After he died his wife became very Lizstless.
how fight's start.......
- Thread starter Schizo
- Start date
After he died his wife became very Lizstless.
Deleted member 651465
Deleted member 651465
Mendelssohn.
Man of Honour
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I will tell you a real story how fights start.
Some years back we attended a domestic incident where there was a real verbal ding dong going on.
As usual, both parties were seperated and after some good listening and a sympathetic ear they calmed down. The bloke of the house was in the living room and all was calm until the sarge ambles in and looks at a family portrait on the wall and then looks at the bloke, nods towards the picture and says to the bloke quite nonchalantly ........
' Happier times eh ? ' ..................
Then the fight started.
Some years back we attended a domestic incident where there was a real verbal ding dong going on.
As usual, both parties were seperated and after some good listening and a sympathetic ear they calmed down. The bloke of the house was in the living room and all was calm until the sarge ambles in and looks at a family portrait on the wall and then looks at the bloke, nods towards the picture and says to the bloke quite nonchalantly ........
' Happier times eh ? ' ..................
Then the fight started.
Last edited:
It is important for men to remember that, as women grow older, it becomes harder for them to maintain the same quality of housekeeping as when they were younger. When you notice this, try to show some understanding. My name is Al , and let me relate how I handled the situation with my wife, Peggy.
When I retired a few years ago, it became necessary for Peggy to get a full time job along with her part-time job, both for extra income and for the health benefits that we needed.
Shortly after she started working, I noticed she was beginning to show her age. I usually get home from the golf course about the same time she gets home from work. Although she knows how hungry I am, she almost always says she has to rest for half an hour or so before she starts dinner. I don't yell at her.. Instead, I tell her to take her time and just wake me when she gets dinner on the table. I generally have lunch in the Men's Grill at the country club, so eating out again at night is not reasonable. I'm ready for some home-cooking when I hit that door.
She used to do the dishes as soon as we finished eating, but now it's not unusual for them to sit on the table for several hours after dinner. I do what I can by diplomatically reminding her several times each evening that the dishes won't clean themselves. I know she really appreciates this, as it does seem to motivate her to get them done before she goes to bed.
Another symptom of aging is complaining. For example, she will say that it is difficult for her to find time to pay the monthly bills during her lunch hour. But, boys, we take 'em for better or worse, so I just smile and offer encouragement. I tell her to stretch it out over two or even three days. That way she won't have to rush so much. I also remind her that missing lunch completely now and then wouldn't hurt her any (if you know what I mean). I like to think that this is one of my strong points.
When doing simple jobs, she seems to think she needs more rest periods. She had to take a break when she was only half finished mowing the yard. I try not to make a scene. I'm a fair man. I tell her to fix herself a nice, big, cold glass of freshly squeezed lemonade and just sit for a while. And, as long as she is making one for herself, she may as well make one for me, too --- or just bring me a cold beer in a frosted mug.
I know that I probably look like a saint in the way I support Peggy, and I'm not saying that showing this much consideration is easy. Nobody knows better than I do how frustrating women get as they get older, but, guys, even if you just use a little more tact and less criticism of your aging wife because of this letter, I will consider that writing it was well worthwhile. After all, we are put on this earth to help each other.
Signed,
Al
Foot Note:
Al died tragically on March 1st of a perforated rectum. The police report says he was found with a Calloway Big Bertha II Driver jammed up his rear end, with barely 5 inches of grip showing and with a sledge hammer lying nearby.
His wife Peggy was arrested and charged with murder. The all-woman jury took only 15 minutes to find her Not Guilty, accepting her defense that Al somehow, without looking, accidentally sat down on his golf club.
When I retired a few years ago, it became necessary for Peggy to get a full time job along with her part-time job, both for extra income and for the health benefits that we needed.
Shortly after she started working, I noticed she was beginning to show her age. I usually get home from the golf course about the same time she gets home from work. Although she knows how hungry I am, she almost always says she has to rest for half an hour or so before she starts dinner. I don't yell at her.. Instead, I tell her to take her time and just wake me when she gets dinner on the table. I generally have lunch in the Men's Grill at the country club, so eating out again at night is not reasonable. I'm ready for some home-cooking when I hit that door.
