Online dating

I had a lung infection a while back and got involved in chat rooms etc cos I couldn't get out at all :( Ended up meeting someone who I then went on to have a two year relationship with. Moved across the country to live with me. It fizzled out eventually but we are still in touch and good friends. Also met a couple of boy bunny boilers too, but be sensible, be careful and don't take everything that's said to you as gospel.

Made some great friends in that period who 6/7 years on are good friends in rl and I count them as just 'friends' now not online people. Loads of people from here (Piggy and Desmo, Tiggy and 13ALL spring to mind but I am sure there are more) have met online and are happy and in lurrrrrve ;)
 
im probably getting excited over nothing don't expect an e-mail back but it was a nice wee confidence boost when i needed it, first friday night spent sittin about the house since.

im not very good at going out meeting someone i have no idea where to start, i haven't chatted anyone up in so long. I figured this is kind of the easy way away from rejection, at least all the people on these sites are after the same thing. (well except the bunny boilers which will give a good story in the pub with the mates if it turns out that way).
 
oh my god she replied back, she wants to meet up for a drink, now this is startin to scare the hell out of me, im worried i'll just fall for her instantly in some kind of rebound reaction.
 
online dating is great. i would recommend that you dont go there expecting her to look just like her photos, and also expect that she's going to be much more annoying IRL. that way, if she is, you'll be like "ah well, thought so", still nail her, then never call again. if she's great, then you can be like "wow, she's better than i thought", nail her, then call again and live happily ever after.

<insert obligatory "high five" in stupid lettering>
 
Mattius said:
Anyone tried it?
after the bitter demise of my relationship a month ago or so. my sister thought it would be fun to put me on online dating sites, i was up for it so went along.
anyway whilst browsing away i sent a couple of e-mails to a couple of girls who i thought are out my league but thought what the heck.

got a shock when one of the girls e-mailed me back tonight. Im really excited, nervous and scared. She is absoloutly stunning and sounds a right good laugh. i haven't chatted anyone up or dated anyone in 7 odd years. im trying to be as normal as i can but its so wierd.

anyone had any good or bad expiereance with it?
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Sorry to go off track abit but which dating websites do you use? Its for a mate...i know what you thinking but it is!!! ONEST! :rolleyes: :p :D :D

R
 
Sic said:
online dating is great. i would recommend that you dont go there expecting her to look just like her photos, and also expect that she's going to be much more annoying IRL. that way, if she is, you'll be like "ah well, thought so", still nail her, then never call again. if she's great, then you can be like "wow, she's better than i thought", nail her, then call again and live happily ever after.

<insert obligatory "high five" in stupid lettering>
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ROFFLES:D:D
 
^5.

In recent years I reckon online dating has got more and more mainstream. The idea of it being full of mingers, axe murderers and social recluses (or all of the above) is a thing of the past, I actually know a couple girls who do it and they are perfectly 'normal'. While the sceptics will ask "why would an attractive girl be on a dating site, whats wrong with her, otherwise she could find a man the normal way?!?", there are reasons why it appeals to girls:

-Not all girls are into the pub/club scene
-They can get to know a bit about you in a safe environment
-It's easier (they think) to filter out the men who are just after one thing
-It's just a way of broadening their horizons, allowing them to be choosey and only meet the men they really fancy/like the sound of.

For middleaged people in particular it's a gold mine. A chap I used to work with is 45 (looks younger) and he's had loads and loads of attention just through one site, they are literally queueing up to message/meet him. I think once people get a bit older they don't have so many 'normal' ways of meeting people e.g. pubs/clubs so they seek alternate methods.

I actually tried it myself a couple of years ago but got a bit fed up of timewasters... I think there are some women out there who just want a bit of attention and a chat. Ironically once I started looking online I actually met my current gf IRL through a friend, but if that ever comes to an end I'll definitely be hunting online. It seems that loads of girls/women on dating sites want a man over the age of 25, maybe they are fed up with immature lads I don't know.

While it's tempting to just have a poke about on free sites like Faceparty, remember the fact that it's free means that some of the girls are just doing it for a laugh and are not necessarily after a date. On a subscription site, at least you know they are fairly serious about wanting to find somebody.
 
I know lots of people who have done it and have had and are having wonderful and great realtionships. I can see why I guess, because you can get to know the person really well, and then meet up with them and feel less nervous I guess. I think it's important not to spend TOO long writing emails and get the first meeting done sooner rather than leaving it too late. You'll build each other up too much in your mind and you need to get over the writing only stage, and actually meeting up.

