Declining offer

aspiring · 1 Jul 2023 at 16:37

booyaka said:
Don't over think it - If it's not for you - politely decline and move on.

I was once offered a very good opportunity to build a business from the ground up with great support and huge supply of clients/leads etc - On the surface, fabulous but just one part of it I couldn't sell my soul for (long story won't post it all here) - after a lot of soul searching I declined. However, I sent a personal letter to the Managing Director of the business who "head hunted" me and a nice bottle of whisky as I knew he really wanted me to take it on. 8 years later, I'm on excellent terms with him still personally and professionally......

Don't burn your bridges, but be firm, and don't regret it

They did say to me we have realised we cannot get the level of experience required at salaries quoted when I chased them up for a response. Feel like they were trying to get someone cheaper till then.

Yes I will be polite if I do decline. It is a pain when a recruiter is involved.

malachi · 1 Jul 2023 at 17:41

aspiring said:
They did say to me we have realised we cannot get the level of experience required at salaries quoted when I chased them up for a response. Feel like they were trying to get someone cheaper till then.

Yes I will be polite if I do decline. It is a pain when a recruiter is involved.

Dont make their problem, your problem.

aspiring · 1 Jul 2023 at 18:33

malachi said:
Dont make their problem, your problem.

the steps the recruiter takes to convince one to take the role is terrible!

dowie · 1 Jul 2023 at 19:20

aspiring said:
They did say to me we have realised we cannot get the level of experience required at salaries quoted when I chased them up for a response. Feel like they were trying to get someone cheaper till then.

Yes I will be polite if I do decline. It is a pain when a recruiter is involved.

Can be easy if you give them an objective target... and they can't get you that amount in an offer then... "show me the money", anything esle they say to you is pure BS, they either have the offer you want or you've got very good reason to just say "that's fine but I need X, if you want to close this deal then come back to me if they're going to pay X otherwise I'm not interested".

Honestly, if they're pestering you or the recruiter trying to pressure you is liable to cloud your thinking then don't think of them as human beings... think of them as like scummy estate agents who will try and screw you, you've gotta be a little bit adversarial with them.

aspiring · 2 Jul 2023 at 08:45

dowie said:
Can be easy if you give them an objective target... and they can't get you that amount in an offer then... "show me the money", anything esle they say to you is pure BS, they either have the offer you want or you've got very good reason to just say "that's fine but I need X, if you want to close this deal then come back to me if they're going to pay X otherwise I'm not interested".

Honestly, if they're pestering you or the recruiter trying to pressure you is liable to cloud your thinking then don't think of them as human beings... think of them as like scummy estate agents who will try and screw you, you've gotta be a little bit adversarial with them.

What is always annoying is the way they try and sell you the dream even after rejection.

I recall having to say no to one recruiter repeatedly!

dowie · 2 Jul 2023 at 12:15

aspiring said:
What is always annoying is the way they try and sell you the dream even after rejection.

I recall having to say no to one recruiter repeatedly!

If they're calling repeatedly after you've turned down the offer... then just ignore the call and reply with a text "hey, can't talk right now, did they increase the offer?".

aspiring · 12 Jul 2023 at 10:45

Had the interview last week. Didn't hear anything till yesterday when company drop me a line saying hope you enjoyed interview, how do you think interview went?

Found out one of my friends who also attended interview got an offer at same time they sent me email.

Why don't they just say I did not get role???

peterwalkley · 12 Jul 2023 at 11:03

aspiring said:
Had the interview last week. Didn't hear anything till yesterday when company drop me a line saying hope you enjoyed interview, how do you think interview went?

Found out one of my friends who also attended interview got an offer at same time they sent me email.

Why don't they just say I did not get role???

That smells like a veiled question of "Are you still interested in the role in case the other guy turns us down".

If you want the job, then a simple reply of "I enjoyed meeting you and learning about the business. What is the next step and when would it be ?"
If you don't want it, then "Thank you for the opportunity to learn more about your organisation but I intend to pursue other roles."

There's no point writing an essay either way.

aspiring · 12 Jul 2023 at 11:27

peterwalkley said:
That smells like a veiled question of "Are you still interested in the role in case the other guy turns us down".

If you want the job, then a simple reply of "I enjoyed meeting you and learning about the business. What is the next step and when would it be ?"
If you don't want it, then "Thank you for the opportunity to learn more about your organisation but I intend to pursue other roles."

There's no point writing an essay either way.

yeah I think your right.

Weird thing is they want to arrange a call me with me today to discuss post them sending me than email. I actually can't catch up till next week.

