Go on, have your say - why me?

_PD_ · 21 May 2008 at 10:15

I don't have a problem with you, at all.

But going on about how you saw "Led Zep 4 times and other amazing classic rock bands" is completely irrelevant, isn't it?

You saw a band. Is that impressive? Do you put it on your CV? Was it a hard achievement, that took a lot of training? No. I've seen plenty in my life but I don't go on about it on here....

I don't understand what your point is.

Other than that, sorry to hear you've been getting harsh e-mails - name and shame.

icey_haj · 21 May 2008 at 10:16

Gilly said:
This forum is one of the very best when it comes to little flaming, few insults and whathaveyer. Almost every forum I've ever visited (including tech forums) have much more bitchiness than here.

I've never felt intimidated on this forum :/

Lol, hows your hands?

Anewbe4u · 21 May 2008 at 10:17

Get out old man.

Umm, I do find it strange sometimes that people would take the time out to email you to have a go, that's pathetic.

singist · 21 May 2008 at 10:18

Cue: "how many young forumites could you take on" thread.

Don't let 'em get to you mate; we more senior/experienced people should be supported and revered, not attacked

I think that it's the way some people use forums and how many of them think that we/they/anyone shouldn't care about what others think of them on the intarweb; that is partly a self defense mechanism but mainly the anonymity thing.

We all project a persona via our posts, sometimes it is near to the truth, other times it is the 45 year old lorry driver pretending to be a 15 year old girl syndrome (see, we know R124/LA420

)

Seriously, if anyone takes it upon themself to email a member personally, they should at least have the balls to identify themself and secondly, put forward some form of logical argument rather than abuse.

This forum is respected by most here and I believe that in general terms, there is quite a good atmosphere but as with real life, you still meet immature ****s who just want to ruin your day.

Chin up, you got a job

nil carborundum illegitimi

Gilly · 21 May 2008 at 10:20

icey_haj said:
Lol, hows your hands?

Cleaner than yours.... always

Mat · 21 May 2008 at 10:20

Gilly said:
I've never felt intimidated on this forum :/

Lets face it Gilly, people blow smoke up your behind on here all the time and put you on a very high pedestal. You may not see it that way or agree but I see it regularly.

I can understand why new members might feel intimidated but its no different to being the new one in any group. Once you learn the subtle ways of the group you begin to fit in and can step in time with everyone else which, unfortunately, includes the development of bad habits and rather unsavoury behaviour in some cases.

icey_haj · 21 May 2008 at 10:21

Mat said:
Lets face it Gilly, people blow smoke up your behind on here all the time and put you on a very high pedestal. You may not see it that way or agree but I see it regularly.

I can understand why new members might feel intimidated but its no different to being the new one in any group. Once you learn the subtle ways of the group you begin to fit in and can step in time with everyone else which, unfortunately, includes the development of bad habits and rather unsavoury behaviour in some cases.

This man speaketh the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth

Shicky · 21 May 2008 at 10:21

Gilly said:
I've never felt intimidated on this forum :/

Must resist.....risk getting hit by BANHAMMER...ahhhh!

Ethics · 21 May 2008 at 10:23

So what you want a big group hug and some re-assurance that the entire OCuk community loves you?

Christ

Gilly · 21 May 2008 at 10:23

Mat said:
Lets face it Gilly, people blow smoke up your behind on here all the time and put you on a very high pedestal. You may not see it that way or agree but I see it regularly.

Whilst that may be true (though as you surmise I don't often see it, and when I do I don't like it) it certainly wasn't true for the years before I was a member of the mod team...

Mat said:
I can understand why new members might feel intimidated but its no different to being the new one in any group. Once you learn the subtle ways of the group you begin to fit in and can step in time with everyone else which, unfortunately, includes the development of bad habits and rather unsavoury behaviour in some cases.

I don't think this is a particularly difficult place to slide into. Newbies I've encountered have all got up to speed pretty quickly.

Majago · 21 May 2008 at 10:24

Kreeeee said:
I really appreciate your posts mate and you've never come across as a know it all to me.

My thoughts exactly. Tbh I've only ever since Dmpoole's posts as attempting to be helpful and certainly not 'show-offy'. He just gives an opinion as everyone else does.

Pea0n said:
Because your up your own arse in most of your threads, posts and even if you are correct then your just plain rude and arrogant about it. here again your throwing "im a doctor dont you know" at us, need i say more?

That post was obviously (or maybe not) tongue in cheek. I'm pretty sure he's not even a doctor - noly works for the NHS - and was just taking the mick.

Adam said:
Please don't let this be the start of "What do you think of my posts" like a few years ago.

Seconded. I remember that phase

Wiggins · 21 May 2008 at 10:25

Gilly said:
I don't think this is a particularly difficult place to slide into. Newbies I've encountered have all got up to speed pretty quickly.

