**OFFICIAL** I cannot access the shop/forums thread

[Energize]

It must have been a terrorist attack!

 

[orderoftheflame]

£5 on it being saucer men.

 

[cheets64]

I thought the forum and shop was not linked and hosted on different servers.

 

[Col_M]

Slower than an old lady's broken hip healing!

 

[Margaret]

Same happened yesterday too.

 

[Bes]

I BEAT THE LOCK_)!!!!!!

 

[Tom|Nbk]

It makes it all a bit weird really, normally when it all goes a bit wrong we get a little update, but to just lock with no comment, hope everything is ok

It's not, so I heard.

 

[Cosimo]

The dildoes from outer space are collecting their debts.

 

[Azza]

Everthing is so slow its painfull.

 

[Jez]

Never known the store to be completely down like this, it seems to have been the case all day. This must be something pretty serious

 

[Tom|Nbk]

It must have been a terrorist attack!

Almost

 

[Happy]

The dildoes from outer space are collecting their debts.

Please do explain

 

[Mr-White]

its been like that for the last few days, at one point this morning the forums and shop were both down

MW

 

[Slackworth]

Just to update you all we've had some problems as I'm sure you're aware and hopefully everything should be fixed now.

Somebody bought the wrong hamster food and they went on strike. We had to hire more hamsters but wanted to make sure that they were genetically modified for maximum performance. Upon inspection several of them failed this test and were rejected.

We then sent Yewen on a trip out to go and find more genetically enhanced hamsters but unfortunately contracted rabies and is foaming in the mouth in hospital somewhere. We are not sure where but I'm sure we'll see him soon.

Our search for the hamsters was then completed when Ace Modder followed in Yewen's tracks. He drove back home to Brummy and found some Brummified hamsters who were happy to take up the job.

They are all spinning away at several hundred miles an hour keeping the server alive.

Thank you for your understanding and patience.

No hamsters, Yewen or Ace Modder were harmed in trying recover the server from imminent death

 

[Jez]

Lol, what actually happened? As someone dealing with enterprise IT, i for one would be interested at what could cause such an outage. That was pretty severe!

 

[Hedge]

And so... we return to normality!

 

[Slackworth]

Lol, what actually happened? As someone dealing with enterprise IT, i for one would be interested at what could cause such an outage. That was pretty severe!

When the hamsters didn't like the food a few stayed behind but they couldn't handle the amount of requests coming to the wheel per second, collapsed and died.

 

[Hedge]

In other words, someone got peeved and had a wee in the server

 

[Bennie-Mac]

That explains everything

 

[Jez]

When the hamsters didn't like the food a few stayed behind but they couldn't handle the amount of requests coming to the wheel per second, collapsed and died.

If i read you correctly, i think i understand