Relationship help...again

Women are like monkeys - they dont let go of one branch until they have a hold on the next one.

Dont be someones 'back up' plan. You should be a first choice.
 
M0T said:
Women suck.

I met a girl last week, spent loads of time with her and tonight she tells me she likes me a lot and asks if I like her. I say yes.

She has a boyfriend.

She can't make up her mind what shes going to do because she is 'confused'.

Now I'm sure she didnt mean to hurt me because shes a really nice person, but why did she have to tell me, what do i say to her now?

Its times like this I wish I were gay.
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why would you want to be with her if she has a bf and has to think who she would prefer, if she liked u that much she would pick you over him... tell her that, make her want you...
 
Lemonkettaz said:
At least she has been honest with you.

What do you do, let her decide, but i know i wouldnt hang around for long, If she is just gonna have the best of both worlds, get out asap
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Couldn't agree more tbh. That would be my advice as well.
 
If you like her, tell her, convince her, that's probably what she's waiting for?

Or have I misinterpreted the problem? :)

It's probably hard for her to leave a nice steady relationship for an uncertain one with her, so you need to convince her you are serious.
 
Once a cheater, always a cheater. Sad but true. If she cheats on her current boyfriend, what is to say she wont cheat on you.

Stay Well Clear
 
^^
too right, coupled with what appears to be a healthy dose of "I don't know what I want but I want it..."
Sounds very cynical but there's too much baggage there for you to risk getting more involved with.
 
Locrian said:
Once a cheater, always a cheater. Sad but true. If she cheats on her current boyfriend, what is to say she wont cheat on you.

Stay Well Clear
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Nonsense.

Nothing is ever as clear cut. Personally I went from being a serial cheat, to a totally 100% faithfull in my last long term relationship, 7 years worth or so. Some of us can change ;)
 
DON'T!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I am still in the same No Swearing! for more than a year. Unfortunately work colleagues mean I have to see her every day. I will leave my job in a week and plan to never see her again. Even though I love her, it was wrong. Maybe I would have never known many things, but I wouldn't have ended up so hurt.

Can you imagine seeing the woman you love going home to another man???

You are in a difficult situation though.

If you ask her to leave and she does, it shows she doesn't have much consideration for the bf, treating him like No Swearing!.

If she doesn't, you will be played the fool, for each little mistake you make, can be the reason why she can't leave him yet...


my advice for your own sanity is :

find another woman.
 
One of my golden rules is don't get involved with girls in relationships....simple as that.

Stop seeing her and tell her she knows where you are if she decides she wants you.

You might think it's harsh but it's in everyones best interests, trust me.
 
MookJong said:
One of my golden rules is don't get involved with girls in relationships....simple as that.

Stop seeing her and tell her she knows where you are if she decides she wants you.

You might think it's harsh but it's in everyones best interests, trust me.
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id agree with this.
 
Hellsmk2 said:
Just bear in mind that that she will probably "dispose" of you in a similar way if it comes to it. She's messing you around whilst also messing him around. She just wants to know that someone else fancies her: Something else to have a bit of control and inflated ego over.

Steer clear and go for someone who isn't a complete tool.
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Best post in the thread.
 
Apparently she has wanted to leave him for a while but he has been making her feel really guilty about something which I can't tell you guys.

Anyway shes told me shes going to do it because even if things dont work out with us she wont be worse off.

Her friends have all been telling me to just give her time because she honestly really does like me.
 
M0T said:
Apparently she has wanted to leave him for a while but he has been making her feel really guilty about something which I can't tell you guys.

Anyway shes told me shes going to do it because even if things dont work out with us she wont be worse off.

Her friends have all been telling me to just give her time because she honestly really does like me.
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Honestly, I think she's taking you for a ride.

:(
 
Hellsmk2 said:
Just bear in mind that that she will probably "dispose" of you in a similar way if it comes to it. She's messing you around whilst also messing him around. She just wants to know that someone else fancies her: Something else to have a bit of control and inflated ego over.

Steer clear and go for someone who isn't a complete tool.
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Well said. :)
 
Dimitris said:
DON'T!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



If you ask her to leave and she does, it shows she doesn't have much consideration for the bf, treating him like Don't Quote Swearing!.

If she doesn't, you will be played the fool, for each little mistake you make, can be the reason why she can't leave him yet...


my advice for your own sanity is :

find another woman.
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quoted for truth

+ if she is willing to leave him so easily, does that mean she'd do the same for you if something happened down the line?
 
Right an update:

She has admitted that this guy was the rebound guy from a more serious relationship and she has been wanting to leave him for a while.

She has told all her friends about me and from the messages (100 in 2 days) she is obviously completely head over heels about me.

So we are going to probably hook up.

Now the problem, I told my mate who used to fancy her about it and so I was having a candid discussion about it talking matter of factly about the situation. He said he was cool about it all. Anyway it turns out he got the wrong end of the stick and thought I just fancied her or something, when he realised something was going on he has refused to talk to me since.

I almost told her to go away the other day because I was feeling so guilty about it but he then told me he wasn't bothered any more and had accepted she didn't like him like that.

Also from the experience of my friends most of them realise that if someone doesn't like you then you should step aside and not get hung up if someone else gets in.

Now I feel guilty and don't know if I should just end it so I don't lose my mate, even though I really like the girl. Argh!
 
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