Honour the dead in a wedding speech?

Andr3w

Andr3w

Andr3w

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Morning all,

For a Father of the Bride speech is it good taste/practise to mention recently (~6 months) passed away family members? A Grandfather on one side of the family and a Grandmother on the other side.

Both sides of the family have lost people this year and others who have fought cancer this year and will be attending the wedding.

Is it worth mentioning this in the speech or glossing over it? How would you word it as to not upset anybody?
 
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I would probably recognise them and their absence by saying something along the lines of "... and we also remember those family members who are no longer with us who would have undoubtedly enjoyed this wonderful occasion."
 
I would not mention it at all, or if you must, very briefly.

Wedding speech should be about laughter and joy, steering the conversation too much to those who have passed is in bad taste imo.

Something very subtle could be fine such as "Thank you to everyone here today, and who those who unfortunately could not be with us today" etc.. But I wouldn't talk too long about it.
 
Mat said:
I would probably recognise them and their absence by saying something along the lines of "... and we also remember those family members who are no longer with us who would have undoubtedly enjoyed this wonderful occasion."
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tasteful and brief, very nice. I don't think anyone would be offended/ upset by that :)
 
Being a wedding photographer, I've heard people say things along the lines of

"and I know ***** and **** will be looking down today and would be so proud and it's a great shame they couldn't be with us today".
 
I've heard specific references, at weddings, to individuals who have died and their connections to the bride/groom. It wasn't out of place or tasteless in any way whatsoever and everyone I could see in the audience were nodding or otherwise agreeing with the sentiment.
 
We included a message and toast to that effect ("to those who have left us and cannot be here today, with us in spirit" or similar), in my groom's speech. Check that the bride and groom are happy with what you're going to say (and don't make it the last thing you say before you sit down) but I think it's fine, and a nice thing to do.
 
You can do it, but keep it very positive and direct it to the married couple.

Something like:
"Those who are no longer with us in body, but always here in our hearts. I know wherever they are, they are proud of you both"
 
Heard it many times, and it's always worth while IMO to mention those that cannot be with you (for whatever reason). I think it is perfectly acceptable to do. As has been said, brevity is key.
 
Make sure the best man does his speech first.

"Lets remember the dead"

followed by

"Remember when you were caught with that iranian hooker dressed up like a gimp with a feather duster in your rear end"

and

"Which bridesmaid is coming back to my room then?"

Won't go down fantastically well
 
I wouldn't bring up the cancer ordeal but it would be a bit thoughtless not to mention the deceased.

If you're going to have someone reading out messages from the people who couldn't make it to the wedding because of illness or distance (perhaps this is only an Irish tradition), the end of this is a good moment for someone else to briefly say something about how everyone is missing those who are no longer with us, etc. I'd keep it out of your main speech.
 
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