I also think that in this modern world/society people are so much more wound up and concentrating on their jobs that people don't have time to socialise or don't have the inclination to. I read somewhere that London has the biggest proportion of single people aged between 20-30, which frankly I found shocking. But I guess for people working from 8-7 every day leaves very little time for a social life. I guess this doesn't apply to everyone, but people seem to be rushing around more and be more busy nowadays so it might be more difficult for people to dedicate time to developping relationships?

There is still a little bit of a taboo or stigma attached to it I think, but it's certainly going away and become more common place. There are some amazingly attractive women (and men...) who are single and looking on these dating sites. I've helped a few people write letters and "pick" people. Furthermore a friend of mine works for one of the dating companies (which I shan't mention as it would be classified as pimping), and did some technical work for him. There's an incredible amount of single people out there. It's quite sad really :( So many people looking for someone and so many people single. I guess some people are happy to be single too?

I wouldn't smirk or make fun of anyone who uses online dating, I think it's great. :) As long as you don't rely on it 100%, if you have no social skills or self confidence (which comes across in emails anyeay), you're not going to succeed after the first date anyway!

I think it enables people to meet people they wouldn't normally meet, and it might even be safer. There's more to meeting people than just bumping into them in a drunken club ;)

I wish you good luck, and to anyone else who does it.

Edit: Hangtime's post is much better than mine... :o
 
yeah thats what i thought the site i use is subscription and anyone who wants to message someone needs to pay money so hopefully they genuine.
 
im like some little kid going on the first date, im so bloody excited, meeting her up on wednesday for as she describes it a "cheeky wee drink".
now all the real nerve bending things start happening, what do i wear? where do we go? what do i say?
 
Smart casual.

Somewhere where you can talk and the music isn't too loud, and is easy to get too. Maybe if you get on, then head off to a restaurant? So maybe time your meeting to be around 6pm or so?

Be yourself, chat about what you've been chatting about on email/phone etc... Take the mickey out of each other for meeting online, and enjoy each other's company... there is no set patter, just be you!
 
Freefaller said:
Smart casual.

Somewhere where you can talk and the music isn't too loud, and is easy to get too. Maybe if you get on, then head off to a restaurant? So maybe time your meeting to be around 6pm or so?

Be yourself, chat about what you've been chatting about on email/phone etc... Take the mickey out of each other for meeting online, and enjoy each other's company... there is no set patter, just be you!
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got it in one there good luck to you mate not done this before my self let us know how it goes.
 
im now crapping my pants as the big day approaches, at least meeting someone in a pub or a club you see them and get to speak to them, this is like a blind date. kinda wierd and bizarre.
she's yet to confirm for definate said she might have something else on (get out clause i think) but said she's definatly up for it.

Supposed to be meeting tomorrow night, and as much as i tell myself this is all just a bit of fun and to relax i've got one serious knot in my stomach.

god i've turned into a wimp.
 
this is the best part...the "is she a man? is she a lunatic?" phase. i love that part.

you wait til she's 45 seconds late and you start deciding when's the latest you'll stay til :p
 
Online dating?

O god, awful experiences. Met a girl on a chatroom years ago, got talking, met up with her on a blind date, didn't even know what she looked like or she me. Spent all my damn money on her the job lot!!!


Been happily married to her for 4 years now! :D
 
Sic said:
this is the best part...the "is she a man? is she a lunatic?" phase. i love that part.

you wait til she's 45 seconds late and you start deciding when's the latest you'll stay til :p
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Ah yes, been there done that. There is also the chance that they'll turn up and you wish they hadn't :/

Mattius, don't worry yourself so much dude. You're a guy, she's a girl, I'm sure you'll find things to talk about. If it helps, try and run through a conversation or two in your head, so that if the conversation drops off for a moment, you can have a question or two waiting to keep it flowing. You may not need it if you get on well, but it never hurts to be ready :)
 
Mattius said:
Anyone tried it?
after the bitter demise of my relationship a month ago or so. my sister thought it would be fun to put me on online dating sites, i was up for it so went along.
anyway whilst browsing away i sent a couple of e-mails to a couple of girls who i thought are out my league but thought what the heck.

got a shock when one of the girls e-mailed me back tonight. Im really excited, nervous and scared. She is absoloutly stunning and sounds a right good laugh. i haven't chatted anyone up or dated anyone in 7 odd years. im trying to be as normal as i can but its so wierd.

anyone had any good or bad expiereance with it?
Click to expand...


met my girlfriend on the timeout site - while i was terribly lucky in the fact she was prettier, more sane and more kick@ss than most girls I've met in bars, i'm not sure whether that's always the case. and don't assume just because they have a flattering picture that they are actually that stunnning! fortunately my emma is! :D
 
What sort of sites do people frequent for this type of thing then as I have heard of quite a few success stories.
 
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