How to talk to girls

One of my young mates is very successful with young ladies and I asked him for tips last night.
He uses one tactic -
Since women are totally and utterley obsessed with mobile phones he stands next to one he fancies and acts like a complete noob with his phone until the female offers help.
 
dmpoole said:
One of my young mates is very successful with young ladies and I asked him for tips last night.
He uses one tactic -
Since women are totally and utterley obsessed with mobile phones he stands next to one he fancies and acts like a complete noob with his phone until the female offers help.

Actually, it's a fact that girls like nothing more than the phallus. Why doesn't he just whip it out and start playing with it in a really perculiar manner, then she will feel inclined to advise correct practice.
 
Alchemy said:
Actually, it's a fact that girls like nothing more than the phallus. Why doesn't he just whip it out and start playing with it in a really perculiar manner, then she will feel inclined to advise correct practice.

Hahaha.
 
Don't talk to girls whilst fixated on one outcome - either getting their number, pulling them, worrying if they fancy you or whatever... enjoy their company, have fun, chat, have a dance. And then if it's going well move in for the kiss.
 
You need to talk to a girl Angus Higgins style.

"Hi there, would you like a drink (I've got one [it's beer])? I prefer to use box brackets (the square ones) for second-level parenthesis rather than author contribution (I actually used box brackets when I mentioned my drink [I said it was beer {but you probably didn't realise it was in box brackets <I'm actually speaking in my fourth level of parenthesis now>}]). "

:p

Just kidding, Angus ;)

edit;

haha, it's like speech that needs formatting to figure out

Code:
Hi there, would you like a drink
(
    I've got one
    [
        it's beer
    ]
)
?

I prefer to use box brackets
(
    the square ones
)
for second-level parenthesis rather than author contribution
(
    I actually used box brackets when I mentioned my drink
    [
        I said it was beer
        {
            but you probably didn't realise it was in box brackets
            <
                I'm actually speaking in my fourth level of parenthesis now
            >
        }
    ]
)

the more indented it is, the less relevant it is...

Right, that's the last straw, I need to go and do something with my Saturday.
 
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Awww, poor angus. :( I find some of his comments funny, but he's not intentionally being pedantic...
What's chivalry? My vocab is lacking once it gets to words longer than 7 letters. :o
Anyone? I heard it mentioned today in a timbaland song, and it's really annoying me know! All the stuff I've found online is about knights and horses! :confused:
Have we got any girls on here that could help some of us shy people out? :p
They've probably run for the hills by now, after some of the suggestions! :eek:
 
Anyone? I heard it mentioned today in a timbaland song, and it's really annoying me know! All the stuff I've found online is about knights and horses! :confused:

Seriously? Chivalry is opening car doors for women, giving up your seat on a bus, that sort of stuff.
 
Seriously? Chivalry is opening car doors for women, giving up your seat on a bus, that sort of stuff.
Yep, I'm serious. :o Being "gentlemanly" then - thanks (it's been bugging me all day). It's all the stuff about horses and knights that got me all confused.

Soz for going off topic, now back on topic, this is works for me, everytime:
999dp6.jpg

:D
 
I find just being happy and having a good time generally works.

In clubs I find dancing like a loon quite successful. I can't dance at all but I don't care and I love doing it. You get all sorts of weird lasses this way.
 
I'm a little socially inept, and have a big problem with talking to girls. What exactly should I talk about when I meet one, say, in a club or bar? I'm thinking if I start talking about my latest build, it may kill my chances. Should I try to be funny, or just act casual? What has worked for you?

Walk in and scream "SPAAARRRRTAAAAAA!"
 
I'm a little socially inept, and have a big problem with talking to girls. What exactly should I talk about when I meet one, say, in a club or bar? I'm thinking if I start talking about my latest build, it may kill my chances. Should I try to be funny, or just act casual? What has worked for you?

I used to be shy, but one day I woke up and decided I'd had enough. I have to be honest, it's laughing at people like you that gives me all the confidence. I just thought of people who are socially awkward and by laughing at them (mentally) it gave me the desire and drive to not be like them. Just laugh at the version of you that finds it difficult and think how pathetic it is. It sounds incredibly harsh, but it worked for me. Girls are just like your usual mates but slightly less banter, a strange perspective on life and once in a while they come up with absolute gems. Like the other night "yeah well at least my stomach isn't bigger than me eyes" and "wow, you're off to Leeds. that's far up, isn't that in Scotland?"

To be honest you shouldn't need advice or pointers. If you're confident it all happens naturally, and once you feel that you're in tune with her it becomes extremely easy.
 
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