. :)
 
baldmonk said:
anyone else here suffer from anxiety ?,and has anyone managed to overcome it ? if so how :)

I've suffered for the last ten years :( started with a panic attack every few weeks but very manageable to where i am now 10 years later.i have been on many meds some worked some didn't the last of which was mirtazapine at the highest dose for 3.5 years :eek: it got to the point where it wasn't as effective so the dr told me to switch meds but did not want to taper me off and on so took me off over 2 weeks which made me ill with withdrawal symptoms :mad: been off work on and off over last 2 months (4 days at work) on and off diazepam.im now on new meds which are making me feel terrible.ive had cbt which didn't help and now i just need to find something that will work :)
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Yes, first started by going out for a drive with one of the care workers from the crisis team, then after getting settled with 2 care workers started going out with them to the gym, or to play squash or to go for a walk through town once then twice a week then started going out a bit more with parents/on my own.

After about a year signed up for an apprentiship and turned my life around now, I'm happily confident out and about and got a good job

As you start doing it more it becomes more natural and easier they days you feel like you really can't bare to go out, go dtand in your back garden at least make a promise you'll go out at least once every day

How does your anxiety affect you though are you basically house bound or is it more pressure of having to work/ achieve results that gets you?
 
Guys may I ask, as a lot of you have experience from that position, in how others should approach you.

For example my brother suffers from chronic anxiety (and probably a host of other stuff) and it seems impossible to get him to do anything depending on when you catch him. For example he has missed his best friends wedding today, he was suppose to be best man (best friends from childhood). Just locked himself away. He hasn't had a haircut or shave in weeks, been asking him all week to get a hair cut but no nothing. Buy a suit, he reluctantly went at the last minute after days of asking him, and now hes missed the wedding anyway.

At the moment it's just us I guess pestering him to do something, which he will randomly do or wont do. Anything we can suggest him to do to get some control or any advice on how we should approach things?
 
You can't make me do anything when I'm in that frame of mind. You just have to let them know you are there for them when they decide to come out, but do keep reminding them of this. Actually shutting yourself away makes it harder to come out so try and offer some small goals, such as making it downstairs, going for a drive but not getting out of the car, things like that. Sometimes I will go to the supermarket but wait in the car :/

If having his hair cut is so important, can you suggest a mobile hairdresser to him?

Shame he missed the wedding, he must be in a very bad place at the moment. Remember he is probably frustrating himself at least as much as he is frustrating you too.
 
Craterloads said:
At the moment it's just us I guess pestering him to do something, which he will randomly do or wont do. Anything we can suggest him to do to get some control or any advice on how we should approach things?
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He needs to work on:

- Get into a routine where you get enough proper sleep. Go to bed on time, e.g. 11pm every night. This allows brain to replenish neurotransmitter levels and maintain itself. This will bring greater confidence and energy.

- Diet. You must be eating properly. Get healthy foods in to keep brain in good shape, e.g. blueberries, mackerel, nuts, avocado. Research this and tweek diet.

- Exercise. He must take exercise to feel more relaxed and confident. I suggest mountain biking, half an hour to an hour a day.

To get started, set him some challenges, and give him something fun to get him out the house and active, e.g. going go karting, or a fun bike ride in a new place.

Good luck.
 
burtie said:
I've had anxiety problems for 15 years. Alcohol has helped, now I'm an alcoholic.
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Unfortunately this is the totally wrong thing to be doing with an anxiety problem. If you have anxiety, it's best to give up alcohol completely. Drinking alcohol will deplete the brains natural neurotransmitter levels in the key areas of the brain that give you drive and confidence, so it will make you even more shy and cripple your confidence. It's best to give up alcohol completely and work on your diet and exercise.
 
burtie said:
I've had anxiety problems for 15 years. Alcohol has helped, now I'm an alcoholic.
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Been there. I used to bring a can of beer into the shower with me because I needed it to make sure I didn't freak out. Stopping drinking helped a lot as the hangovers were terrible for the anxiety
 
Hi mate. Hang in there, things do and will get better! I felt as if I was in a black hole and couldn't get out for ages. If i think back I can't really remember large parts of my life including the birth and early years of my daughter, and my marriage. In fact I broke down whilst doing my wedding speech!
When I think back a lot seemed to happen to me in a short space of time, we lost our first child and my nan died shortly afterwards which seemed to trigger the anxiety attacks. I was hospitalised for a few days because it really did feel like a heart attack!
Managed to get myself to the doctors who prescribed some counselling and propranolol first I think. These made me very tired and couldn't stay awake, so change me to citalopram.
I think what helped the most was counciling and going to the gym. We were having some money troubles at the time too which went helping so I had some great advise and managed to sort my debts out, Infact I became debt free this month!
I'm on no drugs now, feeling great, but still get the feeling I'm going to have a panic attack every now and then. I just breath through it and just take a minute, the feeling passes.
If you need help, or someone to talk to don't hesitate to message me.
 
4T5 said:
Being honest the only people that know your own pain are people that have been through the same thing & even then there surroundings & upbringing will make it different for everyone suffering from that particular illness.

