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So, I have spent years, making sure that everything on my computer is perfect, just how I like it, everything runs smoothly, very rarely do I find problems, it is, like a pair of old slippers..

My girlfriends computer on the other hand is a different story, she bought it from a shop, she lets her mother use it (big mistake if you ask me, but you didn't ask for soon-to-be mother-in-law jokes), and almost every other week she calls me up "something is wrong with this computer!", the last time, she took it to her local 'pc repair' shop, who managed to mangle her hard drive before returning it. It took a whopping three days before it was clogged up again with various viruses and other nasties, again she took it to the local shop, who this time, tried to nuke it from orbit.

I've almost given up on her computer, I know it needs a fitting end, or maybe just someone who knows what they are doing, unfortunatly for me, I can't just fly down there every week to fix it. But maybe with webroot, I'd not need to.

Hmm, that didn't come out quite as funny as I thought it was in my head.

I suppose that the funniest story I'd have, would be a time when I was working for a well disliked call centre, providing tech support to a high street retailer, on the day that a rather infamous virus struck affecting a great many computers running XP/2000 etc, our lines all flashed red as thousands of customers called for support, just at the time when our own systems all took a nosedive, and there we were, no computers, no way of verifying information, and people running around like the proverbial blue-reared flies, trying to get information around and get things fixed.
 
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Back whe I was younger my dad decided to put a keylogger on my pc, however he told me he was doing it and the reasons. One day I booted it up to be greeted by avast saying it had found a virus and do a boot scan, I promptly clicked yes and let it do its business in hope that he didnt find out I'd got a virus.

Low and behold ten minutes later he comes up stairs shouting and screaming as it had removed the keylogger and foobar'd his windows install at the same time
 
Attention forum members. The following information is from credible intelligence sources on the latest viruses to hit the World wide web :

THE ARNOLD SCHWARZENEGGER VIRUS - Terminates some files, leaves, but will be back
THE MICHAEL JACKSON VIRUS - Attacks only minor files
THE PROZAC VIRUS - Totally screws up your RAM, but your processor doesn't care
THE MIKE TYSON VIRUS - Quits after two bytes
:D
 
.. was working at Heathrow Airport as a Sys Admin. Responsible(?) for mission critical systems like runway lighting and baggage. During a very boring night shift on the eve of April fools day, I thought it might be funny to spike a few baggage system workstations with the infamous BSOD screensaver, being as it was only me on how much damage could it do? I loaded it onto 3 workstations with a time-out of 2 hours - enough time for the morning shift to come in at 5am. I installed it to two nodes out in T4 baggage area then another in the Blue Room/Mission where I normally lived. I then set about my normal tasks changing tapes for the backups and waiting for the phone to ring. It didn't ring. Thinking all was well I went to the canteen to enjoy a cooked breakfast and was just about to get another coffee when a colleague of mine came running up and said, "It's all gone **** up - we've got a major virii attack on the network, 3 nodes are down, why didn't you answer your phone?" I'd picked up the nights standby phone by mistake - all the companies phones are the same.

When I got back to Mission, there was a gaggle of suits from BA, Siemens, and HAL all asking lots of questions, and also present was the Airport Duty Manager, and my bosses boss. They had called in another admin who had restored images to all 7 nodes but the servers were all ok because they were HP K class, running Unix. Because the network is private and not open to the outside world, a lot of questions were being asked about how a virus could get onto the network in the first place. Considering all machines had the floppy, CD and USB ports locked down it was pretty obvious that the only way something could get on would be through an admin.. but the suits didn't know that and I had to choose my words very carefully.

I got away with the 'picked up wrong phone', and managed to come out a hero as I stayed on to repair (cough - remove screensavers) from the quarantined machines, and got paid overtime to do so.

So.. if anyone is reading this and was working on that fatefull morning shift in 1999, I'm very sorry. It was supposed to be a harmless prank :eek:
 
rush_syndrome said:
.. was working at Heathrow Airport as a Sys Admin. Responsible(?) for mission critical systems like runway lighting and baggage. During a very boring night shift on the eve of April fools day, I thought it might be funny to spike a few baggage system workstations with the infamous BSOD screensaver, being as it was only me on how much damage could it do? I loaded it onto 3 workstations with a time-out of 2 hours - enough time for the morning shift to come in at 5am. I installed it to two nodes out in T4 baggage area then another in the Blue Room/Mission where I normally lived. I then set about my normal tasks changing tapes for the backups and waiting for the phone to ring. It didn't ring. Thinking all was well I went to the canteen to enjoy a cooked breakfast and was just about to get another coffee when a colleague of mine came running up and said, "It's all gone **** up - we've got a major virii attack on the network, 3 nodes are down, why didn't you answer your phone?" I'd picked up the nights standby phone by mistake - all the companies phones are the same.

When I got back to Mission, there was a gaggle of suits from BA, Siemens, and HAL all asking lots of questions, and also present was the Airport Duty Manager, and my bosses boss. They had called in another admin who had restored images to all 7 nodes but the servers were all ok because they were HP K class, running Unix. Because the network is private and not open to the outside world, a lot of questions were being asked about how a virus could get onto the network in the first place. Considering all machines had the floppy, CD and USB ports locked down it was pretty obvious that the only way something could get on would be through an admin.. but the suits didn't know that and I had to choose my words very carefully.

I got away with the 'picked up wrong phone', and managed to come out a hero as I stayed on to repair (cough - remove screensavers) from the quarantined machines, and got paid overtime to do so.

