Constructive Criticism Wanted

Zebede

Zebede

Zebede

Associate
Joined
21 Aug 2003
Posts
800
Hey all, i've just put together a song, and had a bash at recording it with sequenced drums + bass.
I was wondering if you could check it over and give comments/recommendations on what I could do with it.
There are no vocals as I have no microphone but the synth is playing what the vocals would 'play' if they were there.
Thanks. :)

Clicky.

P.S. I apologise for the large file size.
 
Some of the chords in there are not particularly pleasing to the human ears, so I would try swapping them for something with an unusual vibe as you are obviously aiming for this, but something less 'difficult' sounding. As it is, the chords sound 'wrong'.

All in all the idea has a lot of potential :)
 
If this is your very first attempt at home recording then its excellent.

The drums are a bit static and need a bit more programming to make them exciting.
You already know the lead line synth sounds wazz and I look forward to the vocals.
The music itself needs filling out with perhaps an acoustic guitar, piano or Fender Rhodes sound.
 
Meh, I tried a thread like this a week or two back and I only got one person replying...yours has been up for not too long, and you've got two replies (three when I hit the button) already! Life isn't fair. :p


The song isn't really my type of thing, but I'd say try to make the guitar stand out a little more in the mix...it seems a little thin sounding, kinda brittle. Other than that, I've not got much to say, really. :o
 
tTz said:
Meh, I tried a thread like this a week or two back and I only got one person replying...yours has been up for not too long, and you've got two replies (three when I hit the button) already! Life isn't fair. :p
Click to expand...

Sorry, make that four :D

My suggestion (not meant to offend so please hear me out)

It's currently a little uneventful as a song and a little clean sounding for my liking, it's difficult to tell what kind of track you are aiming for in its present state. Ideas to improve on it in my opinion is to get some really pronnounced wah on the guitar and also bring it to the front a little more, if you have any way of doing it at all I'd record the bass live and drop the sequenced bass line add a little dirt to the bass sound as well and as dmpoole suggested, get an organ part of some description, my choice would be some nice cheesy Hammond kind of thing. It's amazing the difference real drums and bass can make to a track. Funk it up to hell :cool:

suggested listening:


Hope this helps :)
 
It actually makes quite a nice backing track :)

I really like it, my only request would be to de-fuzz the guitar solo a bit because its quite mucky.
 
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Thanks for your input guys. :)

Having re-listened to it a fair few times I agree with what you've said about the song and i'm going to try to improve it over the next few days.

Sorry tTz :p, post the link to the file in here if you want, i'd love to check out what styles/techniques other people use to record.
 
Zebede said:
Sorry tTz :p, post the link to the file in here if you want
Click to expand...


Heh, nah, this is your thread. I wasn't offended by no one posting in my thread or anything, don't worry about it. :p


I'd quite like to hear what becomes of this one, if you re-record it. Have you got lyrics already, or are you still working on those?



banja said:
Sorry to go OT, but how do you upload an mp3 like this, so that it plays in that separate window?
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This post confuses me, since it doesn't open in a new window for me. :p

Admittedly, it opens in a new tab, so maybe that's what banja means...
 
For a first recording thats good - lay off the 80's effects tho - ie turn down the echo maybe and get rid of the synthesiser!
 
Chrisp7 said:
a) Its 2007 not the 80's now
b) in my opnion 80's = mostly awful!
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Oi ! The 80`s rocked or bopped? not sure. Not a bad tune for a first time i must say. I agree with all the posts here. Have a go at tampering with it a little.

Previously mentioned. Makes a greta backing track. I was playing it while reading up on some stuff. Very relaxing.

Thumbs up dude.
 
Again, many thanks for all your comments, i'm taking them on board and re-recording the song soon with vocals.

To tTz, I already have the lyrics written, I just need the facilities to record them.

To banja, I merely uploaded the .mp3 file to my webspace and linked straight to it in my post, I didn't even realise it would play in a new window.

Also, oi, the '80s rocked. :p
 
banja said:
Ah thanks. I don't have any webspace, so that's out. However, I put a new track up on Myspace instead. Perhaps give it a listen?

http://forums.overclockers.co.uk/showthread.php?t=17742497
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Eyes is excellent - very Tom Petty.
The solo is perfect.
I would have had an acoustic in there and instead of strum chords I'd fingerpick them but it will all sound different with vocals.
Have you wrote lyrics for it? - if so send them with a 320 bit MP3 and all the times of the verses, choruses etc within the song.
I'm on holiday soon and I wouldn't mind putting my best pop voice over that for you.
 
dmpoole said:
Eyes is excellent - very Tom Petty.
The solo is perfect.
I would have had an acoustic in there and instead of strum chords I'd fingerpick them but it will all sound different with vocals.
Have you wrote lyrics for it? - if so send them with a 320 bit MP3 and all the times of the verses, choruses etc within the song.
I'm on holiday soon and I wouldn't mind putting my best pop voice over that for you.
Click to expand...

Thanks for the response. Checking out your music too right now. Which one is you in that rather frightening picture? :) I see you do Rainbow, do you do 'Since You've Been Gone'? I think the solo for that is spot on.

I'll get back to you about Lyrics :)

Perhaps any more comment should go in my thread though, I don't want to TJ the OP's thread further (sorry)

Speaking of which, I quite like the atmosphere of the track. Starts off a bit like Omar, 'There Nothing Like This' The guitar goes a little out of time about a third of the way in, and perhaps there's a little too much delay for my taste, but it shows promise.
 
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