CV Help Please

peter212693

peter212693

peter212693

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Joined
28 Jan 2005
Posts
1,698
Location
Southport
Hi all, I’m 18 and have just finished college and am now looking for a top as an IT Technician. My uncle knows of a job available in the company he works for, just what I would like to do, IT Technician/Networking. Here is my CV can you have a look and let me know what you think and what you would change ;)

Thanks, all comments (good or bad) welcome :)

CV
 
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No disrespect but it looks horrible. Lose the borders and boxes it looks a bit tacky.

A personal profile should be written from a third person perspective so it should never contain "I...". It is also a little long, try to make it short and punchy.

On the whole a CV should be two complete pages long you have twice that. The qualifications you should emphasize on should be relevant. Shorten the hobbies and interests it can give you something to talk about in an interview.

Don't take it the wrong way some may love it. If you need help give me a shout I use to write them for long term unemployed/college leavers.
 
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First things first. You MUST fit all the info into 2 pages max. This will require a lot of reformatting. Do this first, re-upload it and then we can analyse it properly.
 
Third Opinion said:
No disrespect but it looks horrible. Lose the borders and boxes it looks a bit tacky.

A personal profile should be written from a third person perspective so it should never contain "I...". It is also a little long, try to make it short and punchy.

On the whole a CV should be two complete pages long you have twice that. The qualifications you should emphasize on should be relevant. Shorten the hobbies and interests it can give you something to talk about in an interview.

Don't take it the wrong way some may love it. If you need help give me a shout I use to write them for long term unemployed/college leavers.
Click to expand...


Is this getting any better now.....

Take 2
 
peter212693 said:
Is this getting any better now.....

Take 2
Click to expand...


Its still too long. You really need to get it onto 2 pages or less. Also combination of information in boxes, and some not makes it looks disjointed and hard to read. I would also move your qualifications before your skills section. You will also want to include where and when you did your qualifications. Also scrap the module information in the btec section IMO.
 
Information in your CV just isn't presented clearly.
There are too many long paragraphs, and your "work experience" is cluttered into two big paragraphs... why not lay it out in the same way as "employment history" where you can see the company name and start and end dates, followed by bullet-points of your responsibilities.
Have a seperate heading for your "BTEC National Diploma" with start and end dates and where you studied it, instead of mentioning it in a paragraph.
You seem to use [edit] italics and underline for headings and subheadings. It's a bit hard to follow.
 
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tenchi-fan said:
Information in your CV just isn't presented clearly.
There are too many long paragraphs, and your "work experience" is cluttered into two big paragraphs... why not lay it out in the same way as "employment history" where you can see the company name and start and end dates, followed by bullet-points of your responsibilities.
Have a seperate heading for your "BTEC National Diploma" with start and end dates and where you studied it, instead of mentioning it in a paragraph.
You seem to use [edit] italics and underline for headings and subheadings. It's a bit hard to follow.
Click to expand...


SO should be like so..

Details
Personal Statement
Work Exp.
Qualifications
Skills
Vol. work
Refs.

??
 
Ok, I'm going to attepmt to make some constructive criticism as it's very bad!

1) Is have a full driving licence a key skill?

2) Why are you indenting paragraphs on a word document?

3) I would in fact get rid of the paragraphs altogether, bullet points are much more effective at getting your point across in this sort of document.

4) I would personally put education first, followed by work experience, followed by skills and then references.

3) No need to list all your GCSE's, a simple 7 GCSE's gained at grade b-c, including maths B; English B.

4) No need to list references full details, simple name and job title will suffice ( I like it how you put their full numbers on the internet!)

5) Do you really need your age on there? I'm sure they can work that out from your DOB ;)

6) Personl profile is much too waffley, two to three lines max, employers WILL get bored reading all that, and more than likely not read it at when they see the length of it.

7) Work experience needs laying out better.

8) Get rid of those boxes and refer back to point 3

I'll think of some more......
 
peter212693 said:
SO should be like so..

Details
Personal Statement
Qualifications
Work Experience (I'd personally use Vol work as part of work experience. Also make sure that you put dates on that you worked in particular roles)
Skills - make them relevent to something, so what if you have team working skills, what benefit does that have? Tell them.
References

??
Click to expand...
 
Where's your CV gone, all I can see is a couple of boxes with writing in it!

Give me your e-mail address and I'll send you mine as an idea as to what I would class as an ok CV.
 
peter212693 said:
Hows this....

Take 3
Click to expand...


Its getting there. Now I want to know when you did the qualifications and where you did them. als othe Key skills seem a bit too 'buzz wordy' if you know what I mean. Can you back any of that stuff up with experiences? ie, Duke of Edinburgh award, voluntary work etc.
 
http://www.upload2.net/page/download/Tv8Zr8OWqydfRNJ/CV+revamp.doc.html



Try to remove all the "I" in the paragraphs, Also you start two consecutive sentences with "I am". Try not to repeat things like this.

Also Key skills should be right under name and address. Its the first thing. It needs to be customized to what the advert is looking at.

Also if you have D.O.B you don't need age.

Edit- New1
http://www.upload2.net/page/download/UGPCCTisyiqLu7K/CV+revamp.doc.html

Key skills should be more detailed something like:
Ø Flexible and independent worker
Ø Proven adaptability and ability to integrate as a team
Ø Professional, presentable, dynamic
Ø Excellent IT skills and knowledge with theoretical depth
Ø Good knowledge of Windows XP, NT, ME, 2k
Ø Persistently demonstrated good reliability and time keeping
Ø Applied knowledge in Visual Studio .Net
Ø Working knowledge of Visual Basic .Net, XML, Asp .Net, CSS, ISS, SSL certificates, Java, C++
Ø Experienced in databases: MS SQL Sever2000, Oracle 9i, Access
Click to expand...
 
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AcidHell2 said:
http://www.upload2.net/page/download/Tv8Zr8OWqydfRNJ/CV+revamp.doc.html



Try to remove all the "I" in the paragraphs, Also you start two consecutive sentences with "I am". Try not to repeat things like this.

Also Key skills should be right under name and address. Its the first thing. It needs to be customized to what the advert is looking at.

Also if you have D.O.B you don't need age.
Click to expand...


How would you word that personal profile then mate not to great at that sort of thing. :rolleyes:
 
peter212693 said:
How would you word that personal profile then mate not to great at that sort of thing. :rolleyes:
Click to expand...

I am keen to begin my career within the IT support industry as I feel that my friendly and dynamic personality gives a good grounding for this type of position. This, in combination with my extensive, comprehensive knowledge of computer hardware and my BTEC National Diploma for ICT Practitioners, makes me the perfect candidate for this role.

Something along those lines
 
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