OcUK Dadsnet thread

Ah we're in the sleep regression phase now - goes down generally ok in the evenings, but she's a bit disruptive after midnight and waking up every hour or so. It's just a phase, it's just a phase...

It is just a phase. The question is how many weeks/months/years it lasts for :p
 
Question for people who have split with partners who’s kids are older 18+

How did you deal with them getting to that age and them being adults and not coming around as regular anymore.

My youngest is turning 18 soon and naturally I know he’s growing up and will be an adult and I don’t want to mandate he comes round once/twice a week as he’s got his own life and whatnot now but don’t want to seem like I’m just dropping him and will obviously tell him he can come round whenever etc but I don’t want him to feel he has to come if he’s busy or doesn’t want to. My eldest is 21 nearly and back from uni now so he just does whatever anyway because he works full time so we see each other whenever and I’d like my youngest to have the same freedom, my main issue comes from his mum will (naturally) want the child maintenance until it’s not due anymore but i don’t want her using it as excuse to say well pay me more.

I’d speak to her but since we split (3 years nearly) she’s not been open to communication and is very offish about, any questions just get one word responses via text.

Ultimately i don’t want to come across to him as treating him like a kid anymore.
I have recently gone through this exact thing.

Back in October once I knew my son (18) was settled at his parentship I contented his mum about stopping the private arrangement we had for child maintenance, that conversation it one of the worst things I have had to do! My eldest (20 in a few days) kicks off because I'm putting pressure on her and her brother.... Basically the mum kicked off and told them they will need to cover the equivalent to the CM agreement. She (daughter) now wants nothing to do with me (lives with mum).

I see my son regularly, when he is not busy with friends/girlfriend. We schedule for every other week and then play it by ear as to when each of us are busy. My youngest two boys (from my now Wife) keep begging to have big bro over to play Fortnite :D

Keep good contact dont ever let that drop off, even if its just a random message or stupid real/pic, talk and most of all do stuff together!
 
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