Declining offer

[aspiring]

A company interviewed me almost 3 months ago. Initial chats were good but once I discussed package expectations they went very quiet. Few weeks later they said they are still thinking about my expectations and for me to wait patiently. In the meantime they started to advertise the role again. When I checked in they said they could offer what I was asking.

After many postponements they have finally decided to take me to last stage.
However, I am not sure the role is right for me.

If I go to last stage interview but decline should they offer, will it look bad? I feel I will only know if role is right once I have this final assessment.

 

[peterwalkley]

They keep you dangling for 3 months and you still care what they might think if you turn them down?
An interview process cuts both ways. They don't care about you in the slightest when it comes to a rejection, so do what is right for you.

 

[jaybee]

Look bad on who? Nobody Mcnobody? Who's ever going to know? You're not going to write that you declined 5 offers on your CV are you?

 

[aspiring]

They keep you dangling for 3 months and you still care what they might think if you turn them down?
An interview process cuts both ways. They don't care about you in the slightest when it comes to a rejection, so do what is right for you.

It is just I work in small industry, would they bad mouth me

 

[jaybee]

It is just I work in small industry, would they bad mouth me

No. People decline offers all the time. Businesses expect it. Circumstances/life/other offers. The very fact it has been 3 months in itself is bad on their side and would send alarm bells to me. Why do they need to take 3 months plus whatever your notice period is? Who has time to take potentially 6 months to recruit?

 

[skyripper]

You're not their first choice, their first choice has let them down or they haven't found the candidate they really want. Stuff them.

 

[peterwalkley]

It is just I work in small industry, would they bad mouth me

No.

- You're not important enough for them to take the time to do it. What can they even say anyway - 'aspiring didn't bow down and tug his forelock in gratitude when we threw them the bone of a job offer'.
- Talking someone down isn't a good look when pitching for business. They should be showing what value they can add, not trashing everyone else. Any client with a brain would be seeing red flags there.
- If they stray from the simple truth (you turned down an offer) then they would be opening themselves up to legal action for slander.

 

[Screeeech]

Business is business - from your side as well as theirs, you have to do what’s best for you.

Remember, if the boot was on the other foot - they’d do what’s best for them and not feel bad.

 

[sigma]

The interview and job application is a two way-process. You're more than entitled to say no.

 

[HangTime]

Even ignoring this 3 month holding pattern, no it wont look bad if you decline after the final stage. The whole point of an interview process is to determine fit for both parties. Either or both parties might not like what they hear in the final stage - otherwise what's the point in having it? Changing your mind, i.e. accepting a job and then backing out is more of a grey area, because that can waste their time, they might reject other candidates once you have accepted their offer. But pre offer stage, it's fine for either party to exit the process.

What I would recommend is using this final stage to discuss any doubts you have, ask pertinent questions etc. Many years ago, I was a bit wary of 'putting off' potential employers but now I'm a lot more up front. I'll explicitly state things like "If you are looking for XYZ, then I'm maybe not the right person, I position myself more as ABC". This might ultimately lead to fewer job offers but it also should reduce the chance of taking the wrong job with misaligned expectations.

Basically you want to come out of the final stage with a clear view on whether you want the job or not.

 

[aspiring]

Even ignoring this 3 month holding pattern, no it wont look bad if you decline after the final stage. The whole point of an interview process is to determine fit for both parties. Either or both parties might not like what they hear in the final stage - otherwise what's the point in having it? Changing your mind, i.e. accepting a job and then backing out is more of a grey area, because that can waste their time, they might reject other candidates once you have accepted their offer. But pre offer stage, it's fine for either party to exit the process.

What I would recommend is using this final stage to discuss any doubts you have, ask pertinent questions etc. Many years ago, I was a bit wary of 'putting off' potential employers but now I'm a lot more up front. I'll explicitly state things like "If you are looking for XYZ, then I'm maybe not the right person, I position myself more as ABC". This might ultimately lead to fewer job offers but it also should reduce the chance of taking the wrong job with misaligned expectations.

Basically you want to come out of the final stage with a clear view on whether you want the job or not.

This is exactly my scenario and what you say is spot on.

However I guess if they make me an offer, I am ok to reject at this point too? Obviously signing a contract and rejecting not good but offer stage is fine?

 

[aspiring]

You're not their first choice, their first choice has let them down or they haven't found the candidate they really want. Stuff them.

They reached out to me and said they were still considering my package requirements and for me to be patient. Then they went super quiet and I noticed external adverts for the job, I then chased for an update and they got back to me and said we can take you to final stage. All a bit strange?

 

[HangTime]

What skyripper is suggesting is quite plausible. They might have had a preferred candidate that fell through or some other reason why they thought they could get someone more suited, but they also considered you suitable. I've had a similar scenario myself where there was radio silence for a while after final interview and I basically just called the recruiter out on it, reading between the lines I knew I must be their backup option because they had neither offered nor rejected me. Alternatively it really could be a simple as they didn't have the budget for your demands but they've subsequently got approval for a better package.

This is exactly my scenario and what you say is spot on.

However I guess if they make me an offer, I am ok to reject at this point too? Obviously signing a contract and rejecting not good but offer stage is fine?

