My wife told me I'm fat...

the final solution for me was to skip breakfast, have a few hundred calories for lunch, a few hundred for dinner and went on an exercise bike for about 30 - 40 minutes really going for it until sweat was dripping from my fingers, 6 days a week. I had to eat fruit a lot as well because i was starving all the time.

i went from size 35 jeans to size 30
 
Begbie said:
Imagine not being able to tell your wife/husband to sort themselves out. I'd 100% rather they told me than living a life ignorant to it.

OP - have you thought about lifting? 3 sessions a week will see you look better, and can probably lose less weight whilst feeling better and living longer.
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Whenever I do weights, I ALWAYS overdo it and everything hurts for about 2 weeks.

My wife losing weight was a bit of a catalyst to sort myself out. Hoping we can sync and do some activities together.
 
bloodiedathame said:
Whenever I do weights, I ALWAYS overdo it and everything hurts for about 2 weeks.

My wife losing weight was a bit of a catalyst to sort myself out. Hoping we can sync and do some activities together.
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Just don't overdo it?

Get a reasonable starting plan like strong lifts, or starting strength.
 
bloodiedathame said:
Whenever I do weights, I ALWAYS overdo it and everything hurts for about 2 weeks.

My wife losing weight was a bit of a catalyst to sort myself out. Hoping we can sync and do some activities together.
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This is actually just something that is part of doing weights, its called Delayed Onset Muscle Soreness...DOMS. This phase will pass once your body starts to become used to this sort of activity.

On the whole i think you have an admirable goal, but you've set your limits quite hard to start with.

You should consider jumping in to the big fat weight loss thread, there is a lot of good info in there.

Generally though a daily walk is good, a step goal is very handy as its a hard target that you can break down across the day, although using the dog having a sprained wrist is not a valid reason to not walk!

Also as others have said your calorie goal is very low, you really should be consuming a higher amount i would honestly say your size and stature justifies a 2k calorie goal, add to this a 10k steps target and then try adding in some workouts.

Weight training is so underrated for weight loss. It encourages the body to maintain muscle mass, and tie this in with a high protein diet which does the same and when you lose weight, you will lose more fat then muscle this way, rather than an a more equal amount of each. Your goal is to lose fat, so you want to focus more on keeping muscle.

Good luck with your journey.
 
Syla5 said:
This is actually just something that is part of doing weights, its called Delayed Onset Muscle Soreness...DOMS. This phase will pass once your body starts to become used to this sort of activity.

On the whole i think you have an admirable goal, but you've set your limits quite hard to start with.

You should consider jumping in to the big fat weight loss thread, there is a lot of good info in there.

Generally though a daily walk is good, a step goal is very handy as its a hard target that you can break down across the day, although using the dog having a sprained wrist is not a valid reason to not walk!

Also as others have said your calorie goal is very low, you really should be consuming a higher amount i would honestly say your size and stature justifies a 2k calorie goal, add to this a 10k steps target and then try adding in some workouts.

Weight training is so underrated for weight loss. It encourages the body to maintain muscle mass, and tie this in with a high protein diet which does the same and when you lose weight, you will lose more fat then muscle this way, rather than an a more equal amount of each. Your goal is to lose fat, so you want to focus more on keeping muscle.

Good luck with your journey.
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Yeah it's the DOMS that makes me struggle to get into a routine with weights.

Thankfully I have very active kids so usually get to take them out for a walk/cycle even if the dog isn't going.

I'm not actually finding the calorie goal too tricky so far. I can basically eat whatever I want for dinner so long as I've skipped breakfast (normal for me) and had a shake for lunch.

I think if I were walking more or weight training then I'd definitely put the goal higher otherwise I just wouldn't have the energy or recover.

Hardest thing so far is switching to black coffee. :cry:
 
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Do the resistance training bro. Even if it's just a bodyweight routine, it'll be a larger part of your overall aesthetic/leanness gains over time. You'll have doms yes, but they shouldn't last longer than a handful of days unless you have genuinely overdone it, if you're aching from an activity beyond 3 days you probably are really overdoing it. This is especially true of bodyweight exercises, as proper isolation is less of a thing, which TBF is sort of the point really; you're after hormonal response to maintain mass rather than getting a sick bicep pump.

