Marriage?

I got married when I was 23 and my wife was 22. Still together after 8 years of marriage (been with her for 13 years). Getting married at a young age is no bad thing, but you absolutely have to be sure it's the right thing to do (obviously).
 
Freefaller said:
I've been fortunate that I have been able to live a full life and able to itch those itches, and have very little responsibility and go where the wind took me. However as such I've matured, developed and become the person that I am now (who I happen to like). And am in a situation where marriage appealed to me greatly and happened to found my "pea of the same pod" with whom I want to spend the rest of my life with.

However, I'm in my 30s, I've lived life and had plenty of time to mature and develop to who I am now. At 22, you may well be mature enough, but if so, you don't need to rush into it, enjoy life, and see what happens, if in 5-6 years time things are still as they are, then do it, but don't jump into things unless you are sure - it's not fair on either of you.

It's a big step, it is exciting, and it's something that has to be 100% your choice, not just owing to peer pressure or because it's what is done.
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thedoc46 said:
I met my missus around the same age as you.

Dated her for 5yrs, before moving in with her. Lived with her for 5yrs before marrying her.

Now happily married since 2004 with two young boys, living a decent life in the States.

Just make sure its the right one, otherwise it'll completely mess things around in your life.
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Diagro said:
I'm glad to see so.many members getting married after being with the person for over 5 years.

imo you shouldn't marry someone unless you absolutely know you can spend your life with them
And two years is NOT long enough to make this decision.
I have been with my jen for 9 1/2 years and getting married on the 29th of this month.

The reason for many divorces is purely due to people rushing into it
oh and i'm 24...
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Listen to these people, they speak wisely.

I meet my wife 13 years ago, we moved in together after 5 years, got married after being together 7 years and had our first child after being together 9 years. I was 34 when I got married :)
 
nathanael91 said:
I lost my virginity last year with her because I wanted to find someone who was pretty cool and funny to be with.
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This is a brilliant reason to get married, dont wait go get married now seriously.










































this may or may or not be serious;)
 
CREATIVE!11 said:
Why ever get married is the question this day and age, so the woman gains all the rights and you get no real benefit? then when you divorce she can talk half your earnings after shes cheated on you. Then blames you for "never being around" as if that is a suitable excuse. I've seen it all too many times amonst friends and friends of friends.

Fact is i've no idea why dudes still get married, it's age old tradition perpetuated by the media and disney films and girls just want to do it because they saw it on TV as they do with anything else "I want my day in the spotlight I want my photos of my big day!"

It's moronic and people shell out their savings on this crapp too?

my guess is too many dudes are whipped to say no or too dumb to see how it's an unfair deal. I'd rather spend money doing actual worthwhile experiences and improve myself as a person rather than tick a box to say YEAH LOOK I'M.....MARRIED!1!

Don't get me wrong in the old days different generation culutral values etc marriage was probably ok but the way girls behave this day and age and have access to so much stimulation and methods to go wandering it's no wonder they say facebook became killer of marriages.
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Agreed - you don't need "marriage" in order to gain all the "benefits" of marriage, e.g. love, commitment, a stable home/family for children etc. etc.

Marriage doesn't change anything in a relationship, the only thing which changes are a few legal aspects, which in my opinion is more a reflection on the fact that the laws around it need to change.
 
Haggisman said:
Agreed - you don't need "marriage" in order to gain all the "benefits" of marriage, e.g. love, commitment, a stable home/family for children etc. etc.

Marriage doesn't change anything in a relationship, the only thing which changes are a few legal aspects, which in my opinion is more a reflection on the fact that the laws around it need to change.
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Exactly this.
 
You don't need to marry as Haggisman has said, there are some benefits to it legally and soon financially thanks (or not) to the tories.

I see it as more of a commitment, I mean there's no way I'm going to get divorced now and have wasted the money I spent on the wedding lol
 
Halfmad said:
You don't need to marry as Haggisman has said, there are some benefits to it legally and soon financially thanks (or not) to the tories.

