chopchop said:
i refuse to post a girl related thread and u seem to know your **** so id rather msn it
add me if u dont want others to see your addy, i think its in my trust profile ?
Please sir, I am not a therapist.
I don't mind replying to threads, I love it, because I can compose my replies at my own leisure, and because they stand as a record to which I can refer to in the future, as can others for it is available for all to see, but I just don't have the time to Chat one on one.
Its just not in the same community spirit that the Boards represent.
mejinks said:
Thanks. I really vlaue input like this. I never intended to start this thread as a "im too scared to talk to her what should I do" thread, so I think im going to go out with her on Tuesday, ask about her life in a general sort of way and mention her BF casually.
I think something along the lines of "its so nice to get out and have dinner as a treat once in a while" If she says something along the lines of "lets do it more often then Im going for it.
If however the answer is negative or not as rosy, well, theres dinner with this other girl the day after.
Or failing that a night out with the girl I actually do want to go out with.
If all else fails Palmela Handerson still loves me
Lets suppose just for one moment and imagine you're in her position. She goes to you to escape her Boyfriend. Think about that. She goes to you to escape her Boyfriend. She goes to you, to get what she cannot get from her Boyfriend. She, goes, to, you .... to, escape, boyfriend ...
Imagine you are her, and put yourself in her position .... Infact, its better to relate it differently, because we're blokes.
Imagine you've just come out of an exam that was absolutely torturous! The questions were incredibly hard, you were sweating, your heart was racing with fear ... it dragged on for hours and hours and hours and hours ... it was as if time stood still while you were in that exam hall ... so much of your life rests on this ... but then ... suddenly ... the examiner quietly says, "Pens down" ... and at that moment, you can relax and let out that sigh ... that sigh that its over ... that symbolic moment when you can forget the past 2 hours and look forward to an evening of fun and excitement with your friends, who make you feel absolutely fantastic and great ... a complete contrast to your last surrounding ... So you go somewhere fun, and all your friends are there ... but instead of having a fun and exciting time ... all your friends can talk about is the exam you just took, and they go on and on about it, and they make you relive the bad experience of the exam ... when all you want to do is unwind and relax and have fun ! How would you feel? You'd feel terrible ... you don't want to talk about the exam, you'll do anything to avoid the topic. All you want to do is have a fun and exciting time ...
See the moral of the fairy tale?
This girls boyfriend is that exam. You are her fun and excitement. She does not want to relive the experiences of the Boyfriend. She wants the live the experiences of fun and excitement with you! Thats why she doesn't want to talk about her Boyfriend. Thats why "talking things through" is a load of nonsense. No one, especially women, want to relive bad experiences. Particularly with people they specifically spend time with because they make them feel great and fantastic experiences, like you make her feel.
Do you honestly feel that she wishes to go to dinner with you and spend time with you, so you can discuss how useless and inept her Boyfriend is and how he makes her feel emotionally dead like a China dolly, very pretty, but empty inside, does she? No ... She most certainly does not want to hear that. I challenge any Woman on this Board to say otherwise ... infact, if any dared to, I'll put them out of the misery myself!
.
bloody women 