So.. if anyone is reading this and was working on that fatefull morning shift in 1999, I'm very sorry. It was supposed to be a harmless prank :eek:
Click to expand...

Epic, Chaos.

I like it.

11 keys left
 
A virus walks into a bar, the bartender says "we dont serve virus's in this bar" The virus replaces the bartender and says "Now we do."
 
Similar to others but funny none the least,

i sent one off my very computer illiterate mates a CD drive opener virus that would repeatedly open and close his disk tray, and he started to get really angry and snapped the disk tray when it opened it self,

i was laughing so hard, he spent 30 quid to replace it and an extra 50 quid for pc ***** to get rid of the virus .
 
Similar to many other stories but funny none the less.
In school I had a foreign teacher (Italian) and our objective for the lesson was to do a PowerPoint about small animals, one of these animals was a mice. So me and my classmates downloaded a permanent sticky keys hack which made all sorts of odd noises and started pressing shift now and then, the teacher thought there were mice in the classroom! :D
 
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In early 2004, I wanted to download Office 2003 which I needed for school at the time.

So I was naughty and went on Kazaa light K++ and pressed download.

My mate at the time told me KAzaa light was amaizing as there was NO viruses on it.

After 25 minutes I was very surprised as my download finished, at the time I was still on 56k .

So after clicking on the EXE file and installing it. It prompted me to Restart XP.

Ok so clicked yes, restated the PC and suddenly the Windows XP load screen appeared but noticed that after the usual Windows XP it said “Gay edition”.

So Windows booted and my desktop background changed to about 10 men naked doing “a train”.

So thought erm ok change the Background. Right clicked on the mouse went to change background and windows tells prompted me “Error! You are to gay to access this”. After trying to access start menus, my computer and after a lot of “Error! You are to gay to access this” messages. My mum comes into my room. Sees the my desktop background of the 10 men doing odd things, looks at me in disbelieve. So for 30 minute I tried to explain that It was a Virus and not me being “gay”.

Got Grounded for a week at the age of 14, my dad took the my PC to PC world and I wasn’t allowed to use the Family PC again.

The only plus side of this story was that I saved up money and bought my first ever PC
 
Many years ago, back in the windows 98 times at my school, we managed to catch one of the very simple adwares that just change your desktop and web address, super easy to remove, just boot in safe mode without network, delete reg entries and the thing from the system and change desktop and homepage back.

Anyways, as soon as our IT teacher seen it, she started screaming to switch off all the PCs because it's a VIRUS and panicked all around the place to start up norton scanning ( which will take hours to do full scan on the slow machines ).

I told her to move away, removed on of them within 2minutes, I started laughing and called her a noob.... nearly got expelled for this.

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The other day, my friend called me to check his PC because it was running incredibly slow and internet was slower than my mobile connection on his old DELL. My first guess was overheating or too much stuff running on the OS but after few checks everything seemed alright.

I've noticed that he's downloading a lot of P2P stuff but he didn't have any AV software.

I've installed Avast and after full scan which took nearly whole day it found over 5000 diff adware/malware and trojans and nearly all his HDD was infected.

Pointed at the count with grin on my face and asked him how the heck did he manage to do that ...

Full format was necessary, it was too late haha.
 
Had a mother fall for one of these webpages that imitates 'my computer being scanned with thousands of viruses. Best part was these pages all look like XP but the laptop was running vista.

Another story doesnt quite fit the bill, but i saw someone else mention crazy CD drives which reminded me. I had downloaded a rick roll 'virus' (a bat file and a few VBS scripts), and tweaked it to make it more annoying. So last day of 6th form rolls up, and i discover an IT lab full of first years with no one watching over them (so naturally they were all playing the flash games that had somehow eluded the school filters). Quite handily all the computers have some pretty heavy snoopware which is controlled from the front machine (so the teacher can take control of a PC or turn all the monitors off etc). I simply walked upto it, and i could plug the mem stick in, and tell it to run the bat file to all the computers, and walk out again. 25 little kids stuck with fullscreen rick astley, lyrics popping constantly up, a cmd message repeatedly writing 'rick rollz haz taken over your computer' (or something like that. I would like to point out that that part was already there. I try not to use that kinda language :p), spazzing CD drives, and no explorer.exe (i tried disabling ctrl alt del, but this seems near impossible. But the firsties didnt have a clue how to get rid of it nonetheless :/ )

completely unrelated, but im on a roll (pun unintended). i also acquired a key to the padlock on the window that leads to the roof, so i ran a pirate flag up the school flagpole that day, and changed the padlock on my way back down :)
edit: rephrased as i was in a rush earlier xd
 
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I need webroot for my girlfriend for love nor money will she never understand no to download random crap. We have a joint bank account and we was going to set up another saving account i did it online without her knowing and took all the money and put it in there without telling her.

Next day she said all the moneys been stolen i was confused at start then i understood i played along for a while saying its her undue care online. She was so upset so i told her the truth.....wish i didnt do it now had my privileges taken from me.. eh i need this so this doesn't happen again.
 
just wondering if the winners have been emailed yet since i havent checked my mail for a few days and dont tend to get chance/ dunno what the message may loook like im assuming something along the lines of wedroot key winner or something like that
 
I got a ripper infection from one of the PCs at Uni. Took some work home on floppy and it trashed the partition table on my PC taking my dissertation with it. The backup was 2 weeks old...

Ooops.
 
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