There's no way a bloke like me who is over confident will ever understand a grown man being scared of things like going out/shopping/haircuts & the like but that doesn't mean I can't sympathise. In fact more than that I have helped a couple of mates with Anxiety issues just by being my over confident self. Apparently it gave them the opportunity to do things they wouldn't normally do by being in my Shadow so to speak.
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I'm not sure you understand it, it isn't just about being shy or lacking confidence. You can have plenty of confidence socially and still end up with anxiety.

You could be working in a high pressured job, lots of stress etc.. and start waking up in the middle of the night covered in sweat with your heart racing. you still go to work normally, act your usual self but the heart racing stuff carries on, you start getting muscle twitching/tightness which causes pain in your chest, between your ribs - you get heart palpitations/fluttering... even sitting down at your desk your heart just decides to spaz out for a couple of seconds then back to normal... which then causes your pulse to raise/adds to the stress.

It doesn't have to involve being nervous around people or being scared of going to the shops - it can arise from any number of things - I went to a GP walk in centre in the city when I had a run of palpitations at work, talked about the waking up at night with my heart racing etc.. and she told me it was one of the most common things they deal with - most of their patients are people working in banks, brokerages etc.. not exactly shy wallflower types.
 
Craterloads said:
At the moment it's just us I guess pestering him to do something, which he will randomly do or wont do. Anything we can suggest him to do to get some control or any advice on how we should approach things?
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Though I'm not a big fan of organised religion it might well help in this instance? Would he listen to a local religious leader? I mean I could imagine that if the relative of some church going family was really struggling in a CofE parish then the local vicar might be of some help - could the same work here, if it was perhaps a local cleric talking to him calmly and telling him he should seek some counselling - perhaps he might be more inclined to listen to them and also they're probably used to talking to people in these sorts of situations.
 
I had terrible problems with panic attacks. The first time I had one I genuinely thought I was going to die. I got them most days, particularly on the train on the way home from work.

I managed to overcome them through sitting there allowing the feelings to just exist (very, very hard initially) and also through meditation. I haven't had one in many years now.

I still suffer a little with general anxiety.
 
I suffer depression and anxiety also im currently using fluoxetine which has side effects but being able to clear my head on demand and get on with my day is 100% worth it.

I became what you would call an alcoholic at 19 years old, drank any hours i wasn't at work whilst i worked away from home for afew months, came home and kicked alcohol and got sober i cannot drink more than 2 pints now without feeling like death and a hangover killing me for 2 days after it.

Im aware my lifestyle over the past 5 months has caused it to major flare back up but i have plans to get back to the gym and keep myself occupied again, Both of these things are all about routine in my experience, EAT, SLEEP And EXERCISE helps so much. Don't just drink coke or coffee, drink water, juice or even milkshakes to cut the caffeine out. Eat at set times (this helped so much for me i don't know why) and sleep at a set time also. You would be amazed how much better you feel for sleeping from 11pm-8am exactly. I actually use an app on my phone called sleep as android which tracks your movements and tries to accurately wake you when your not in REM cycle and only in light sleep after my 8-9 hours. Id recommend it.

I hope you can find something which works for yourself however u manage it, i hope the mods don't shut this thread as a lot of advice on here could be deemed helpful
 
radderfire said:
He needs to work on:

- Get into a routine where you get enough proper sleep. Go to bed on time, e.g. 11pm every night. This allows brain to replenish neurotransmitter levels and maintain itself. This will bring greater confidence and energy.

- Diet. You must be eating properly. Get healthy foods in to keep brain in good shape, e.g. blueberries, mackerel, nuts, avocado. Research this and tweek diet.

- Exercise. He must take exercise to feel more relaxed and confident. I suggest mountain biking, half an hour to an hour a day.

To get started, set him some challenges, and give him something fun to get him out the house and active, e.g. going go karting, or a fun bike ride in a new place.

Good luck.
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Thanks, i'm gonna get him to join gym and take it from there.

His sleep and caffeine intake is just silly at the moment, he's having redbulls daily yet all he does is lie in bed most days, like who does that !! We've hidden all coffee in the house, but cant exactly stop him buying cans of the stuff.

He's actually plucked up the courage to go to the wedding, 2 hours late, wearing the wrong clothes and looking a bit like a cave man but its a start :)

dowie said:
Though I'm not a big fan of organised religion it might well help in this instance? Would he listen to a local religious leader? I mean I could imagine that if the relative of some church going family was really struggling in a CofE parish then the local vicar might be of some help - could the same work here, if it was perhaps a local cleric talking to him calmly and telling him he should seek some counselling - perhaps he might be more inclined to listen to them and also they're probably used to talking to people in these sorts of situations.
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We have tried at the beginning but even local mosque imam pretty much said he needs medical / psychological treatment. His crisis care worker suggested it so we went down that route.
 
Craterloads - have you thought about contacting say MIND yourself. They may be best placed to offer you advice without you extending personal information onto the internet etc.

Just a thought but may be worth a try for some tailored advice specific to your circumstances and those of your brother: http://www.mind.org.uk/
 
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