If you're an "all or nothing" kinda guy then it can be difficult, but if you can get inside your own head and divert this energy/attitude to focusing on brutal, ruthless, consistency (of low intensity at first) then you'll be laughing. Even cut the steps down a couple of thousand and use those 30 minutes to bash out bodyweight exercises.

Resistance training+additional 300kcals (majority protein) per day > maintaining full step routine.
 
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bloodiedathame said:
Yeah it's the DOMS that makes me struggle to get into a routine with weights.

Thankfully I have very active kids so usually get to take them out for a walk/cycle even if the dog isn't going.

I'm not actually finding the calorie goal too tricky so far. I can basically eat whatever I want for dinner so long as I've skipped breakfast (normal for me) and had a shake for lunch.

I think if I were walking more or weight training then I'd definitely put the goal higher otherwise I just wouldn't have the energy or recover.

Hardest thing so far is switching to black coffee. :cry:
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It isnt about finding the caloire goal hard right now, its about having no room to make adjustments later down the road when weight loss plateaus.

Out of curiosity how did you get to your current calorie target? Did you work out your BMR etc or did you just choose 1.5k because it sounded reasonable?

A pretty no nonsense video worth watching from James Smith.

www.youtube.com

Why & How A Calorie Deficit STOPS WORKING - A No BS Guide to Adaptive Thermogenesis

Use this link for my calculator: https://www.jamessmithacademy.com/macro-calculator/?utm_source=youtube&utm_medium=social&utm_campaign=calorie_calculator
www.youtube.com www.youtube.com
 
I actually don't remember but you're right the deficit probably is too low looking at bmr calculations.

BMR comes out at about 1900.
Sedentary target looks like it should be 2140/2300... That's a lot more than I'm currently eating.
 
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^ o lawd I forgot to mention the kcals calcs. Yes this seems far more reasonable. I would look to be eating BMR (remove processed food, lower but don't come even close to eliminating carbs, emphasise fat protein and greens) and affect a calorie defect with exercise (primarily resistance training). Resistance training is hard to justify on paper sometimes because it's less easy to lay it out in terms of energy usage than it is with cardio, however I'd be prioritising this and 7500 steps daily just to make sure you're keeping out of a chair/off the sofa. Like I said even a relatively low intensity bodyweight routine will sort you right out, have a Google. On non workout days you can fully moon the steps (it will help with DOMS even if it hurts, active recovery is real) although looking at your life/knowing my life at least, you're unlikely to push past 12500 consistently without some routine walking for a purpose such as in your job/walking to work, and that's absolutely fine tbh.
 
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bloodiedathame said:
I actually don't remember but you're right the deficit probably is too low looking at bmr calculations.

BMR comes out at about 1900.
Sedentary target looks like it should be 2140/2300... That's a lot more than I'm currently eating.
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Yeap thats what i thought might be the case. Now if you consider that you are likely more then sendentary as well give your increased activity levels through walking etc, your maintennace is likely somewhere between 2300-2600. If you want to keep it simple then aim for a 500 calorie deficit initially. So say 2100 cals per day.

This gives you room to reduce down your calories if weight loss plateaus, and also gives you room to add in more activity.

As Zefan suggests, change the composition of what you eat as well and that can really help things out.
 
Beer_MonsterUK said:
I'm in a similar position, but turning 50 this month. Joined a 6 week introductory offer at a local gym/trainer place, followed his nutritional programme, doing training/HIIT 3 times a week and lost 13lb in 2 weeks. Even in that time i feel immeasurably better, both phsyically and mentally. I'm waiting for the wheels to fall off, but enjoying the ride.
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I will also be approaching this milestone later in the year.. I really need to get my butt out of my chair. Although the current humidity+mixing contrete and laying slabs has been killing me over the weekend, I need something more regular.
 
Forgot to update:

Friday I was a few calories over.
Impossible to record what I ate and drank over the weekend but it was def a blowout.
Yesterday I felt like crap, didn't walk but didn't eat much either. I was 800 cals under. Oops.
 
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