I see it as more of a commitment, I mean there's no way I'm going to get divorced now and have wasted the money I spent on the wedding lol
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Well - you could look at that 2 ways.

  • It's already wasted, since there was no need to have a wedding in the first place.
  • It wouldn't be a waste even if you divorced, since it was a good party
 
I got married at 22 and it is our ten year anniversary in February.

Only you know if it is right or not, some will say its too young and people like myself will tell you its perfectly fine. It is down to the individual.
 
Haggisman said:
Agreed - you don't need "marriage" in order to gain all the "benefits" of marriage, e.g. love, commitment, a stable home/family for children etc. etc.

Marriage doesn't change anything in a relationship, the only thing which changes are a few legal aspects, which in my opinion is more a reflection on the fact that the laws around it need to change.
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That pretty much sums up my feelings on it.
 
Personally I don't see the point in marriage, certainly ahead of other life choices. From a bonding/commitment point of view, I'm incredibly happy in my relationship, getting married wouldn't strengthen it. And from the money side, I have been to some pretty dam good weddings, but the amount they cost is akin to a house deposit, and I'd rather have the house.

For me the commitments I want to make are buying a house and raising a family. Marriage is a legal nicety that I would sort out after doing what I consider to be more important.

Wanting to spend the rest of your life with someone doesn't mean you have to marry them.
 
Don't see the appeal personally - I respect that for many it's something they are into & it holds a special meaning to them, but it's very much a personal point of view thing really.
 
Marriage is great unless you don't want to do it. :)

Let's be realistic, it's all a matter of opinion.

If one of you wants to get married and the other doesn't, it might be awkward. That said, if neither of you had ever heard of compromise then your relationship is probably already difficult(or easy depending on your point of view).

We have access to various different cultures and points of view on subjects like this but at the end of the day it's a personal decision, completely dependant on the situation.

I, for one, will end up marrying the woman that I am with. Because we want to do it. :) and it's as simple as that.

Does that mean that it'd work for someone else? of course it doesn't. Does that mean it'll definitely work for me? Also no. All we know is what we try and what we experience. Try it, if it doesn't work out then so be it.
 
I never complain when I get invited to one though, I'm never going to turn down a free meal and some drinks :D
 
OK I haven't read everything on here but right now a mate of mine who was married for 15 years and has two kids is going through a divorce.
Out of the blue 3 weeks ago his wife said she'd had enough - although it looks as though she may have been seeing someone else.

She is seeking 75% of the value of the house, a ridiculous sum of money each month and possibly a stake in his company.

I've been with my other half for 12 years. We have a joint mortgage and a lovely daughter. We've had dogs and fish and ups and downs which life throws at us. But marriage? Total mugs game.

You never know how people will feel in the future. Minds change.
 
What Haggisman said.

I think 22 is crazy but if it works then good for you/her.

You don't sound very "worldly" for a 22 year old in the Army, if im honest.
 
Domo said:
OK I haven't read everything on here but right now a mate of mine who was married for 15 years and has two kids is going through a divorce.
Out of the blue 3 weeks ago his wife said she'd had enough - although it looks as though she may have been seeing someone else.

She is seeking 75% of the value of the house, a ridiculous sum of money each month and possibly a stake in his company.

I've been with my other half for 12 years. We have a joint mortgage and a lovely daughter. We've had dogs and fish and ups and downs which life throws at us. But marriage? Total mugs game.

You never know how people will feel in the future. Minds change.
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This is exactly it, and who gets all the sympathy? the woman that's right the poor blameless woman who has been riding sacks like a bouncy castle.... then takes your money.

I know not every girl is like this etc etc, but personally it's a game of risk isn't it really. Marriage gives you nothng else but a nice party and a title and i'm not willing to risk my stuff for that eg if i had these things like my business my house etc

75% ?LOLLZZZZZZZZZZZ also out of the blue means yeah shes probably been seeing someone and waiting for it to be a sure deal. I heard a friend once say woman can be a bit like how monkeys climb from tree to tree (im sure guys can be like this too) they won't let go of the previous branch till they've got a firm hold on the new one then bang... divorce.
 
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