It's funny that this thread was made, I'm currently rewatching every South Park episode.
Dey Tuk er jerbs!!
Eric Cartman: Stan, don't you know the first law of physics? Anything that's fun costs at least eight dollars.
Randy Marsh: Staaan, Staaan!
Liane Cartman: Doctor! Did you find out what's wrong with him?
Dr. Doctor: I'm afraid he's... running out of time.
Liane: Why?? What's wrong with him??
Dr. Doctor: It's his time. It's ...running out.
Liane: Well what does he need?
Dr. Doctor: He needs to have more time.
Liane: What can we do?
Dr. Doctor: Well, I suppose we could try a time transplant. I'll have to call in a specialist. [turns and walks out. Liane returns to Cartman]
Liane: [cradles Cartman somewhat] It's going to be okay, baby. We're going to get you more time.
Liane:Oh my God! Eric! Eric,
[caresses him] Mommy's here. Sweetie?
[notices Dr. Doctor] Oh what's wrong with him?
Dr. Doctor:I'm afraid that your son is... incredibly stupid. He thought he could fly with cardboard wings. The stupidity is so severe that it caused a fall, which has... put him into a deep coma.
Liane:Coma... My God, for- for how long?
Dr. Doctor:There's no telling. He may never recover. We'll just have to wait. And see.
[the camera looks at Cartman, then pans up and fades out]
[Hell's Pass, some time later. The camera pans down back onto Cartman, who is now covered in facial hair and a bandage around his head.] Singers:
Seasons change, time passes by.
As the weeks become the months become the years.
Cartman:Eugh...
[sits up, his eyes still closed.]
Liane:
[stands up and drops her book]
Oh my... Doctor!
[Cartman blinks] He's awake!
[the doctor and nurse return]
Cartman:Wheh? Where am I?
Liane:Oh, you've finally come back! It's a miracle!
Dr. Doctor:You're at the hospital, Eric. You've... been in a coma for some time.
Cartman:Coma... How long?
Dr. Doctor:It's been two days. Nurse, you can remove his face-warmer now. Nurse:Yes, Doctor.
[tugs at the facial hair and it comes off.]
Dr. Doctor:Now, Eric, you've suffered massive head traume. Your road to recovery will be long and arduous. At least another two days.
[a shot of the hospital's exterior, then back to the recovery room, where Liane is giving Cartman a glass of chocolate milk]
Butters: I'm a bad old bear.
Stephen/Chris Stotch: You're a grounded old bear.
