thanks for the heart felt response dampdog
other than cycling i was lifting dumb bells before as well, i would come in from cycling and do some lifting before my shower and while my legs were recovering i would use the weights.
i have screwed up tonight and drank a bit but much less than usual, i accidentally came across 2 cider bottles which were left over from my birthday and from seeing them there i struggled all evening and now i feel guilty as i drank them and now im crying for doing so
You're welcome bud.
To be blunt you really need to get your drinking sorted out before it kills you. If you've you've got the mindset that I've found a couple of bottles, I have to drink them, you're in trouble. I'm sure you'll dismiss it as being a one off because you're down, depressed, hacked off, whatever but you need some professional support and guidance to sort yourself out. If you've not already crossed the level of becoming alcoholic, you are certainly dependent on having your usual "drink!" If you continue to damage your heart muscle through drinking your life will reach a whole new level of miserable.
As your heart fails you will start to become breathless and your exercise tolerance will diminish, it might be barley noticeable to begin with but it will become worse. As it worsens you no longer shift the excess fluids round your body, your lungs become congested and become susceptible to more frequent and severe chest infections. (congestive heart failure) If it becomes bad you won't be able to lie flat at night because your lungs will fill with fluid. It's not constrained to you lungs, your whole body will retain fluid (edema) you legs will start to swell, if it's bad so will your abdomen.
You're at the point where you have another chance now, grab it while you still can. While you may not be able to stop the symptoms, you may well be able to diminish them to a huge extent so they don't even bother you and push them far off into the future.
I remember being hacked off and depressed at having to take medication every day it's a big thing to get your head round. Over the years I've been there done that and changed my view to being thankful these medications keep me well. Did you say you now take 7 meds a day. LOL, I take more than that at breakfast.
I suggest you ask if you can be referred to cardiac rehab. They will talk you through most aspects of getting you head round living with a heart condition. Meds, diet, depression, exercise you name it. Following my heart attack I was warned off heavy weights and playing squash for life. They both place too much instantaneous load on the heart. What I would say is that was the advice given to me, I'm sure any advice you are given will be tailored to you. You need to start taking care of yourself bud, go steady to begin with exercise wise but make it part of your life. Try something new, I started hill walking, thought I'd hate it, loved it.
Goes without saying I wish you well.
DD