How to overcome a fear of heights - Help/advice

I have always been scared of heights and it's never got better or worse. A few things did scare me ******** though - abseiling for example. I often challenge myself, when I do climb something high, to look down and to feel/accept the vertigo. In shopping centres, for example. I also get claustrophobic, so scouts wasn't fun when we were sent from an abseiling wall to potholing...
 
I used to love roller coasters and rides that go upside down then I realised I'm uber tall and mostly a poor fit in the seats.

on multiple occasions it felt like I would fall out if I didn't hold on to the bar with my hands really right. like I could just slide straight out between the bar and the sear cos the bar obviously doesnt come down all the way when my huge legs/ knees get in the way
 
I used to be very scared of heights, as I got stuck on a chair lift in Bulgaria that was very high.

Over years I've just had to put myself in positions that were very uncomfortable, im still not great with them mind but can stomach it.
 
You won't overcome it as it's perfectly rational to be fearful, it's if the fear wasn't there that I'd be worried as then you get complacent. If, however, as you suggest it stops you doing things you want to do the best thing IMO would be learning how to manage it better, CBT would teach you techniques on how to do that.

What with the current pressures on the NHS I'm not sure how much urgency they'd put on a fear of heights, or even if your doctor would recommend you for treatment, still it's worth asking as you never know. Either that or maybe going private or, and i say this without having checked, something online may be able to teach you the basics.
 
it's a curious fear.

i'm happy to go up a rock climbing wall, yet prop up a ladder to the same height and i'm not so comfortable.....

i think for me it's mostly how secure the structure i'm on is, although that doesn't explain how i'm entirely fine with flying (including aerobatics and zero g which just makes me giggle uncontrollably).


funny old thing the human brain, i'm totally cool with any and all forms of video game spiders, pictures and videos of spiders, even spiders in a tank at the zoo, yet the moment a house spider scurries out it's a sickening chill to the bone and a wave of fear-based adrenaline....
 
Try getting a oculus and playing the plank game. Might help, might make it worse but if it gets too much just take off the headset.
 
I can happily jump in a plane or indeed jump out of one and have done, however I can't stand being on tall buildings/bridges or ladders etc.
 
kaiowas said:
Picking through your examples there’s a pattern there that in the instances where you are OK, you are in full control and can get down whenever you want. In the cases where you’ve reacted badly you’re being taken to heights by someone/thing else without the ability to directly control it yourself. Would that be a fair assessment and maybe something to work on?
Click to expand...

I'd imagine this, I hate heights too, totally irrationally i know.

But even if I'm on a balcony and my mum is behind me, i get nervous.

However i have done a bungee jump, because I was supposed to fall off.

I drive cars on track and have almost definitely taken more risk than all the flights in my life, yet flying makes me sweat.

It's the control thing for me.
 
I can do heights if I feel secure. I have no problem with tall buildings, ski lifts/cable cars, flying etc but absolutely cannot do ladders or free climbing. Even a small step ladder trying to put up some Xmas light I had no chance. Once I'm above being able to hold on I freeze. It took all my effort to paint above my stairs. I toyed with buying some tall ladders so I could clear my gutters, but it would have been a waste of money. I wish I could conquer it. I had a chap round doing some roof work and he was up and down his wobbly ladder without a care in the world. I have no idea how it doesn't bother some people. Even worse are videos of people free climbing daft structure and hanging off. I would just pass out. I once walked helvellyn with the Mrs. It took me over ages to get across a particularly exposed bit. I tried to find a way around but made the mistake of turning round and looking down. I couldn't move for 10 to 15 minutes until I was reasonably sure I wasn't going to pass out and could slowly make my way back. She had disappeared and had to come back for me.
 
I appreciate all the replies, they've been helpful.

Watching video's doesn't work. I can watch Dibnah ones all day without issue but show me some daft idiot freeclimbing a building and I'm out. Perhaps, as a few have mentioned, its the perceived control of the situation (or more specifically the exit plan?)

@bainbridge thats not an unreasonable point to be fair!
 
Psycho Sonny said:
Nope.

How do glass elevators make people terrified when they are solid. Or even just a elevator with one glass panel on one side.

Hotel room on the 30th floor cannot go near the solid windows which cannot be opened, etc.

Vertigo - makes you feel dizzy and the feeling of being thrown off and down.

It's a mental thing therefore different for everyone.
Click to expand...

Vertigo is instinctive even a baby who can't talk or understand speech will not crawl over a glass floor if you can see through no matter how much the mother encourages it from the other side and thats been tested. Its a built in response to stop you from unintentionally killing yourself.

The only thing thats seems to be different are steeplejacks who appear to have no sense of fear whatsoever watching a Fred Dibnah film once climbing up a 300 foot ladder with an overhang to reach the lip and sitting on a simple wooden swing with nothing between him and eternity and not a care in the world.
 
By the sounds of it you don't have an especially debilitating fear. Everything you've mentioned in the section concerning your triggers are some fairly extreme and unusual stimulus.
I'd personally just live with it so long as flying and tall buildings don't significantly affect you.

Given how specific your fear is, it's seemingly not just being high up that is the issue, seemingly movement and direct line of sight is also required. I'd at least say in my unprofessional opinion that you should be able to avoid or work around your fear without confronting it.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top Bottom