Answering your first question, if the players arms are down by their side then it shouldn't be a penalty although you'll be given far less leeway in circumstances like that. The second part of your post makes absolutely no sense though. Whether something is a handball or any other type of foul is completely subjective, whether somebody is in an offside position is not. You're either in an offside position or an onside position, there's no opinion, no grey area. That's why 1mm offside is offside and 1mm onside is onside.