Well, apart from a few selected ones :rolleyes:

walks off quietly whistling

Anewbe4u · 21 May 2008 at 10:26

Lets all agree to disagree, a forum wide ban on people over 30 should sort this out.

Hedge · 21 May 2008 at 10:27

Ive been on this forum for years now although i dont think im actually a notable member, I agree with some of the points being made.

The trouble with this forum is there is a definate "clique" or hierarchy in place. Some kiss ass, some dont. I have a couple of rl friends on here and they all agree on that.

I think the restrictions in swearing / personal attacks on the forum, mean that people cant express themselves in a manner which they normally would.

Due to too many smart assed people on here, i find that making posts to be more of a chore than on other forums, as I feel that i need to get my grammar/punctuation and point across perfectly.

Anewbe4u · 21 May 2008 at 10:31

Hedge said:
I've been on this forum for years now although I don't think i'm actually a notable member, I agree with some of the points being made.

The trouble with this forum is there is a definite "clique" or hierarchy in place. Some kiss ass, some don't. I have a couple of rl friends on here and they all agree on that.

I think the restrictions in swearing / personal attacks on the forum, mean that people cant express themselves in a manner which they normally would.

Due to too many smart assed people on here, i find that making posts to be more of a chore than on other forums, as I feel that I need to get my grammar/punctuation and point across perfectly.

hehe

Gilly · 21 May 2008 at 10:33

Wiggins said:
Well, apart from a few selected ones

walks off quietly whistling

That's more a personal thing than a forum issue

Hedge said:
I think the restrictions in swearing / personal attacks on the forum, mean that people cant express themselves in a manner which they normally would.

And yet we've complaints that the place is intimidating. Can you not see that relaxing the swearing/personal attacks rules would exacerbate this?

Anewbe4u · 21 May 2008 at 10:35

Gilly said:
That's more a personal thing than a forum issue

And yet we've complaints that the place is intimidating. Can you not see that relaxing the swearing/personal attacks rules would exacerbate this?

I think the rules are fine here. If I want to go swear on the internet I'll go to other forums which allow it.

semi-pro waster · 21 May 2008 at 10:39

Wiggins said:
Well, apart from a few selected ones

walks off quietly whistling

Is that the fault of the forum or the people who are joining? Or is it simply a combination of the two?

I don't think this forum is particularly intimidating as you are unlikely to get huge flame wars or many personal insults before they are stopped. It is the same as meeting any new group of people for the first time, if you take a little bit of time to gauge the atmosphere first then you are likely to fit in better - sure, you can have your say without paying any attention to the culture of the rest of the group but you then need to be prepared that for a greater portion of the time you probably simply won't fit in, other times you'll be loved instantly but that is what happens with any group of people.

As for the original post, dmpoole if you can ignore it then I wouldn't worry about it too much. I have noticed you mention that you've been to see "XX" Band however many number of times but I figure you are just pleased to have been there rather than claiming some sort of superiority because of it. It is your experience so if you want to talk about it then that is up to you, I'm equally free to pay attention or ignore as I see fit.

Mat · 21 May 2008 at 10:42

Hedge said:
Ive been on this forum for years now although i dont think im actually a notable member, I agree with some of the points being made.

Yep, me too...

Hedge said:
The trouble with this forum is there is a definate "clique" or hierarchy in place. Some kiss ass, some dont. I have a couple of rl friends on here and they all agree on that.

I completely agree with that as well but I think some of it is down to many people knowing each other in real life. If you have experiences outside of the forum that you can share you automatically have a connection that will exclude those whom you have not met. There are many meets around the country which I guess anyone is invited to...

Hedge said:
I think the restrictions in swearing / personal attacks on the forum, mean that people cant express themselves in a manner which they normally would.

I disagree with that bit and I quite like the rules imposed on those two examples you state. There is nothing on here that is serious enough to warrant a personal attack greater than a passing rolleye as far as I'm concerned. If someone is unable to express themselves without swearing then they shouldn't say anything.

Hedge said:
Due to too many smart assed people on here, i find that making posts to be more of a chore than on other forums, as I feel that i need to get my grammar/punctuation and point across perfectly.

Yep, again I agree, but in part. I regularly start posts but give up when I realise that what I'm about to post will no doubt result in nothing more than petty squabling.

Roberta · 21 May 2008 at 10:42

Because some people have nothing better to do!

We (dmpoole and I) certainly have differences of opinions (veganism for one!) but that's all part and parcel of being different people. I have seen a definite change in your posts in the last few years and you seem a lot more tolerant than you once were. You appear to have mellowed but you also seem to have more drive in a career sense. I've grown pretty fond of your posts actually! I always wait for your input on the music ones as you know your stuff.