Shall I keep quiet and email at end of week?

dowie · 12 Jul 2023 at 11:32

aspiring said:
yeah I think your right.

Weird thing is they want to arrange a call me with me today to discuss post them sending me than email. I actually can't catch up till next week.

Shall I keep quiet and email at end of week?

Eh? Why not just take the call today?

peterwalkley · 12 Jul 2023 at 11:42

I'd ask what the call is about and how long they need ... "so you can have any necessary preparation ready". Whatever they say (unless its to give feedback on why you didn't get the role) ensure you treat it as another interview step.

Scheduling is your decision. If they come back and its something quick, then take it today if at all possible as dowie said, otherwise defer until a better time for you.

FishThrower · 12 Jul 2023 at 15:47

aspiring said:
yeah I think your right.

Weird thing is they want to arrange a call me with me today to discuss post them sending me than email. I actually can't catch up till next week.

Shall I keep quiet and email at end of week?

are you sure that your "friend" isn't lying to you? in some weird way of getting you to pull out of the application? never under estimate people. I have had a friend try this on me once, and I have heard it happening to someone else as well.

aspiring · 12 Jul 2023 at 17:41

peterwalkley said:
I'd ask what the call is about and how long they need ... "so you can have any necessary preparation ready". Whatever they say (unless its to give feedback on why you didn't get the role) ensure you treat it as another interview step.

Scheduling is your decision. If they come back and its something quick, then take it today if at all possible as dowie said, otherwise defer until a better time for you.

I can't do today as I am away with my current employer at a team build.

The email simply said we will discussing further towards end of week (whatever that means) and in meantime would be good to hear your views on how you thought interview went.

I can only see this as buying time incase my friend rejects. If I had offer or they were super keen they would ring me surely?

peterwalkley · 12 Jul 2023 at 18:15

I'd be polite and email to say you could not take the call today due to work obligations and then ask the question I said earlier: what's it about and how long do they need. From your description their request for a phone call supersedes the "hear your views email" as it came later. Reply to the mail asking for the phone call, not the "we want your views" email.

If you can't talk to them until next week (even out of normal office hours), then say so too. You're not at their beck and call until they're paying you for it.

aspiring · 12 Jul 2023 at 18:17

peterwalkley said:
I'd be polite and email to say you could not take the call today due to work obligations and then ask the question I said earlier: what's it about and how long do they need. From your description their request for a phone call supersedes the "hear your views email" as it came later. Reply to the mail asking for the phone call, not the "we want your views" email.

If you can't talk to them until next week (even out of normal office hours), then say so too. You're not at their beck and call until they're paying you for it.

Thanks the email actually said would be good to hear how you thought it went (via phone) so it was always a phone call they want. They also mentioned in email they are discussing at end of week but obv want to speak on phone before hand.

At same time friend got offer.

jon86 · 12 Jul 2023 at 18:54

That sounds to me like they want to keep you on as a backup in case their first choice person backs out (due to an insufficient offer or otherwise), and they're just trying to delay until they get the yay or nay from your friend.

aspiring · 12 Jul 2023 at 19:07

jon86 said:
That sounds to me like they want to keep you on as a backup in case their first choice person backs out (due to an insufficient offer or otherwise), and they're just trying to delay until they get the yay or nay from your friend.

Yeah I feel exactly same way. I am thinking of replying back at end of week as I am away with work anyway? I am not in a hurry to be kept as 2nd choice

tom_e · 12 Jul 2023 at 19:12

There seems to be a lot of dragging it out going on, just say thanks for your time but I'm no longer interested in the position.

CREATIVE!11 · 13 Jul 2023 at 23:25

What about the possibility of them considering opening up another position?

Obviously it's a long shot but that may also be a possibility where some extra work has arisen and they're toying with taking you on as well.

dowie · 14 Jul 2023 at 02:08

aspiring said:
Thanks the email actually said would be good to hear how you thought it went (via phone) so it was always a phone call they want. They also mentioned in email they are discussing at end of week but obv want to speak on phone before hand.

At same time friend got offer.

Hmm, it's a bit odd and slightly iffy to waste your time soliciting feedback from you if they've already decided to reject you.

Did you know for sure that the previous interview was the last stage? Or is there a possibility of another stage? (even if your friend got an offer they may still have a role for example).

I'd be inclined to let them know you're away and unable to schedule a call until next week and then directly ask them if this phonecall is to discuss an offer (if you know there is no other stage)?

Like why should they play some guessing game with you, no we're not going to extend an offer but would you mind giving some feedback on the process would be more honest if that is the case.