Heh, of course. Think about it, if you had to accept then what happens if just offer you minimum wage?
The reality is you'll probably be asked prior to a formal offer if you are still keen on the role, especially if it is via a recruitment agency. Just make sure you have a proper answer here, don't just say yes for the sake of it if you don't think it's the right thing following the final stage. Given you have already let them know your package demands, it will look a bit silly if you say you are keen on the job, they offer you the package you asked for, and then you reject it. Even then, 'looking silly' isn't the worst thing in the world, you could make a case that your demands have changed compared to three months ago as a result of market conditions / personal circumstance etc, although it might alienate a third party recruiter if there is one involved.

 

[jon86]

They reached out to me and said they were still considering my package requirements and for me to be patient. Then they went super quiet and I noticed external adverts for the job, I then chased for an update and they got back to me and said we can take you to final stage. All a bit strange?

It's clear to me that they wanted someone cheaper, but are now willing to consider you and your compensation expectations, because they can't find a better candidate that's cheaper. If you want the job, go for the interview. If you don't, say so and allow everyone, including yourself, to move on.

 

[aspiring]

What skyripper is suggesting is quite plausible. They might have had a preferred candidate that fell through or some other reason why they thought they could get someone more suited, but they also considered you suitable. I've had a similar scenario myself where there was radio silence for a while after final interview and I basically just called the recruiter out on it, reading between the lines I knew I must be their backup option because they had neither offered nor rejected me. Alternatively it really could be a simple as they didn't have the budget for your demands but they've subsequently got approval for a better package.

Heh, of course. Think about it, if you had to accept then what happens if just offer you minimum wage?
The reality is you'll probably be asked prior to a formal offer if you are still keen on the role, especially if it is via a recruitment agency. Just make sure you have a proper answer here, don't just say yes for the sake of it if you don't think it's the right thing following the final stage. Given you have already let them know your package demands, it will look a bit silly if you say you are keen on the job, they offer you the package you asked for, and then you reject it. Even then, 'looking silly' isn't the worst thing in the world, you could make a case that your demands have changed compared to three months ago as a result of market conditions / personal circumstance etc, although it might alienate a third party recruiter if there is one involved.

Yeah there is no recruiter involved thankfully as they always get upset if you decline.

I do want to go to final stage and ask few more questions consider I have only had initial chats 3 months back, I think this is fair to understand the job better?

 

[aspiring]

It's clear to me that they wanted someone cheaper, but are now willing to consider you and your compensation expectations, because they can't find a better candidate that's cheaper. If you want the job, go for the interview. If you don't, say so and allow everyone, including yourself, to move on.

This seems 1000% correct as they rang me and said we have realised we cannot find your experience levels at the salary we were offering. Just the comms on it was not very good though.

 

[dowie]

When I checked in they said they could offer what I was asking.
[...]
If I go to last stage interview but decline should they offer, will it look bad? I feel I will only know if role is right once I have this final assessment.

Why not have that final assessment then and find out if you want the role?

Also, there is nothing stopping you from asking for more if they do make you an offer, if you're unsure or feel silly turning them down then ask for significantly more and see what they say, you can always just let them turn you down... or perhaps if they say yes that additional amount you hadn't thought they'd pay may make the role attractive to you again.

This seems 1000% correct as they rang me and said we have realised we cannot find your experience levels at the salary we were offering. Just the comms on it was not very good though.

Doesn't sound too promising for future pay rises/progression. Unless the role directly impacts revenue and you can point at clear-cut things you manage to achieve over say the next year. Maybe something worth asking about indirectly, if they've been up front with you re: budget then it seems like a valid thing to raise, what is the scope for progression in that role, where can you be in 5 years' time etc.. it can all be from a positive angle re: the company and your future within it, just making sure that there is scope for you to have a career there.

 

[aspiring]

Why not have that final assessment then and find out if you want the role?

Also, there is nothing stopping you from asking for more if they do make you an offer, if you're unsure or feel silly turning them down then ask for significantly more and see what they say, you can always just let them turn you down... or perhaps if they say yes that additional amount you hadn't thought they'd pay may make the role attractive to you again.



Doesn't sound too promising for future pay rises/progression. Unless the role directly impacts revenue and you can point at clear-cut things you manage to achieve over say the next year. Maybe something worth asking about indirectly, if they've been up front with you re: budget then it seems like a valid thing to raise, what is the scope for progression in that role, where can you be in 5 years' time etc.. it can all be from a positive angle re: the company and your future within it, just making sure that there is scope for you to have a career there.

That is very good advice, much appreciated.

In the initial rounds I spoke to hiring manager and HR separately. I did ask hiring manager about future progression and he hinted it was fluid. This particular role I am in process for is a totally new role.

When I spoke to HR about package, that is where it all slowed down. There was a point where they said we are considering your package, please be patient. Then they went silent till I chased.

 

[booyaka]

Don't over think it - If it's not for you - politely decline and move on.

I was once offered a very good opportunity to build a business from the ground up with great support and huge supply of clients/leads etc - On the surface, fabulous but just one part of it I couldn't sell my soul for (long story won't post it all here) - after a lot of soul searching I declined. However, I sent a personal letter to the Managing Director of the business who "head hunted" me and a nice bottle of whisky as I knew he really wanted me to take it on. 8 years later, I'm on excellent terms with him still personally and professionally......

Don't burn your bridges, but be firm, and don't regret it

 

[OpenToSuggestions]

You're not their first choice, their first choice has let them down or they haven't found the candidate they really want. Stuff them.

This sadly.
Happened to me back in 2014 (I never got the offer but they kept me on hold for a month). I posted about it here and people said at the time that they're working on choice #1.

You are concerned that the company will bad mouth you, so they already control you through fear when you don't even work there. Don't work for them based on that alone.