She used to do the dishes as soon as we finished eating, but now it's not unusual for them to sit on the table for several hours after dinner. I do what I can by diplomatically reminding her several times each evening that the dishes won't clean themselves. I know she really appreciates this, as it does seem to motivate her to get them done before she goes to bed.
Another symptom of aging is complaining. For example, she will say that it is difficult for her to find time to pay the monthly bills during her lunch hour. But, boys, we take 'em for better or worse, so I just smile and offer encouragement. I tell her to stretch it out over two or even three days. That way she won't have to rush so much. I also remind her that missing lunch completely now and then wouldn't hurt her any (if you know what I mean). I like to think that this is one of my strong points.
When doing simple jobs, she seems to think she needs more rest periods. She had to take a break when she was only half finished mowing the yard. I try not to make a scene. I'm a fair man. I tell her to fix herself a nice, big, cold glass of freshly squeezed lemonade and just sit for a while. And, as long as she is making one for herself, she may as well make one for me, too --- or just bring me a cold beer in a frosted mug.
I know that I probably look like a saint in the way I support Peggy, and I'm not saying that showing this much consideration is easy. Nobody knows better than I do how frustrating women get as they get older, but, guys, even if you just use a little more tact and less criticism of your aging wife because of this letter, I will consider that writing it was well worthwhile. After all, we are put on this earth to help each other.
Signed,
Al
Foot Note:
Al died tragically on March 1st of a perforated rectum. The police report says he was found with a Calloway Big Bertha II Driver jammed up his rear end, with barely 5 inches of grip showing and with a sledge hammer lying nearby.
His wife Peggy was arrested and charged with murder. The all-woman jury took only 15 minutes to find her Not Guilty, accepting her defense that Al somehow, without looking, accidentally sat down on his golf club.
Associate
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My girlfriend and I had been fighting recently, so I to go to the shop to get her some chocolate and just get out of her way for a little while. When I got back she was lying naked on the living room floor, across her right breast was some corn, pumpkin seeds and some wheat, on the left breast was a small goat, sheep pig and cow.
I knew she was upset but I didn't realise she had started self farming.
I knew she was upset but I didn't realise she had started self farming.
Soldato
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I'm sure the OP's joke has been posted on here before...
Still funny though
Still funny though
Soldato
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When I was little, we used to play a game called "knock and run" where you knock on someone's door and run away before they answered.
Nowadays, it's known as "Parcelforce"
-----
Toyota have apologised for not spotting the fault which causes loss of control.
They would have noticed it sooner if the Yaris had actually been bought by men.
-----
My mate asked if I wanted to join his religious sect where they worship a probiotic drink.
I said, "I'm not interested in Yakult."
Nowadays, it's known as "Parcelforce"
-----
Toyota have apologised for not spotting the fault which causes loss of control.
They would have noticed it sooner if the Yaris had actually been bought by men.
-----
My mate asked if I wanted to join his religious sect where they worship a probiotic drink.
I said, "I'm not interested in Yakult."
Heres one for you off 5mins ago;
The lass has just got out of hospital after some blood tests.
"Can you come round, we can have dinner blah blah"
"Remember im seeing the parents and eating there tonight."
"So you will leave me to fend for myself?"
"Well its hardly like you have to go take down a deer on the run with your bare hands. Just put something in the in the microwave..."
And then the fight started...
The lass has just got out of hospital after some blood tests.
"Can you come round, we can have dinner blah blah"
"Remember im seeing the parents and eating there tonight."
"So you will leave me to fend for myself?"
"Well its hardly like you have to go take down a deer on the run with your bare hands. Just put something in the in the microwave..."
And then the fight started...
Soldato
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- 9 Nov 2003
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- The Motor City
Lies. Everyone knows that Al will always work in the shoe store and Peggy will never, ever get a job. Quit making stuff up.
Last night my beloved OH said that he was a bit bored with our marital arrangements and wondered whether I fancied a change in positions. I gladly agreed so tonight he's doing the ironing and I'm sitting on the sofa watching the tele.